Tarnation

I was having-- I was having the weirdest dream.

What kind?

It was about my mother.

Mm.

What happened?

Was it a nightmare?

Yeah.

?

No.

Is it raining?

Mm-hm.

Let's-- um...

Let's go to bed.

.

Hi, Maggie.

This is Jonathan Caouette again.

I'm, uh, just calling to get the status on my mother,

Renee LeBlanc.

Is she still not talking?

And they started the dialysis?

And do you know...

like, what the repercussions are of this?

'Cause I went on the internet earlier and it doesn't look too

hot.

Yeah.

Yeah, we could leave-- I could run a key over

to you before I have to go to the train station.

I feel like I'm gonna have an anxiety attack.

Yeah, I'm really-- I'm sick on top of it,

too.

I've got, like, a 102 fever.

I guess from all the stress.

- Go placidly amidst the noise and hate and remember what

peace there may be in solace.

As far as possible without surrender,

be on good terms with all persons.

Speak your truth quietly and clearly.

Listen to others.

Even the dull and ignorant too have their story to tell.

Avoid and aggressive persons.

They are vexations to the spirit.

If you compare yourself with others,

you may become vain and bitter, for always there will be greater

and lesser persons than yourself.

Enjoy your achievements as well as your .

Keep interested in your own career,

however humble.

real possession in the changing fortunes of time.

Exercise caution in your various affairs,

for the world is full of trickery.

But let this not blind you to what virtue there is.

Many persons strive for high ideals,

and everywhere life is full of heroism.

- Oh brother, I wonder how we're gonna sound on tape.

Horrible.

- That'll put us on the Jonny Carson show,

don't you think, Mother?

Oh, yes.

.

- I mean, wouldn't we really be a star attraction?

We sure would.

.

Yeah, it's still good.

What all do you wanna record on here?

Jonathan, say something to the tape recorder.

Say-- say "hello."

- Talk in the tape recorder,

darling.

Record.

- Are you gonna say your ABCs,

Jonathan?

Hm?

Go on, do some more.

Anything you say now is being recorded,

Mother.

What do you want to say?

- I have to .

- Do you want me to ?

.

.

That's a real wise decision.

Jonathan, what do you want to say,

baby?

A B...

- Did you know that this was February the 24th,

1975 and this is a Monday?

Hello.

Hello.

Hello.

Hello.

- Hello there, beautiful.

Hello.

Hello.

Hello there, beautiful.

Pattycake, pattycake, baker's man,

.

You have to do what, Mom?

.

- I like your teeth, they look good.

.

With what?

You don't have any teeth there.

.

Is it loud, darling?

No?

Is it loud?

No.

Is it soft?

No.

Do I love you?

Love you.

- Jonathan that man has pretty eyes.

Mommy has a boo-boo?

Where's mommy's boo-boo?

There.

Right there?

Thank you.

.

This is a family being recorded.

Be nice, you're on tape recorder now.

.

Am I on?

My name...

is Hillary...

Chapman Laura Lou Garia.

This is like a, um, testimony, isn't it?

Jimmy says when I wear too much makeup,

it makes me look like a whore, so...

sorry.

Hi.

Oh, I told you my name.

Um...

my testimony is about, um, me and my little baby...

Caroline.

I've b-- I've been through hell.

I'm kind of nervous here in front of you all.

What a year, you know?

1969.

Just... housewife for me.

Um, it all s-- started when, um...

Jim-- Jimmy was coming home late at night.

He was getting-- you know, getting into,

um, alcohol.

And I-- I was...pregnant with Caroline and...

still gaining the pounds.

She's only-- she's two years old now.

Healthy baby.

Um...

s-- she-- he used to beat me...

when he'd come home drunk at night.

He used to beat me.

And...

he used to, um...

he...kicked me in the stomach while I was pregnant.

And, um...

he'd tie me up...

when he was smoking that dope.

That's what got to him...in the brain there.

And, um...

.

This is really, um...

hard for me.

One night, he got out the gun.

I was tied up on the bed.

And he came and pointed it to my head.

He said, "I'll kill you, bitch.

I'll kill you!"

It was the other way around.

I-- I...

I got out the gun one night.

Blew his ass away.

That's it.

That's it.

- Wake up now.

Wake up, angel.

Wake up.

Wake up.

Get up.