See Dad Run

Mom!

Matthew Pearson just asked me out.

Look.

"What up? Want to hang?"

I know. I'm, like, dying.

Huh. An older boy with a car

asked you on a date.

Wait, you're not going to freak out like some

crazy, over-protective mom, are you?

Ew. Of course not.

No, no. I meant, "Whoo! Ha!

An older boy with a car asked you on a date!"

I'm totally cool with it.

You are cool.

But you know who, uh, might not be so cool...

and I say this, uh, one cool chick to another...

is your father.

So, you might want to run this by him.

Good idea. I'm going in.

Cover me.

Gotcha.

Dad!

Hey, daddy. Matthew Pearson wants to hang.

It's no biggie and mom's on board.

I'm sure you are too.

I don't even know why I'm asking.

So, thanks. Okay.

Honey, you're on board with this?

- Oh, yeah, yeah, I am. - Oh, ooh.

Uh, no, I don't, uh...

I don't know, em.

I'm not sure that you're, uh...

that you're cleared for landing.

Or if you can go to the ymca for that matter,

so I don't think...

- What? - Look at you.

You were my little baby once,

and now you're this beautiful girl.

Give me a hug, sweetheart. What?

What are you trying to say to me?

Don't let her go.

Oh, of course not. Yes.

Emily, no. You are not allowed to go

on a date with Matthew Pearson.

You're too young.

And you're way too young to fly an airplane.

This is so unfair.

And weird.

Well, I guess we nipped

that "dating an older boy" thing

in the bud, didn't we?

"We"?

Honey, I was the bud nipper. You were the bud kisser.

All right, dad.

First, I want to apologize for overreacting.

Thank you.

I totally understand where you're coming from with Matthew.

But I think it's funny how this played out so differently

on your TV show.

I'm not sure where you're going with this, Emily,

but any time you want to talk about my show, I'm in.

Well, you wouldn't let your daughter date an older guy

in the much beloved episode "daddy gets a snake bite."

- Mmm. - But lucky for you,

that older guy saved your life

because he knew how to suck out snake venom.

That episode got a "must see" from Entertainment Weekly.

And in the end, you did the right thing

by letting them go out on a date.

That's a good point, Emily.

And very well played, I might add.

But if I remember correctly, my daughter in the show was 16.

You're 14. Even better played, me.

- Mom. - Okay.

How about we invite this Matthew Pearson over

to meet him and then we decide?

Ugh! That is so old-fashioned.

Before he arrives, will I have time

to churn the butter?

I think it's your best shot and your only shot.

Fine. I'll have him bring toast.

For the butter I'm churning.

Because we're in the '80s.

Hey! The '80s paid for this house!

What are you doing?

Come on, I was doing the signal.

What were you doing? I thought we said no dating.

Honey, if we say no, she's going to sneak around

and see him anyway.

But if we meet him and you act all mean and intimidating,

you'll scare him off for good.

Oh, I see what you're doing here.

Since I'm home, you want me to be the bad cop

so you can be the good cop, right?

Oh, please let me be the good cop.

I've been the bad cop for so long.

You know, I can act mean and intimidating.

Casting directors don't see me that way, but I can do it.

Baby, you can.

Don't mess with me, punk. Huh?

Who could resist that arrest? Come here!

Ho! Is that TV's David Hobbs?

I've got some exciting news for you.

Marcus, why did you write an episode

where my TV daughter dates an older boy?

Now Emily thinks she can date an older boy.

Well, hold on, hold on, hold on.

The daughter in your show was 16

and that boy could suck out snake venom.

That's what I said.

But I still got to meet this kid tonight.

Oh, you know, I'd feel sorry for you

if you didn't lead such a charmed life in every other way.

Now, if it's okay, can we take a moment

when we don't talk about you?

Make it fast.

Check out the "See Dad Run" fan club.

"Fan club presents star David Hobbs and head waiter

Marcus Barnes." And it's sold out.

Man, how about that? "Head Waiter"?

No, it's supposed to say "Head Writer"!

This is worse than the typo they had in Celebrity Weekly

that said I was the show's "Dead Writer."

I forgot about that.

Yeah, well, you go ahead and enjoy that.

But mt wife, she gave me a memorial pool party that night.

That's terrible.

What? You were there.

To celebrate your life.

Hey, dad, can I ask a question at the fan night?

Sure, Joe.

Good, 'cause I'm gonna ask the best question.

Maybe I'll ask a better one.

What are you gonna ask? You're five.

It doesn't matter what I ask. I'm cute.

All right. Baby, what do you want to ask?

Will there be cake?

Well, you might want to ask the head waiter.

Marcus?

Hey, Joe, when Matthew gets here,

could you not wear that cape?

It's kind of embarrassing.

Okay, it's not a cape.

It's a towel for my neck shivers.

I rapidly lose heat through my neck

now that I've lost my baby fat.

Yeah, I'm gonna tell Matthew it's a cape.

Okay, I've got a 20 on Matthew Pearson.

He's coming in five, four, three, two...

Matthew's here!

This is the biggest day of my life!

Everybody act normal and take off your capes!

Wow, this should be good.

Hi, Emily.

Come in, Matthew.

This is my family.

Sorry this is so lame.

I promise it'll be quick.

And, yes, my brother's wearing a cape.

It's an honor to meet you, Mr. Hobbs.

Oh, please. Call me "sir."

Oh, okay, sir.

I hope you like flowers, Mrs. Hobbs.

Oh, why thank you, Matthew.

That's so thoughtful. Thanks.

Aw, rookie mistake. You forgot about Emily.

Actually, I, uh, I brought this one.

Oh.

I guess I sat on it.

Thanks, Matthew.

It smells like French fries.

Yeah, I just came from work.

What is that, a box of drugs?

They're cupcakes for you, sir.

People Magazine says they're your favorite.

Cupcakes, please. What a kiss-up, huh?

This guy.

Actually, Matthew, I'm more of a scone guy, but,

uh, since I'm such a gracious host,

I will try one of your cupcakes.

Ugh!

They're horrible.

Especially the lemon chiffon with the butter cream frosting.

Mmm, oh. I'm so... here, maybe I can return it for some scones.

Well, well, I will figure out a way to get them down.

It's okay.

Okay. These are for you guys.

There's some coupons for some free cheeseburgers.

Ooh, he's a keeper.

I'd rather have a cupcake.

Hey, hey, hey. Back off, sister.

You got a coupon.

Sir, you're as funny in real life

as you are on "See Dad Run."

You watch the show?

Yeah, I've seen every episode.

Oh, yeah, every episode? Which one's your favorite?

Uh, the one where dad gets stuck in the piano.

Hilarious.

Okay. What was that one called?