Holiday Crashers

Bri, come over here and help me finish these.

Do these mugs look uneven?

They feel uneven.

They're not as uneven as they're gonna be

if I break them all because you won't get over here

and help me finish these.

Come on, it's due by 4:00.

So bossy.

You trying to be manager or something?

Don't curse me.

Oh...

Did you read these?

No, I never read them.

Just put them in the box so they can be delivered

like a robot.

Mm, you gotta hear this one.

Bri...

"Mr. and Mrs.

Charleston David Ashford III

invite you to join us

for a night of Christmas canapés,

caroling, and conversation."

Oh, boy.

Ooh, at least they've got St. Jack-Jean

catering the party.

-"The" St. Jack-Jean? -Yup.

Oh, I bet you there's gonna be great gifts.

I love swag.

It'll be good swag, too.

Trips, electronics, jewelry,

and not just the plated stuff.

Must be nice.

Did you go to a lot of these fancy parties

when you were at Haltward Law?

Enough to know they're all the same.

Hello, Gus.

Either of you got a driver's license?

Does it look like we ride the bus?

Don't answer that.

What's up, Gus?

Delivery guy just called in sick,

and I promised the Ashfords

I'd get them these last-minute invitations out today.

I'll go.

You can drive a van?

Absolutely, Gus.

However,

for safety reasons--

you know,

a woman alone in the city--

it's probably best you send us both.

-Yeah. -Right?

Okay, okay, calm down.

Compo Beach in Westport, Connecticut

is hardly the big city.

Fine,

but no diversions in my van.

I know how you two are.

On it.

She can drive a van, right?

Oh, Bri? Oh, yeah.

She can drive anything.

Uh!

-I got it. -Uh-huh.

At least the bread delivery truck I drove

was automatic.

Who doesn't have automatic anymore?

-Gus. -Gus.

Wait, when did you drive a bread-delivery truck?

Oh, when you were in law school.

Oh. Oh! Brebner's Bread and Buns.

How could I forget?

You were studying.

That I would like to forget.

Oh!

That's a new one.

Are they ever really new?

Oh, I like them.

They make me laugh.

You didn't grow up getting teased for them.

No, I defended you.

Yes, you did.

Okay, we're going into traffic.

Yeah. Okay...

Oh.

-Here we go. -Oh, there we are.

-Ooh! -Great.

Looks like they're having a party.

Great, nice, okay, we made it.

And... stop.

So, did Gus say where to put the invitations?

I think we're supposed to go around back.

We're not the help.

We're not even the help.

We're delivering "to" the help.

Well, I'm not gonna let these fancy-pants people win,

I'm going through the front.

Bri...

-I'm going through the front! -Bri...

Bri! Bri!

Come on!

Bri!

Bri!

-Mm! - Bri!

Don't mind if I do.

-We've gotta get out of here. -Shh!

Oh, gosh, if this is just the dinner party,

imagine what the Christmas party will be like.

Okay, but--

Oh...

I'm so sorry, excuse me.

Did Gus send you?

Oh, yes. Hi.

I'm Toni.

I'm Anita.

Ashford house manager.

Oh, did you want to look at the invitations?

I would.

They're in the foyer.

Thank you.

Excuse me.

Oh!

Oh, I'm so sorry.

No problem.

-Bye. -

Oh, yeah, Formula One

is far better from the pit, trust.

...and then these are for the family.

Oh, excuse me, boys.

Ah, there you are!

Oh, yes. Oh--

-We should go. -Terribly sorry, gotta go.

So many deliveries.

-Thank you! -Thank you so much.

What a rush.

-That was fun, right? -It was kinda fun.

Oh, it's nice to be looked at, not looked past.

Wait, what did you say to those guys?

You had them eating out of your hand.

That I'm a race-car driver.

Formula One, obviously.

Good thing they didn't see you drive the van.

Toni!

Hey, Mom.

He'll be right with you.

-Hey. -Hi.

I saw you two days ago.

I will always be excited to see my baby girl.

He's hangry.

Oh, look.

No!

No, that is not good enough.

Hi!

Abel Keselowski's got four kids,

and now,

because of your client's defective seatbelt,

he's never going to be able to hold those children

in both his arms ever again.

Do you know what it's like

to change a diaper with one arm? Huh?

Or to hang a baby's first Christmas ornament on the tree?

No, I didn't think so.

Look, call me back

when you got a better offer.

Oh, and tell Marla thank you for the gingerbread.

Hey, pumpkin.

What brings you by?

Pastrami on rye. Two pickles.

This could be my last pastrami from Olie's.

What? Are you okay?

Oh, my blood pressure didn't come back too good.

It's this case.

What, someone lost their arm?

Oh, no,

broken elbow,

but those things never heal right.

But, you know, Tone?

This could be my white whale.

This could be the one

that finally puts me in the big time.

-Mm... -No, no, come on, I know,

but this one's different.

This could be a huge class-action suit.

It's Skyline Motors,

and they practically admitted that they knew

that their seatbelts were defective.

I think there could be a--

a-a really big recall coming

soon,

maybe.

Hmm, have you filed?

Oh.

Oh...

It's the sauerkraut.

It never disappoints.