Первые 200 строк.
Okay Amy, say goodbye
to this yucky old bathroom, and let's get ready
for the first day of construction
on the brand-new poopy palace!
Babe, I thought that we decided that we weren't
gonna call it poopy palace.
Quit trying to push poopingtime station, okay?
This is not a station. Well, if we open our minds,
it could be.
Who wants to take the first swing?
It's the best part. I do!
He said. Who cares? Anybody?
Chris, I want to talk to you just for one quick second,
so, honey, why don't you go to your Uncle Scotty.
Scott, don't take the first swing yet, though,
'cause I... I do kind of wanna...
honey, are we, like, 100% sure
that, uh... "Hmm" is right for this job?
Babe, what are you talking about?
Your brother is... Chr-shh!
You want to try to swing the hammer?
"Hmm" is an amazing contractor.
It's really fun, I promise.
I know, I'm just saying that I don't really want
my bathroom to be torn up for weeks and weeks
because "hmm" spreads himself too thin,
because "hmm" doesn't know how to say no.
Cracked your code, Reag. You're talking about Amy, right?
Scott, he's so solid.
That's what makes him such a great person.
Scotty, I'm sorry.
I know that you are so good at this.
When I look at you, all I see is my little brother
who broke his collarbone doing the worm
at a friend's bar mitzvah.
Did I stop dancing? No.
I got the job done.
Look, babe, your brother is overseeing
a half dozen projects much bigger than this right now.
He's a total pro. Scott, don't let Amy pick up
a sledgehammer. Okay, that's enough.
We're shuttin' it down! Shut it down.
Babe, look. Babe, stop, stop, stop.
Listen, you deserve a relaxing new bathroom, okay?
You work hard. Ava's stressing you out.
Ava's not that stressful.
This is a nightmare! Nightmare!
You come home from a long day.
You're tired. Your back's in knots.
But what's that waiting for you?
Your very own spa-quality jacuzzi tub.
Don't pick that up.
I'm painting a picture. Okay.
Pick up. Pick up!
the water is warm. The jets are bubbling.
Perhaps a handsome gentleman
shampoos your hair while you soak.
- Or... - Perhaps not.
Well, I have always dreamt of having my own
spa-quality jacuzzi tub.
Give me that.
Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Yeah.
- Ha! - Yeah!
Yeah!
No! I like it.
Nice!
Take it easy, babe. Whoa.
Careful on the backswing, honey.
- Ava, howdy! - Move it, nerds.
Ah.
- Reagan! - Hey, get in here, Ava!
You gotta take a few whacks.
The Ava show just got cancelled.
All right, I'm just going to ask this one more time.
Are we sure that the show has been cancelled?
- Yes, babe. - No, but listen to me.
I'm saying, are we sure? Are we certain in our hearts?
You called and confirmed it, and Ava told you multiple times
before she... Went away.
Oh, my God, the marsupial guy from the San Diego zoo
was supposed to be on the show today.
Did anyone call him to let him know that they're...
all the little koalas packed into that truck,
and it's a hot day. I know, but...
babies in their mamas' pouches.
Bad news, dudes. The remodel is going to take
way longer than I thought.
What are you talking about, dude?
Sorry, my pain in the boo-hiney boss
just pulled half my crew off to start
another construction gig.
Well, here's a tip for you.
When you get divorced, don't keep working
for your ex-wife's dad, especially if the guy's
a pain in the boo-hiney, was it?
What are you guys talking about?
Who's a boo-hiney? No, no, no, nobody.
No, Scott was just saying, "boy, I hope Reagan's enjoying"
that smooth wine-y.
Wooooh! Woo-ooh!
Okay, obviously the tension in this room
is giving Amy baby tourette's. No, no, no, no.
Babe, babe, the woo-hoos are a little inside joke
that we got going on, and she wants to be
a human hot dog, with extra tickle mustard
and a side order of...
Hey, Scott, why don't we just take Amy out
for a while, huh? We can go pick up the tile
for your bathroom.
With a baby, dude?
What is to become of my Ava show golf cart?
Oh, God, for all we know there's a hot truck
full of dead koalas.
Yes. Let's go to the tile store
with a baby, dude.
Every time you drink coffee, you have to look
at your ex-wife's father?
Better than looking at my ex-wife.
Amy, up top.
No? All right.
My old law firm's on this block.
Kind of an expensive area of town for a tile store,
don't you think? You said you wanted
this bathroom to be an oasis for Reagan.
When was the last time you heard someone say,
"check out all this cheap-ass tile in my oasis?"
Let's just not mention
the cost to Reagan.
In fact, probably the less that you actually talk
around her... Maybe, like, not even at all?
That'd be super.
When we were kids, whenever she was freaking out
about something, like grades, or boys,
or missing the violent femmes
because of cousin deena's confirmation,
Reagan's go to move was to whip out...
both: The vacuum. - Dude, she still does it.
I guess it gives her a sense of control.
You know what, dude? Pull over right here.
What, you got to take a whizard?
No, just... I'll be right back.
- You know what? - Yeah!
- We're lucky. - We are lucky.
Because, see, before, we only had one option.
- One option. - We have the show.
- The show. - Now, we have infinity options.
- Infinity options. - Tip that chair, please?
You got it, chief. You know what we should do?
We should do a dateline type show
where we talk about murder.
Look it. Amy's little binky.
She hasn't used this forever.
Or we could do a prison show where I go on the inside,
but I... I don't.
- Or, you know what? - Yes.
Maybe we just take a breather...
- mm-hmm. - For a second, and then kind
of figure out what it is that we really want to do.
Exactly. Take a breather, exactly.
- Hey, hey. - Hi.
- Hi, guys. Both: Hey!
Well, guess who just got their job back?
Me? Is it me? Did I just get my job back?
Well, just... I went and had a little pow-wow with Ted,
and told him I'm ready to be a lawyer again.
Oh, my God, Chris, that's fantastic.
Yeah, well, I just figured somebody's got to pay
for that 'cuzz... jacuzzi, yeah.
No, no, no, you don't want to abbreviate that.
No, the point is that you just...
you don't have to worry while you're trying to figure
out what you wanna do next.
What we're doing next. What we are doing.
I actually, um, think I know what mama wants to do.
Oh. It's th dateline murder thing, right?
I know, it just feels right.
What if I stay home with Amy
and I eat hot dogs all day?
You mean, like stay home, like, all afternoon today,
or...
No, for a while.
Really?
Yeah. Yeah.
Wow.
Big life decisions happening right in front of me,
yet I have no say.
You got the hot dog thing, again, it's adorable.
Reagan, I thought we were partners.
Oh, sweetie, I'm not going anywhere.
No! No, I know. I'm just... yeah.
No, I got it. Okay.
It's been a big day. Lots of developments.
I am just going to bid the family Brinkley adieu.
I think this is great stuff.
Keep going.
She's gonna be okay, right?
Yeah. No, no, no. If she was really upset,
she'd be blasting Melissa ether...
Idge.
No comments yet. Be the first to leave one.