Mask

How about a kiss in the sun? How about not a kiss in the sun?

Why not? It's very romantic. Oh, Mr. Romance. Great.

Hey, Mom!

- What? - You forgot what we gotta do this morning.

Jesus, who's that? My son. Did I?

The school, the clinic, the blood run. It's today, Mom.

Oh, shit. Wait a second. What's going on?

I gotta do a million things with my kid.

You got things to do? What about us?

We can get together some other time.

What the hell have I been doing for five hours? I don't know.

Wait a minute. Mom.

I'm sorry. Hey, look.

I just gave her a ride home.

Okay, okay. All right.

Hey, Rock. Yo, Red.

This the one you been looking for?

No, I already got two Steve Garveys.

I told you that wasn't the right one. Thanks anyway, Red.

He's trying to find, uh, Ruby Walters.

Rube Walker, card number 108.

108. Brooklyn Dodgers.

1955. Good year. Seems like yesterday.

You say that about everything, Red. Everything does.

I seen you grandstanding for her.

I was protecting her. Where the hell were you? Here comes Mom.

You got the lease? I got everything else. Ah, shit.

I told you it was Rube Walker. You said...

Shut up. Let's get goin'. We're late.

What's the matter? You never saw anybody from the planet Vultern before?

Mom. Beep, beep-beep-beep.

Yes, uh, may...

Never mind. Uh, wait a minute!

Ma'am!

Hi. I'm here to register my son for the ninth grade.

Well, uh, Mrs...

No "Mrs." I'm Rusty Dennis. This is my son Rocky.

Please, sit down.

We're running a little bit late. So could you move it along?

This is a public junior high school, Miss Dennis.

There are special schools...

with wonderful facilities that might be more appropriate for his needs.

Do you teach algebra and biology and English here?

- Of course. - Those are his needs.

Perhaps I should speak to the boy's father.

Perhaps you should speak to the pope too. He'd be a lot easier to find.

Under the circumstances, I do feel that for the good of my students as well as your son,

I'm going to need some additional information...

Mr. Simms, you know what? Don't jerk me around. I'm not in the mood.

I've had a real crappy day so far.

First I find out we're in the wrong school district. I gotta come play pussyfoot with you.

This is a copy of our lease, this is a copy of Rocky's birth certificate,

and this is his last report card from Stevens Junior High School...

where he was in the top five percent of his class.

And I got some additional information for you. My lawyer's name is B.D. Higgins.

He's told me of my rights. If you give me shit, he's gonna drag your ass into court.

Don't worry, Mr. Simms. I look weird, but otherwise I'm real normal.

Everything will be cool.

Thanks a lot. See you next week.

Mom. What?

We have a lawyer named B.D. Higgins? Yeah. Bulldozer.

Come on. Let's get out of here. Hey, you're a lawyer, Doze.

Bullshit rules!

Whoo-hoo!

Cranium circumference: 67 centimeters.

Sixty-seven centimeters.

Last one, kid. Yeah. All right, Billy.

Mandible: 32.5 centimeters.

Mandible: 32.5. That's good news. Let me measure yours.

Rocky, since your last checkup in April,

your jaw measurement only increased 1/8th of an inch.

Wow! I'm cured.

I'm healed. I can go home now. It's the water in Azusa.

Picture time! He knows this routine better than we do.

Oh, wait. Hold on a second. Rocky, you look great.

I wanna get my hair perfect. You look fine, Rocky.

Okay, shoot. Okay.

How's your mom, Rocky? She's great.

Stand still. Oh, sorry.

Turn now. Why don't you fill me in on this, Doctor?

The patient was first diagnosed...

With craniodiaphyseal dysplasia...

at four years of age... You can turn around.

When it was discovered that calcium was depositing at an abnormal rate...

Calcium. My pal calcium. Throughout his skull.

- And what have we learned about this disorder? - It's extremely rare,

one in approximately 22 million births. Twenty-two million.

- How was it first described? - I know.

They call it "lionitis"... means "look of the lion." You new around here?

Yes, I am. Cause? It's caused by two recessive genes...

and happens to the offspring of normal parents.

His mother had an uneventful pregnancy,

didn't ingest any chemical substance or teratogen during gestation.

That means it wasn't my mom or dad's fault.

- Hello, Rocky. - Hey, Doc Rudinsky.

Good to see you again. How's it going?

Our data on this patient supports your article in the New England Journal. ..

How are you feeling today, Rocky? Good. How are you feeling?

Ehh. You still have those headaches?

Yeah. They've been getting pretty bad lately.

Hmm. Is your mother still using the same method? Yeah.

Uh, what methods are those?

Well, she talks to 'em, and they go away.

No medication? Nope.

We're ready now, Doctor. You can get dressed now, Rocky.

See you later, Doc. Do you have any questions?

When you gonna invent one of these things so a guy's rear end isn't always hanging out?

Excuse me. May I see these?

I'd like to do the follow-up counseling with that patient's mother myself.

Now there's a great idea. Wouldn't you agree, Doctor?

Oh, definitely, yes.

Dr. Cameron, pick up line two. Dr. Cameron, line two.

Uh, Mrs. Dennis? What?

I'm Dr. Vinton. I need to talk to you about the test results.

All right. Hey, Mom.

Hey, babe. Why doesn't he wait outside.

What for? So we can talk.

Talk. It's about the test results... on him.

Oh, him. Him, by the way, has got a name,

so if you got some information for him, I suggest you give it to him.

You don't understand. No, you don't understand.

He's got a cheeseburger waiting with his name on it, so I suggest you hurry this along.

Well, as you know, plastic surgery is not an option...

until the skull stops thickening, and there's no evidence that it will.

The cranium is growing at such an accelerated rate,

creating pressure on the spinal cord to such an extent that...

the prognosis is not good.

We, uh, feel that life expectancy is...

Three to six months.

You're not really gonna give us that life expectancy number again, are ya?

You know, for 12 years I've been listening to you guys bullshit.

First you told me that he was retarded, then you said he was gonna be blind and deaf.

Then you told me he'd never be able to do anything regular kids could do.

If I had dug his grave every time one of you geniuses told me he was gonna die,

I'd be eatin' fucking chop suey in China by now.

Anything else?

Bye.

Looks like it's time to get Dozer to give blood.

Take your stick. Never has before.

Here comes Dozer's welcoming committee.

Come on now, Doze. Red Cross needs some blood.

Come on. It's only gonna hurt for a second.

Go on, Dozer! Run!

Hey, Rusty! Look who's here.

The prodigal son returns. Hey, Rocky.

Ben, when did you get back? Yesterday.

He's looking good. Yeah. Better than he acts.

Oh, well. How's your dad?

He was great. Great for you, shitty for me.

Here it goes. Usual crapola's starting. Watch your mouth.

Hey, you got baseball cards. I just started collecting those.

Me too. You did not just start.

You didn't tell me Ben was coming home. It's a surprise to me too.

You happy about it? Not especially. He's acting just like his father.

I think the only reason he's back is his father didn't wanna pay the bills anymore.

Of course, 18 months out of 16 years...

doesn't seem like a hell of a lot to me, but...

Well, who needs them, you know?

If you take their money, you gotta take their shit.

The doctor say the usual? Screw him. He eats everything that ain't tied down.

That Ben's getting a real smart mouth on him.

It's the age. They think they know everything.