Debbie Does Dallas Part II

Well, it seems Debbie Benson

didn't make that Texas cheerleading squad.

She tried her heart out, but guess it wasn't meant to be.

Brokenhearted and just plain broke,

she decided what she needed was a change of scenery.

- What's the matter, honey, they didn't throw you

off the squad?

Kicked me off nothing.

After raising all that money

and going through all that trouble,

when I got there, they told me I was too young.

Well, I never.

I mean, you'd think they could've told me

before I went through all that trouble.

Who wants to be a Texas cheerleader, anyway?

Rooting on a bunch of sissies wearing all that stuff

just to make them look big.

You betcha.

They're a bunch of faggots, anyway.

I'm gonna be a country western singer,

and I'm gonna be just like Billie Holiday,

but even more famous.

- You sure you don't wanna come up to my place

and freshen up a little bit before you see your aunt?

No, sir, I've gotta catch my aunt

before she starts her daily chores,

cause she don't know I'm coming

and I gotta get there before she goes to work.

What was that you said your aunt did?

I don't know, I guess she raises cows

or something, cause she runs around.

Well, what's the name of the farm?

Well, the only reference I had to it

was a letter from Mom, and she referred to it as the ranch.

You mean The Ranch?

I don't know, I guess so.

- Are you sure you don't wanna come with me

and freshen up, first?

Oh, no, I'm sorry, but I've gotta go.

Maybe I'll see you again sometime.

Bye.

Yes, sir, Debbie had her mind made up.

She was going straight to that ranch

if she had to walk all the way there.

Hold on, hold on.

Say what?

Say what?

What are we gonna do?

You're fucked. - Yep.

- Well? - Oh Shit.

Hey, wait a minute.

What?

Gotta look at this.

- What? - Wow.

Let me see it.

Hold on, I haven't

had my fill yet. - Stop hogging the glasses!

Let me see the glasses. - Willie Mac,

I'm only looking after your health.

I'll worry about my own damn health.

Would you look at the knockers on her!

Holy shit. - Yeah.

And you know, Willie Mac,

I bet that damn bitch is hitchhiking.

Yeah, hitchhiking's against the law,

isn't it?

Sure is.

Let's go check her out, man.

Yeah, I think we should.

Uh oh, looks like Debbie's in

for some Texas police hospitality.

All right, where's your ID, woman?

I lost it, I don't have any!

Likely story.

It's the truth.

Well, what are you doing out here?

I'm just walking on the road.

- I bet you're either hitchhiking or hustling.

I certainly am not.

You're under arrest, woman.

For what?

- We'll tell you that when we get downtown.

Yeah, let's put her in the car.

What car?

You lost it.

You lost it.

There's one.

Stop, stop!

Stop in the name of the law!

Okay, you, get out!

Did you hear me? I said get out!

Come on, beat it!

Leave me alone, come on.

Get me out of here! - Come on.

Get your hands off me!

- Real nice. - Leave me alone!

- Really? - Leave me alone!

Get me out of here! - Have some.

Let me get my car.

Get your hands off me!

Get your hands off!

Hey, Willie John, hey, Willie Mac.

Oh, hi, Willie John, how you doing?

Oh, not too bad.

What you guys got there?

Some dangerous criminal, I think.

Yeah, probably a hustler.

I certainly am not.

Hey, you shut up there, woman.

Yeah, this is for men folk.

What the hell have I got myself into?

- Hey, you boys know where you're at, don't you?

Get your hands off me!

You're within town limits.

- Ah, yeah. - Oh, shit.

And you boys know that your jurisdiction

stops at that sign.

- Yeah, what the hell's the matter with you guys, anyway?

Hey, you shut up, woman.

Leave me alone, come on!

Now, you boys know that this is my town.

It's my car.

- Get your hands off me! - And what happens

on that side of the line is your business.

What happens on this side is mine.

Now, let's not get into trouble over a silly woman.

Oh, Little John, you know.

Can't we work something out together, man?

Look, that's the way it's always been,

and I ain't setting no precedents.

Now, you guys get out.

- Little John, come on. - I said get out.

All right, you whore hound.

You're gonna be sorry for this.

Yeah, it's just one of the sins

I'm gonna have to rot in Hell for.

What the hell's going on?

Get into my car, woman!

Where you gonna take me?

- Five minutes away to a little bit of Heaven

or a little bit of Hell.

Depends on you.

Okay, Little John.

Have it your way.

I intend to.

Well, being as how it was his jurisdiction,

Deputy Little John placed Debbie in custody

and hauled her ass off to jail.

Shit.

Goddamn son of a bitch.

He does one more of them little honeys

and his dick is gonna fall off.

- Well, we're gonna do something to make sure

he don't get away with this one.

- Get in there. - Well, you don't have

to be so rough.

Shut up.

Are you really gonna put me in a cell?

Well, that depends on you, darling.

Well, what do you mean, Sheriff?

- It's Deputy. - Well, you look

like a sheriff to me.

Let's not skirt the issue.

I'm wearing jeans.

Well, you're gonna be wearing this.

Put it on.

Put it on!

Take off your shirt.

Well, oh, sure, where am I gonna change?

I'll show you where to change.

In there. - Take it easy!

Take off your blouse.

No.

I said, take off your blouse.

Do I have to?

It's the law, honey.

Turn around!

I wanna see those tits.

Faster, hurry up, come on!

There, you satisfied?

Now, take off your pants.

No!

I said, take off your pants!

It's the law.

Hurry UP-

This how you get your kicks?

Pervert.

- Underwear and boots, come on, I don't have all day.

Neither do I.

The underwear.

No!

I said, take them off!

Hey, come on, woman, I said the underwear.

And I said no.

Shut the fuck up and take them off!

No.

Take off...

Get up.

Now take them off.

And the socks.