Face to Face (Forhøret)

Three weeks and five days.

I feel there's so much I ought to say.

But I don't have the words.

All I know is

that you've been dead for three weeks

and five days.

A mother shouldn't bury her child.

I don't understand.

I'm trying, but I can't.

You were my flesh and blood, my whole world.

I loved you.

Why wasn't that enough?

It's as if darkness gathers around me.

The nightmare is suffocating me.

FACE TO FACE

Mom?

Yes?

I made an appointment last week regarding my smoke cessation.

- Of course. - John.

Yes, I know.

Please come in.

- I brought donuts. - That's nice.

PSYCHOLOGIST & HYPNOTHERAPIST SUSANNE EGHOLM

Have a seat. I'll be right with you.

- My practice is in there. - Yes, I'm sorry.

It's nice with a wall like that. It keeps the memories alive.

I don't know what you know about me, but I've been practicing for 10 years

treating patients with life crises,

addictions and compulsions, utilizing hypnosis.

Do you mind?

I haven't had breakfast, and it is the most important meal.

Of course.

I just want you to know that you can speak freely about anything.

My mother always told me the holes in the bagels were poisonous.

So...

Well...

- Why do you want to stop smoking? - I smoke too much.

- And how much is that? - Over 60.

- That is a lot. - That's what my wife says.

- Did she send you? - No, no. This is all me.

- So you want to stop smoking. - Absolutely.

And why today? Why did you come see me today?

It's become too much, I mean...

- This is all I can think about. - How so?

It's a bit much at home these days.

How?

It's my stepson, Benjamin.

He died.

He was ten. Sudden cardiac arrest.

He collapsed three weeks ago. Just like that. Dead.

That must be a terrible shock.

Sure.

He was my stepson, but I'd known him for over eight years.

His dad's an idiot, so I was the one who was there for him.

He was a good boy.

He really was.

He had this wild head of hair,

freckles, big ears, and always with a huge smile on his face.

Always up for anything.

Never said no. Always ready for adventure.

And then, all of a sudden, he'd grab my hand

with his own little sticky hand.

He'd smile at me, and I'd smile back. And I was happy.

What...

What are you thinking?

That I understand why you need to talk about that.

It's odd, because I...

I never thought much about death before.

It was just there for others.

But...

It's as if something's stuck inside me.

Something that isn't good.

Tell me what's stuck.

How do you feel?

Try to get in touch with that feeling.

I shouldn't be here.

This was a mistake.

It's only natural to have feelings and thoughts you don't want to share.

You don't have to share them with me.

I look at my wife, and all I see is...

a lump of flesh.

A lot of grey flesh that sobs and cries and snots.

- I can't do this. - John, sit down, please.

You're doing fine. Don't leave now.

When you experience a great loss

it can feel like your body goes numb.

Like your nervous system shuts down in the face of great physical pain.

Try to explain what you feel

when you think about Benjamin and your wife.

Nothing.

I get a craving for these, that's all.

So you think about your cigarettes.

All I want is to smoke a cigarette. You do hear it, right?

It's entirely normal to protect yourself from strong emotions.

To get through them, you focus on something concrete.

Such as a packet of cigarettes.

You take one.

You light it.

You fill your lungs with smoke.

Calm.

A moment in time when all is forgotten.

And your wife?

Does she like donuts, too?

Yes, or the ones with custard.

Those are the ones I prefer, too.

- I prefer the ones with icing. - I see.

- And Benjamin? - Also icing.

Did he not eat the hole, either?

Is that something you can read a ton of stuff from?

No. Not at all.

I've stopped analysing people, I just talk to them.

But maybe I shouldn't be smoking now that you're here to quit.

No.

Last one.

Goodbye.

So you're up for going ahead?

How does the hypnosis work?

Hypnosis is focused attention in a relaxed state

that allows me to talk more directly to your subconscious.

And we'll only talk about the cigarettes?

You won't say anything you don't want to.

Right.

So, let's do it.

Good.

It's in there. Come with me.

Come on in.

Okay.

If you'll sit there with your legs up and make yourself comfortable.

- Comfortable? - Yes.

What do you think to feel safe and calm?

- I think about my boat. - Your boat. Good.

Close your eyes and focus on your breathing.

Calmly, inhale.