Schmigadoon!

Improved by KID Resynced by KID Enjoy the movie(s) / show(s)

Push! Yes! There you go!

Okay, give me one more good push!

You can do it, Holly!

Tell her she can do it, Ted.

Okay, Ted says you can do it, Holly! Yes.

I usually give it a kick.

- Really? - Yeah.

Right there.

I mean, I could do it for you, if you'd like.

No, I've been doing all my own kicking since third grade, so...

What, so just one kick and then apparently magic?

Josh.

This has been the best year of my life.

I never thought I'd meet someone I connect with on so many levels.

You make me feel like I have a champion and a confidant.

I can tell you anything without judgment, and you always have my back.

I love you. So here's to us.

I feel the same way.

What?

"I feel the same way"?

Yeah. Yeah. Can we clink now?

It's our one-year anniversary.

I guess I was expecting something a little more special.

Sorry to interrupt. Would you like to see the dessert tray?

Sure, why not?

Happy anniversary.

No, it's mine.

So, what is the Sacred Heart Love Trail all about?

Well, six years ago, Joanna and I

took a look around and we were super bummed.

All these relationships falling apart.

Heartbreak out there on the planet.

So Marv and I created a way

for couples to disconnect from the world and reconnect with each other.

Before you head out, there's a couple of items that we've provided.

In your love bags.

The most important is a heart

carved out of sacred Chippewa stone with your name on it.

We ask that you give this to your partner every day

and think about what that really means...

- ...to give your heart to someone. - I love them.

Feel free to explore, but don't wander too far from the trail.

There's no cell service here in the wild,

and we don't want anyone dying out there.

Right.

Seriously, some people died last time.

Most of all, remember to use this time

as a way to grow your love for each other.

And don't worry about the clouds.

Weatherman says it'll clear soon

and the rest of the week is nothing but sunshine.

- Mel! - Leave me alone!

All I said was we should bail on the hike.

I didn't mean us in general. I just meant the hike!

I mean, come on, we've been lost for hours,

our phones don't work, we're wet and miserable,

you're pissed off at me for some reason.

- "For some reason"? - Okay.

You lost my heart.

I gave you my heart and you lost it.

Mel, it was a rock.

It was a metaphor.

I imbued it with meaning when I gave it to you.

Are you sure I didn't give it back to you?

Check your backpack, 'cause I'm telling you, I di...

Then why do I have your heart?

All right, so what... Do you want me to go look for it?

Okay, I'll do it. I will search this whole forest

for that one vaguely heart-shaped rock. Is that what you want?

Yeah.

Babe, it's a rock.

What is the point of doing this if you're not gonna put in any effort?

I don't know what the point of this is at all.

You don't wanna make our relationship better?

Our relationship is fine.

It's... fine.

Why does everything have to be perfect?

Why can't it just be enough?

Okay. Yeah. Keep pretending nothing's wrong, right?

'Cause it's easier that way.

This is exhausting.

Wait. What's that?

- Church bells? - You hear them too?

You sometimes hear church bells no one else does?

There must be a town across that bridge.

You see a bridge too?

We're still doing that?

That was weird.

It stopped raining.

"Schmigadoon"?

As long as they have a functioning toilet, I'm in.

And what's with all the fake plants?

Maybe they're conserving water?

Okay...

What is this?

And why is music coming from everywhere?

Welcome to our little town

Where friends are all you'll meet

And you will never see a frown

Hey, everyone.

Hey there, Pete.

We bet you're prob'ly Wonderin' what we call

The most beautiful, wonderful Magical place of all

What is happening?

It must be something they do for tourists. Like Colonial Williamsburg.

Schmigadoon

Where the sun shines bright From July to June

And the air's as sweet as a macaroon

Schmigadoon

Okay, we did not buy tickets. I repeat, we're not ticket holders.

Stop it. Let them sing.

Schmigadoon

Where it's warm And safe as a new cocoon

And our hearts all glow Like a harvest moon

Schmigadoon

Schmigadoon

Where the men are men And the cows are cows

And the farmers smile As they push their plows

And the trees are tall And we call it Schmigadoon

Come on, it's charming.

Charming? It's Wicker Man.

Our schoolmarm is Emma Tate She helps our kids to punctuate

Still unmarried at 28

In Schmigadoon

Farmer McDonough craved a son But he had daughters, every one

Touch 'em and you'll answer to my gun

In Schmigadoon

Sorry, Pete!

Larry Bean puts out our fires

Helen Pritt conducts the choirs

Doc is here to cure what ails

And I am here in case he fails

He is here in case he fails

Is Pete okay?

Henry Brown brings our ice

Madam Vina gives advice

In that shack is Buford Riggs

I do unspeakable things to pigs

He does unspeakable things to pigs

It's the mayor!

This is never gonna end.

It's the mayor.

As mayor of Schmigadoon

I feel that I must stress

Our motto is

"We always strive For peace and happiness"

Our motto is

"We always strive For peace and happiness"

But...

It's Mrs. Layton.

If Schmigadoon is to endure

It must be kept pristine and pure

This land on which our fathers trod

Must ever obey the laws of God

Everybody!

Schmigadoon!

Where the church bells ring Every day at noon

And the Wells Fargo wagon Brought my new harpoon

Schmigadoon

Sorry, Pete.

Where a man can dream Dreams so big and wide

And a gal can be there Right by his side

And there's hope for all Whether great or small

There's no folderol Bring your parasol

And we call it

Schmiga

Schmiga, Schmiga Schmiga, Schmiga

S-C-H-M-I-G-A-D-O-O-

Schmigadoon!

Yay! You guys did that!

- Can we please go now? - Already?

You know how much I hate musicals.

People don't just burst into song in real life.

You seem okay with magical hammers that come back when you call them.

That's totally different.

Thor is the god of thunder, and of course Mjollnir comes back when he calls.

- Howdy, folks. - No.

Please do not make me interact with the performers.

You know how much I hate the... Hey! Mr. Mayor.

Welcome to Schmigadoon.

Mayor Aloysius Menlove at your service.

And this is my wife, Florence.

Here, have a button.

I'm running unopposed again.

But who doesn't love buttons?

- I'm Melissa. This is Josh. - Pleased to meet you.

You'll be staying at the Schmigadoon Inn, of course.

You'll love it. Aloysius and I stayed there on our honeymoon.

Although we didn't get much sleep that night

on account of all the roosters out back.

- I see. - Actually, we were just headed out, so...

You know, we've been sleeping on the ground for days,

so why would we pass up an actual bed?

That settles it then.

Carson. Run down to the inn

and tell Harvey we have two very special guests checking in.

Yes, sir, Mr. Mayor.

Well, what an unusual and exotic couple the two of you make.

No wedding rings, I see.