Resident Alien

Previously on "Resident Alien"...

Hello, Harry. My name is Joseph.

You are a Grey.

I will call you Dickhead.

You should be helping each other,

not trying to kill one another.

There's a secret base in Wyoming.

It's where I suspect they keep all their information

on the Greys.

Please save my son.

There is only one person who may have the resources

to stop the Greys...

an Air Force general named Eleanor McCallister.

Tell me what's going on right now.

That's my secret.

You're a dinosaur.

What?

And lay on bed.

Damn it.

Well, you got the "leave him inside the house" part right.

Mm.

Morning. - Morning.

How'd you sleep?

Mm, great.

But I did roll off the bed again.

Well, I guess it's better than sleepwalking

and waking up outside.

Mm, that's true.

It's freezing this morning.

How do you know that?

I don't know.

Hmm.

Hmm.

Ah.

This is the express train to all Montana

underground facilities.

Travel time is approximately 6 minutes and 32 seconds.

On my planet, I worked alone, I ate alone.

My earliest memory was gestating in my egg, alone.

When I hatched, I was greeted by the mewling

of hundreds of siblings.

We all preferred solitude.

So naturally, we set upon killing each other.

It is different here on Earth.

They get strength from each other through cooperation.

Human babies cannot even live without help from others.

It is probably a good thing because if human babies

could kill, they would certainly do it.

What have you done here?

Ooh!

This is garbage.

Get out of here.

Go back to your desk.

Maybe take a break for the rest of the week.

I'll do it.

If these are the top human thinkers on Earth,

then we are all as dead as my siblings' mangled carcasses.

You've been here a week,

and output has slowed to a stop.

I am the only one working.

Because you're taking everyone's assignments.

I am the smartest being here.

It is just easier if I do it.

Lieutenant, why are the Grey aliens on Earth?

We don't know yet because

Harry isn't being a team player.

Look, we need to work together if we're

going to stop the Greys.

I should be employee of the month.

I saved everyone's butt here last week.

These are spacecraft we've acquired in the last 80 years.

This one might still have its weapon system intact.

Oh.

This is live.

Oh.

Is that a countdown?

Get behind the blast doors!

That was lucky.

You need to fall in line.

You're part of a team now.

Cave in! The roof!

Whoa.

Hey, you got up early to make me coffee?

Mm-hmm.

Thank you.

I'm building up goodwill.

I'm on the late shift next week,

so I've got a full week of 4:00 a.m. drunk slumber parties.

Oh, that's great.

Great.

Anything good?

Nah.

Just some boring stuff.

I hate living in a small town.

It's like, why do they even have a paper, right?

Wait. What is it?

Nothing. Please don't look at it.

Hmm.

I mean, so what?

You're not upset?

No, I don't care what some stupid

paper says about me.

Yeah, right.

I mean, look.

Last year, you were lying to me about Harry,

and I thought I was losing you, and it threw me.

But now it's different.

All right.

I'm proud of you.

Thank you.

Oh, um, I'm going to lock my door

when you come home at 4:00 a.m.

No, my bed's a block of ice, and I pick locks,

so get your warm feet ready.

So that climbing gym that my son and I

go to is actually pretty good.

You should check it out sometime.

Oh, I'd love to.

You know, I've been working out at home.

I curl Cletus three times a day.

Here you go. Whenever you're ready.

Thank you very much.

It's OK, I got it.

20... there we go.

OK.

Well, I am off to work.

Have a good day.

All right.

- Hi, Liv. - Hey.

Did you see that?

Lena paid for breakfast.

And she paid for dinner once last week.

Wow, yeah. That's like, wow.

You should be so angry and stuff.

Why, again?

Because that's not the natural order of things.

All right, men pay, women eat.

This goes back to caveman times.

The men, they... they go out on a hunt, right?

And then they take down a dinosaur.

And they drag it back to the hut, and then the women,

they prepare the cutlery and the lemonade,

then they all sit down, say grace, and eat.

To think just one statement could contain 200 million

years of misinformation.

Mm.

Sir, I printed out this still from the CCTV footage the day

Peter Bach was killed.

I think finding this guy in the passenger seat

is the key to our whole investigation.

Hey, what are you doing? Not here.

You never know who got eyes and ears on us, all right?

We'll look at this picture later.

I don't think I want to anymore.

I just really think we should go to the reservation.

Hi, Sheriff.

Get the V-A-N.

You need to leave that V-A-N alone.

It's been there for a week.

I want to check for.

F-I-N-G-E-R-P-R-I-N-T-S.

H-E-L-L-L-L no.

You had two fake cops show up at your place.

Whoever we're dealing with, they're professional

and they're well-funded.

Look, there goes a damn government

drone watching us right now.

I think that's just some mustard on the window.