Grey's Anatomy

I don't like questions without any answers,

like "where do we go when we die?"

I mean, I know what happens physiologically speaking,

but beyond that, what really happens?

Anything?

That's what you start asking yourself

when you live on a clock.

All these questions without any answers...

they'll drive you nuts.

That's why I like what I do...

fixing babies, birthing babies.

No ambiguity there, no questions,

just answers... clear, precise, obvious answers.

And life... beautiful new life.

Hope for the future.

God, I miss that.

Morning!

Robbins, are you ever not chirpy?

Does that ever happen?

Are you ever not snarky?

Also, you snore.

I can't crash here again tonight without earplugs.

Okay, so, we have seven cases today.

The first one is in two hours.

Also, it's Friday, so that's MRI day.

You know the drill.

47 minutes of my very limited life-span wasted.

Mm, come on, come on.

God! I'm coming.

- Stop chirping. - Stop snarking.

Whew! After this, we've got the diaphragmatic hernia. Baby's 27 weeks.

We'll do a, um, tracheal balloon occlusion...

Hey. Figured you could use this...

Which should, if we're lucky, ensure the blood...

- before the big lecture. - Oh, um, thanks.

Thank you.

Um, they already scheduled

a follow-up procedure on the baby, as well.

You're cultivating quite a bit of buzz, you know?

- Really? - Mm-hmm.

I heard from two hospitals wanting us to record your talk.

But we won't be too close to the due date.

- And if... - I have a lot on my plate right now,

just with, uh, Herman and her tumor.

Uh, her surgery.

I really need to focus...

On the tumor.

Don't need any distractions, and you're...

Very hard to ignore.

Hey, I ju... It was just coffee.

No, I so appreciate the coffee.

Uh, I was just getting some coffee for myself, and...

It's good coffee. It...

It's great coffee.

I, uh... I can...

I can just get my own if... if you...

I mean, you can get your own so easily.

I don't want to get my own coffee. I...

I mean I do. I can. I will.

I... I can get my own coffee all day long. I just...

Owen.

Thank you for bringing me the coffee.

I really like it.

Uh, you're welcome.

So, how's my head?

The tumor seems stable.

I was worried about the inferomedial margin,

but the good news is, there's no sign of growth.

It hasn't invaded the optic nerve yet.

Well, how long till it does?

I need a number, Shepherd. I have things to plan.

About six weeks... Maybe eight

if you go in for the localized radiation treatments I've prescribed for you.

- I'd like for those to start today. - No, no, no, no.

I tried that. Hated it.

Doctor's orders. It is our best chance

to shrink the part of the tumor on your optic chiasm.

- Oh, crap. - Glenda Castillo!

We're headed to surgery, Dr. Bailey.

No time to talk.

But you haven't given me an answer.

Actually, I have. It was no.

But you haven't given me the right answer.

You could at least meet with her.

I've seen the case, okay?

I'm sorry, but I'm working on a very limited time frame

with a very specific list of surgeries to teach Robbins,

and Glenda Castillo isn't one of them.

Okay, well, as a personal favor to me, just me per...

I have no time to make it personal.

It's a no. I'm sorry.

I'll get you some names... good people.

She can see one of them.

Um, sorry.

Three down, all these to go.

We've got four months' worth of surgeries up here.

I mean, how are we gonna get four months of surgeries done in eight weeks?

We just do, I suppose.

You'll do the next one yourself. I'll watch.

What? No. No, thank you.

I appreciate the vote of confidence,

but I'm not even actually sure that I know how...

I need to see what you've learned,

what you can and can't do on your own

while I'm still around to fix it when you screw up.

Gee, thanks.

It's not a vote of confidence. It's a necessity.

Training wheels are off, Robbins.

Time is up. What's next?

Uh, your radiation treatment.

Ugh. Radiation hasn't worked yet.

I don't see why it's suddenly supposed to start working.

- Radiation is bull... - Shepherd says that it's necessary.

She's the doctor here.

"Life will out."

The origins and lessons of life and evolution

are long and complex,

but what they basically boil down to is, life will out.

Life will always find a way to continue.

Always.

Life... will... out.

This is a massive grade IV astrocytoma.

I want you to take a look at it.

Really look.

Look at its size.

Look at the way it invades healthy tissue.

Look at its vasculature.

It is blood and tissue and flesh.

It's growing...

Adapting to its environment,

struggling to survive, to stay alive.

It is alive.

We don't like to think of it that way, but

it's nested in the womb of a human brain,

feeding on its host, growing and fighting for life...

almost like a fetus.

No, scratch that.

Let's just for science and giggles

say exactly like a fetus.

Because like a healthy fetus, it is thriving.

You know, there are even some types of tumors

that grow teeth, hair...

A stray eye.

Have I repulsed you?

- It's gross, right? - Yeah.

I mean, that is a problem.

Nobody wants something that nasty in their head.

I'd like you for one moment to consider the idea

that, to the tumor, we are the problem,

we are the invader.

We are the danger.

To the tumor, we are the cancer.

And the tumor?

Well, the tumor sees itself as a sweet, cute, fat-cheeked baby

just trying to make its way into the world,

and we want to stop it, destroy it,

tear it from its happy little home like barbarians.

To the tumor,

we are the soulless, murderous monsters.

Why do I do this?

Why do I call it "baby" and talk about killing it?

Because this kind of tumor deserves respect.

It deserves a little humanity.

Charming, isn't it?

They put clouds on the ceiling to distract you.

Least they could do is put something interesting up there,

like porn.

It's not just a tumor.

It's ingenuity.

It's strength.

It's adaptability.

It's poetry.

It's one of God's masterpieces.

It is alive.

Mm.

You okay?

Sure.

And like any living thing, it wants to stay alive.

Like any living thing,

it is going to fight like hell to survive.

And when I saw open that skull and come face-to-face with it,

with that tumor, with that living thing,

it will be almost impossible to remove...

Well, I'll see you after.

Because it would rather destroy the brain that holds it

than go gently into that good night.

It is alive.

And what's it all come down to?

Life...

Will...

Out.

Grey's Anatomy 11x13 Staring at the End

So, our fat-cheeked-baby tumor

that's nestled in that brain,

it's a creature of habit.

It has the same routine day in and day out...

to grow, to spread out, to take up space.

That's it.

At this point, our baby tumor is so enmeshed, so invasive,

it's touching virtually every single brain structure.