Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III

Prince Kenshin, you must turn back.

Return with us at once. KENSHIN: No.

Give up your weapon.

Do not harm him. Take him prisoner.

No, you will have to kill me first.

Take him to the castle.

Mitsu!

Yeah, baby.

- All right. - Yeah.

Yo, rock 'n' roll. Whoo.

Yeah.

Uh-oh. Turtle tantrum.

- What? - Uh-oh. Oh, no.

Hold it.

Oh, Raf, come on.

- What's going on, Raf? - Nothing.

Have patience, my son.

- What are we doing this for? - What?

Day after day, practicing, killing ourselves, for what?

Oh, Raphael. RAPHAEL: Nobody appreciates us.

Nobody sees us.

Nobody even knows we're alive down here!

Hey, guys.

How's it going?

Hi.

- Fine. Good hair day? - Brought you some stuff.

I love stuff. LEONARDO: Stuff!

Goodies.

Later.

Let's see what's in the bags.

Here are the keys to my apartment.

Dude, in here? APRIL: Somewhere. Stop peeking.

- No peeking. - I'm not peeking,

- I'm spelunking for pork rinds. - Don't lose them.

- Okay. - Oh, God, I need this vacation.

You're not the only one. LEONARDO: Take us with you.

Come on, take us with you.

- Sorry, sorry, sorry. - Please.

Sorry, guys, my suitcases are very full.

Oh, too bad.

Hey, I didn't forget about you guys.

I bought a lot of fun stuff at the flea market for you.

- All right! Yeah! - Awesome!

- All right. - Okay, where's Raf?

He's in another funk.

Again? LEONARDO: A major funk.

Maybe this will cheer him up.

Hey, smooth. - Pretty cool, huh?

Nifty lid. APRIL: Very Raf. All right.

This is for Mikey.

- Yes. - Alrighty.

Let's see. DONATELLO: It's a lampshade.

What else do we have here? - Maybe there's other pieces.

And for Leonardo.

There you go.

Japanese swords. APRIL: Donatello.

This will keep you busy while I'm gone.

- Thanks. - All right.

And for Splinter.

- Where is he anyway? - Cool.

He's doing rat stuff.

Found this...

Actually, I don't really know what it is.

Some kind of a weird antique or something.

I think it's Japanese.

Elvis Presley in Blue Hawaii.

Oh, you're so cute.

Ooh, a super androdyne radio with triode tubes. Boss.

Hey, what's that, April?

Some kind of weird Japanese antique...

egg timer.

Kenshin.

I forbid you to leave the castle.

You have disgraced me.

It is you who have disgraced me, Father...

with your unjust war.

Walker.

Walker, you're alive.

Yes, I'd say that was a fair assumption.

Survived the shipwreck, built some new ones and, well...

here I am, hungry again.

Niles!

Move along, lads.

Yes.

Your sentries, I believe.

Must be a comfort to know how well-protected you are, Lord Norinaga.

Kenshin.

Inside.

Now.

Children are such a pest, aren't they?

Especially when they side with the enemy.

Oh, dear. Damn nuisance.

I just keep birds now.

Little finches.

Shut up, Niles.

Right, I have three ships sitting in your harbor...

loaded down with powder and muskets...

absolutely guaranteed to win your ambitious war.

"Open wide the gates of time."

Uh... Guys?

Guys.

What's going on?

Wait a second here.

What is this?

Lay low.

Whoa, my face.

Feels like tornado weather.

Wait, the light.

No way.

She's a man.

Huh?

April?

Whoa.

Mm. You have that effect on people, don't you, master?

Out cold.

Okay.

Hi.

Wakey, wakey. Wake up.

- Guys, do these clothes look familiar to you? - What?

Wake up.

Wake up, weird-looking James Dean dude.

Think he's coming around. Hey?

Kappa? Cappuccino? No, it makes me hyper.

- What's a kappa? - Ancient Japanese demon.

Some were good and some were very bad.

- Oh. - Yes.

Demons.

Hey, he speaks English.

Where's he from anyways?

Well, Judging from sword...

I'd say feudal Japan.

Oh. That explains why he speaks our language.

England started trading with Japan...

in the late 16th century. RAPHAEL: All right.

How did you get in April's pants?

I just wanna know what happened to April.

It seems the scepter has magic powers...

and somehow transported them both through time.

Hold on, dudes.

If April's back in feudal Japan, does that mean we, like...

have to ride that scepter back through time to get her?

- Cool. - You have no choice, my son.

Awesome. But do you think they had pizza back then?

Get out of town.

What happened?

Coming in.

What's going on, captain?

Ignorant, superstitious fools.

We was just wondering.

Them, you moronic toad.

They seem to think the woman's some kind of witch.

She's some sort of a witch. - Shut up.

- Some sort of a witch. - Yeah.

Would you keep quiet!

Sorry?

Look, I took Spanish in high school.

Whoa. Hey, easy.

Next time, ask me to turn it off.

Where is my son, witch?

Hey...

I really don't have a clue, okay?

So why don't you just drop this macho stuff?

Lord Norinaga, allow me.

The Daimio and his court believe that you're a witch...

who has somehow managed to spirit away his son.

Is this true?

Yeah.

Yeah, it's true.

I am a witch.

See that?

I shrunk four incredibly cool guys...

and I locked them in there.

Really?

Then go ahead, witch. Shrink me.

Don't push me, Ruffles...

or I'll melt you into a steaming puddle of puke.

She has no power.

Let me question her about your son.

Then you can roast her, toast her, chop her into tiny little pieces...

- and feed her to the birds. - No.

I want her to suffer.

Let's see here.

If I subtract the cosine from the inverted integer...

then I can take the flangeler and put that here.

Oh, that's it. Of course.

It's equal mass displacement.

See, guys, for every one of us that goes back...

someone from the past will come here.

But the problem is...

that switch will only work under one condition.

You know what that is?

Tuesdays?