When We Get There

See that kid there?

That's me.

I'm the one trying to cheer up that serious looking kid.

That kid is my twin brother, Cal.

Fraternal twins obviously.

And he's the ugly one.

I don't know why she named him Callahan really.

It's a pretty weird name.

I thought maybe she named me Tyler after Tyler Durden

of Fight Club fame.

But the math didn't really add up on that one.

I do know we both have the same middle name because of our dad.

His name was Griffin.

But we never met him

and she didn't like to talk about it.

Cal is pretty much the best dude.

He really is.

See, I can get a little--

well, he keeps me grounded, you know.

But then he's also kinda like, I don't know, um--

sometimes I think if our souls were like bodies of water,

that his would be this huge turbulent sea

that's, like, so deep

you can never see the bottom, you know?

And then I'm like a swimming pool.

Ghost!

Ghost!

That was our secret code word.

Somebody drops ghost on you,

you drop everything for them.

Our mom was a freaking saint.

She was the principal of our middle school,

which is totally as brutal as it sounds.

We got away with nothing.

Who can blame her?

She was raising us on her own.

Mom never talked about our dad

and after a while,

I guess we stopped asking.

Plus it really bothered Cal when I bring him up,

so I just started imagining

having cookouts with Liam Neeson.

In my head,

my dad was always Liam Neeson from Love Actually.

Mom really loved that movie.

That's my mom.

That's Mom.

Ty.

Uh, we gotta go, man.

It's time.

Prepare your tie.

Take off your hat too.

Mom passed the week before we finished college.

I think she wanted to hold on but, man,

she was just--

she was sick for so long I think...

she got tired.

So now, we're at the end of, like, a lot of things.

I mean, what even happens after the end, you know?

Oh.

Got out of there really fast.

Yeah.

I think I know why.

It's because you had to fart really bad, isn't it?

You just had to get out of there before the service ended

-in a deafening roar... -Yeah.

-...of flatulent thunder. -Something like that.

-Right? Right? -You're hilarious.

I know.

Hey.

Well, um, that was nice.

I think--I think Mom would really like that.

It was just--it was beautiful

how many people showed up, you know.

-And, um... -Did you pay the organ lady?

Oh, shit. Um, no, but I--

No, I'll do it.

No, I will--I can do it.

I promise. Okay.

I'll do it.

Well, uh, are we gonna go?

You wanna go?

Uh, I mean, it's graduation.

Yeah, the ceremony is kinda for the parents, Ty.

Well, my dad is definitely expecting us to walk.

Yeah, and I know he wants to watch me walk

because I've been working on my strut,

maybe not you so much.

What?

He says he has something for you guys.

Huh.

All right. That's somehow scarier.

I'll take a gift.

All right. Great.

It's gonna be great. It's gonna be great.

It's gonna be great. And he's not gonna be weird.

-It is. -He's not gonna be weird.

It's probably something good.

You know, Ellie, I think we're close enough now

that I can tell you it's an absolute travesty

you didn't inherit your dad's English accent.

It's not hereditary. I was born here.

Yeah, well, he's like the scary Mary Poppins.

Or like a evil Bond villain.

No, Mr. Cal, I expect you to die.

You don't have to do that.

Vivi il sogno.

- You're not Italian. - Yes, but I've been to Italy.

Wow.

Vivi il sogno. Do you know what that means?

It means live the dream.

Oh, that's amazing.

Well, I suppose congratulations are in order.

- Dad. - University graduates.

I suppose that makes you fully fledged adults now.

- Don't be weird. - What's weird?

I'm simply congratulating these fine adult men

on joining the workforce, paying their taxes,

flushing childhood dreams down the toilet.

That. That, that is weird.

Oh, before I forget...

I'm sorry about your mother.

Well...

Thank you, sir.

Didn't like her politics...

-Dad. -...but she was a good person.

Yeah.

Well, she had to be with you hellions

running amuck out there.

Dad.

What?

I can't say I'm sorry.

I'm genuinely sorry.

Death, the dark mistress that awaits us all,

- just around the corner. - Dad.

Fine.

Anyway, I've, uh, I've procured some gifts for you

in honor of your achievements.

I'm sure your English major

will take you very far, Callahan.

Oh, my God.

-Thank you, sir. -Yeah, for sure. Thank you.

Well, don't just sit there, open them.

I wanna see the looks on your faces.

Oh.

Sweet.

A pen.

Thank you, Mr. Martin.

Oh, you're most welcome.

Everyone needs a good pen.

For correspondence and such.

Yeah, like, writing letters?

Naturally.

And, uh, Ellie got a pen too?

No, no, she's already got her gift.

It's called furnishing her entire apartment

in Philadelphia.

Now, why don't you get into the kitchen?

Enjoy some charcuterie.

That's French. But Ellie's mom got the good stuff from Italy.

Callahan, a word, if I may.

Uh-hmm.

Oh, yeah.

Care for a scotch?

No. Thank you, sir.

Uh, I mean, yeah. Yes, please, sir.

I wanted to talk to you.

Sure.

About Ellie.

- Okay. - My daughter.

Yeah.

She already has a job.

Just out of college and already got a job.

Yeah, I'm really proud of her.

Yeah, me too.

You know, I'll be honest with you, Cal.

I thought you two would break up in high school.

Huh.

But you didn't.

No, we didn't.

And now you're here.

-Yes. -Still dating Ellie.

-Yes, sir. -You have a job lined up?

Uh, not yet, no.

Uh, I'm a little distracted, I guess, with everything.

Oh, naturally.

But, um, once we get my mom's stuff squared away,

I'll get on the hunt.

Ellie will want you to go to Philadelphia, no doubt?

Um, well,

we haven't really discussed it actually.

Oh.

Well, let me, uh, let me say something about that.

Okay.

Don't mess this up for her.

Her life's just beginning

and she doesn't need to be feeling conflicted about leaving

because of a high school romance.

You have things to figure out, that's fine.

But do not get in her way.