Leprechaun 3

One video camera... Beta! By golly.

Good evening, my friend. Welcome. So nice to see you.

I need money to buy gas so I can get out of this place.

Yes, of course.

You will be showing me what is in the sack then?

I can give you a hand. May I?

Just open up here.

Oh, my, my, my! What is this horrible thing?

He's a good luck charm.

Yes, I can see it's working very well.

Whatever you do, don't touch the medallion.

No, I won't.

I am giving you...

- 10... - No!

$20.

Goodbye.

Come back soon!

Oh, my! Only a face a mother could love.

Nothing but junk!

"Don't touch," he says, because it might break. It's so cheap.

Oh, my goodness. Gosh.

Oh, Gupta, by golly. You're a bloody genius.

You're making a wonderful deal for $20.

- (SCREAMS) - (GRUNTS)

I like Indian food! So spicy!

Who are you?

I'm a leprechaun, me lad, and you're a greedy thief.

For trying to steal me gold, I'll be giving you some grief.

Have a lie-down, lad.

Nice leather! I appreciate a good pair of shoes.

Ah!

Don't mind if I do!

I think I'll whack you in the head a dozen times until you're dead.

Take it away! Take it away!

- You're being afraid of this? - Stay away, I'm warning you.

I'll tear your eyes out and I'll rip your face off.

You're a bloody devilish creature!

You wanted me gold, and you suffer the consequences.

Now I'll take what's mine, and be gone from here.

No! You and your gold belong to Gupta.

Well, you missed us both.

You wanna back up and try that again?

- Sorry. - It's all right, happens all the time.

Do you know anything about cars? 'Cause this one doesn't work.

- Name's Scott. - Tammy.

Tammy. Great. What seems to be the problem?

Obviously, I don't know. It just died on me.

Well, let's take a look.

Ah! Well, see, someone stole your engine.

Start it up for me, if you can.

- What do you think? - Have you ever blown a rod before?

I beg your pardon?

The engine, I meant.

See, you got your pistons, and your rods, and...

- You don't wanna know this, right? - No, actually, I don't.

I'll give you 10 bucks if you give me a ride to work.

Forget it.

You don't have to pay me. Where do you work?

Chicago.

Yeah, got me.

Chicago.

That's very good. I would have taken you there, too.

Where is it? I know it is here somewhere.

Here it is. " Legends and Folklore ."

"Leprechauns."

Good day to ya.

The name's O'Reilly, and I'm here to tell you about leprechauns.

Legend has it that they were once magical elves in ancient times

who became obsessed with riches and gold.

...96,

97.

98, 99...

I'm one shilling short!

Wow! Look at all the lights! It's unbelievable!

Yeah, it's a quaint little place.

- So where do you work? - The Lucky Shamrock.

- What's that? - It's a casino, Scott.

What do you do there?

- I'm a magician. - Right on!

Actually, right now, I'm just a magician's assistant.

But one of these days, I'm gonna have my own act.

I believe you.

One little, two little three little leprechauns

Four little, five

little, six

little leprechauns

This place is unknown, so I'll leave it here.

Me own savings and loan. I'll have nothin' to fear.

Remember, his power lies in his gold, and he'll use all his magic to protect it.

Yes, try to protect it from this.

So is this your first trip to Vegas?

Yeah. Actually, I'm just passing through. I'm on my way to LA.

Oh.

- You're gonna be a movie star? - No, actually, I'm on my way to school.

My first year of college.

Great! It's a smart move. Go to school. Learn something worthwhile.

I just thought I'd swing through Vegas, you know, see what it's like.

Take my advice and don't stay long.

Yeah?

Vegas has a way of latching on to a person.

You wanna go, but you can't.

I'll remember that.

Potatoes are a leprechaun's favorite meal.

Like all good Irishmen, he loves his spuds,

but he'll take a bite out of anybody who threatens to steal his gold.

Woe betide the man who covets a leprechaun's shillin'.

He'll batter and brain them, he'll mangle...

My, my, my!

Now let us go find your little brothers and sisters.

In fact, let us find the entire family.

If a mortal gets hold of a leprechaun's gold,

he'll be given one wish for every shilling in his possession.

He can have anything he wants in the whole world.

- (FOOTSTEPS SOUNDING) - (GASPS)

Thanks for the ride. I really appreciate it.

- Sure. - Bye.

Hey, I've never been inside a real casino.

Oh, forget it. You gotta be 21.

I know, but I thought maybe you could sneak me in,

so I can see what it's like inside.

What do you think? This is like Disneyland or something?

I could lose my job for that. My boss could lose his license.

And you will lose your shirt.

Right. I didn't think about that. I'm sorry.

All right, look.

If I get you into the den of iniquity here, you gotta promise me something.

- No gambling. - Okay.

Just take a look around, see what you gotta see, and beat it.

- I'm out of there. - All right.

So who do you work with? I mean, magician-wise?

Right now, I'm assisting The Great Fazio.

What's a Fazio?

Well, Scott, a Fazio is a mediocre magician who couldn't pull a rabbit...

out of a pet store. But it pays the bills.

Remember now, no trouble, okay? In and out.

Okay.

Maybe I could come see your show, and we could have dinner afterwards.

Er, it's a possibility, if I'm not busy. Who knows?

In you go.

You are mine, you little bugger.

You missed me! You missed me!

If you're gonna linger, I'll give you the finger.

Stay away from me, you steaming pile of cannibal dung!

I'm a dangerous man!

Stay away from me!

Leprechauns do have their loveable side...

Why, I remember when Paddy McGinty's goat was sick with...

I want me shilling!

Oh, Yes, yes!

All right.

Whoa!

Thank you, Melissa.

- (GIGGLES) - You're terrible.

- Come on. Yes!

All right!

Roll again, Father Bob!

- Give me those dice here. - More money.

More money, more money. Here we go.

Ready?

Here she goes. Look at this!

Yes! - Whoo! All right.

Excellent.

What time is it?

It's after 7:00. Where's Tammy?

I don't know, damn it! She's got work to do!

What do you keep her around for anyway? She's not worth a damn.

She's got a way of filling out a costume.

I could look just as good, you know. Why don't you hire me?

Twenty years ago, Loretta, or should I say 20 pounds ago?

I am not always gonna look just like this, pally.

No? You find the fountain of youth or something?

I've been saving my pennies, buddy boy,

and one of these days, I'm gonna come waltzing in that door

with everything packed into all the right places.

You need more than a boob job, Loretta. You need a personality transplant.

Bitch!

I'm sorry I'm late, Fazio.

I told you, you will address me as "Great One."

Off stage and on.

You're a magician, not the Pope.

I am your teacher. You will show me respect.

Right.

Loretta.

Mmm-hmm.

Throw me that lighter.

Ow!

- Are you doing the magic rings tonight? - Screw the magic rings.

Oh, my God!

I've got something 10 times better.

You're in the box, I do the standard switch gag,

and then I set fire to the box!

The audience goes nuts, thinking you're in there being burnt alive.

I'm gonna call it "The Burning Beauty."

Oh, God!