Bewitched

- Mother. - Good morning, darling.

I have a feeling you're trying to tell me something.

Those were in you-know-who's briefcase.

- So? - Well, don't you care...

if he carries pictures of other women?

Mother, in the advertising business, other women are merely...

- tools of the trade. - Oh, blind faith...

is unbecoming to you, Samantha.

Don't you understand? I trust Darrin.

You wouldn't turn a child lose in a candy store, would you?

Darrin is not a child.

Well, he's only human.

Isn't that the excuse they always make for themselves, "I'm only human"?

They know their limitations better than we do.

Well, I don't think of Darrin as being merely human.

I think of him as being a cut above the ordinary mortal man.

How can a witch of mine be so naive?

Mother, will you please go away.

Very well, very well, I'm leaving. But remember, Samantha...

no mortal pulls the wool over a witch's eyes while I'm around.

What are these doing here? Thought I left them in my briefcase.

You better eat your breakfast. You'll be late.

I've been looking at girls for weeks.

Yes, I suppose that could get tiring after a while.

You're not kidding.

Which one do you like best?

- For what? - Miss Jasmine, the perfume account.

Oh, yes. Of course.

Well, let's see, now.

This one has lovely eyes.

And this one has a beautiful mouth.

This one has a great figure.

Gee, I don't know.

Why don't you cut out the best piece of each...

and paste them together like I used to do.

With paper dolls.

Look, I'm serious, Sam.

The campaign starts tomorrow, and we haven't picked a Miss Jasmine.

Incidentally, we have to forget about having lunch together today.

- How about tomorrow? - Well, all right.

As long as you promise to have lunch alone today and not enjoy it.

I'll do better than that.

I'll have lunch with Larry Tate and really be miserable.

Better get going.

You better get going.

Okay. But remember, you threw me out.

- So, what do you think? - Marvellous. Incredible.

Some of the most gorgeous creatures I ever laid eyes on, but...

I still haven't seen that je ne sais quoi...

that ethereal quality we need in a Miss Jasmine.

Courage, old friend. Don't lose faith, we'll find her.

I know that.

I was just thinking about going home to Louise tonight.

I don't know, after a week of looking at these, it seems pointless somehow.

- Now, Larry, you've got a lovely wife. - I suppose so.

If you'll excuse me, Darrin, I'm going out to try...

and wipe out the memory of all this.

I never could stand too much of a good thing.

- Yes? - I hoped you'd say that.

- I beg your pardon? - Aren't you looking for a Miss Jasmine?

I was. I mean, we are.

- Won't you sit down, Miss...? - Janine Fleur. Thank you.

Have you done much modelling, Miss Fleur?

I'm sure I could be everything you want...

in a Miss Jasmine, that is.

You might. Yes, you just might.

Hello, Larry? Can you come in here for a minute?

Good.

- Is something wrong? - Wrong? No.

You may solve a very big problem for me, Miss Fleur.

- Janine. - Well?

Well...

Well.

I'm thinking exactly what you're thinking, Larry.

I won't say anything if you won't.

You've been very quiet tonight. You have a bad day at the office?

Oh, it wasn't a bad day.

It wasn't a good day.

As a matter of fact, it wasn't a bad day.

Well, don't commit yourself. Anything new on Miss Jasmine?

- We found one. - You did?

Oh, that's marvelous. What's she look like?

- Attractive. - Attractive?

You said you needed something gorgeous.

Well, she's sort of gorgeous.

- She's blond, I'll bet. - No, not really.

Well, what's she look like?

Tall, straight nose, experienced.

Well, that could be Abraham Lincoln.

I said she was pretty.

You said she was attractive. There's a difference.

- What's her name? - Janine Fleur.

Oh, sounds like perfume.

- Does she look like she sounds? - You could say that.

I haven't seen her. What do you say?

- Yes. - Yes, what?

She sounds like perfume, she looks like perfume...

- she even smells like perfume. - You smelled her?

No, of course not.

Not deliberately. She's exactly what Larry and I have been looking for.

Well, that's wonderful.

Now, how would you like to go to the movies, eat popcorn and smooch?

I would love to...

but I've got to work on some exploitation ideas.

He's very evasive.

That shows interest.

He is only interested in that woman because of business.

You'd better make it your business.

Did you notice that he kissed you on your forehead?

The next thing you know, he'll be patting your hand.

"Notes on Jasmine campaign:

Janine Fleur, measurements 37-23-37."

"Adjectives to be used in copy describing her:

Provocative, dazzling, ethereal.

Personally supervise photographs for campaign.

Get headshots featuring her large, soft, dark eyes.

Get night shots at beach. Moonlight.

Janine holding perfume bottle in her long, slender fingers.

"Should be irresistible in a bikini."

- What happened? - You were having a nightmare.

- Didn't seem like one. - I say it was.

I know a nightmare when I see one.

Go back to sleep, dear.

- Well? - I'd like to change her position a bit.

Figures.

Here, Janine, why don't you try your hand here, stroking the bear's nose.

Thank you.

There you go.

You keep moving her around, we'll be here all day.

I think we've got it now.

Hold it.

- Thank you. Is that lunch? - Go ahead.

Lunch, Janine.

Oh, wonderful idea. I'm starving. Where shall we go?

We? I'm afraid I can't. I'm meeting my wife.

Well, I wouldn't ask you or interfere, except that it's...

- Well, never mind. - Well, what is it?

Well, it's probably foolish, but I think you'd better get another Miss Jasmine.

Another Miss Jasmine? What for?

Now, hold it. I think we better talk about this.

- But your lunch. - I'll cancel it.

- Please don't do that because of me. - My wife will understand.

She knows that at the moment the most important thing is Jasmine Perfume.

- Go and change, and I'll give her a call. - All right, I'll hurry.

Hello? Oh, hi, darling. I was just leaving.

What?

Oh, no, no. I understand.

Yes, well, you go ahead. I'll see you tonight.

Well, well, well.

All dressed up and nowhere to go.

- I am going to have lunch with Darrin. - Really?

One of these days when he's not too busy.

- Oh, I understand, dear. - No, you don't.

You think my husband is taking another woman to lunch.

- I haven't said a word. - Well, it's business.

Oh, yes, of course.

Well, I was going to suggest that perhaps we could have lunch together.

Oh, certainly. You know where Darrin is...

so you're gonna bring me face to face with him to prove your point.

- I never suggested it. - I won't.

- Very well. - I'll tell you what I'll do.

- What? - I am going to take you there...

and bring you face to face with Darrin to prove my point.

Wait for me, Samantha.

Oh, isn't this delightful. We must have a waiter. Waiter.

Menu.

Thank you.

- Mother, are you sure he's here? - Quite sure.

Oh, they have Coquille St. Jacques.

They make it marvellously here.

Mother.

I don't believe it.

I'm sure I will.

Where is he?

I know this is upsetting for you, darling...

but I'm not in the least surprised.

But, Mother, why? I thought he was happy with me.