Expend4bles

Omar, what's the status on the general?

No?

Hamza.

Where is General Fezzan?

Tell me.

Subtitle by Sailor420

Hope you enjoy the sub/show

I might be complicated, but I ain't fucking hopeless.

Is that what we call it? Complicated?

Well, whatever it's called, it's not working, is it?

Come on, Gina, you're not looking at the big picture.

What's the big picture?

Is it you? Are you my big picture?

Oh, my God, thank you.

You should get the fuck over yourself.

'Cause you know what you actually are?

A caveman.

- You do resemble a caveman. - You know what it is?

- And you don't? - You don't want competition.

Gina, please, calm down. That's what your problem is.

Me calm down? Did you just tell me..

Don't tell me to fucking calm down! I'm calm!

I've never been more fucking calm in my life.

"Oh, look at me.

I'm English. I'm avoidant. I don't like to argue."

Well, guess what?

I just want a little peace in my life. Right?

- It'd be nice. - I'm from America, bitch. We're gonna fight about it.

Go. Just go. Go. So what does that make me?

Does that make me stressful?

No, no, no.

A little violent perhaps.

I'm a professional.

Yeah. And a little violent.

A little bit.

Teeny bit.

You know what it is?

I've got your skills and then some.

And neither of you like it because you're both cavemen.

She's talking to you.

Actually, she's looking in your direction.

- I'm talking to you. - Mm-hmm.

But about you.

You might be my boss,

but I can tell that you're also from this planet called "hopeless"

where intimate relationships and feelings

don't fucking exist!

Fucking baby. I've wasted so much of my life on you.

You are a loser. But I like you.

Thanks. Why are you here?

I lost my ring at this bar, and I need you to..

I'm sorry. Is that it? Are we done talking?

Are you done with this conversation?

Conversation?

It's more like angry chatter.

Fuck you.

She's talking to you again.

It's depressing. No. It's okay.

I liked her, Barney.

She's an Expendable, Christmas.

Look, I got great respect for your uncanny abilities. I really do.

But you are a selfish prick.

Really? We all are.

We have to be to choose this life

over friends, over family.

We do this for money.

That's the definition of prickism.

What do you think of my analysis?

Pretty good?

I think you're a moron.

You don't believe that.

With every cell in my body.

Why are we here?

I lost my ring last night in a bet, and I'm here to try to buy it back.

Seriously?

Yeah, seriously.

A silly little trinket.

I'm superstitious about it, and I like it.

Feel like I'm missing a finger.

I tried getting it back, but this half-ass won't negotiate.

Who? Jumbo Shrimp.

Who's he? You'll see.

- What's up, Barney? - Hey, Billy.

So how'd you lose your most prized possession?

Thumb wrestling.

You mean arm wrestling? No.

I mean thumb wrestling.

Like that. Give me your hand.

No. Thumb wrestling?

You used to be strong. What happened?

And you used to be hairy. What happened?

Things change.

What's up, Barney? Hey, how you doing?

Jumbo Shrimp around?

Is there a problem?

- My friend wants his ring back. - Mm-hmm.

Bet's a bet, man.

You know, no offense, but I'm missing my ring.

It stays where it is.

That's unacceptable.

Striking resemblance.

That's brutal.

- These the guys, Barney? - Yeah.

Now I see why they call him Jumbo.

- No, the other guy, second guy. - Oh.

You lost to Santa's helper?

That's embarrassing.

I was drunk.

Well, you're not drunk now.

Why the fuck am I here?

I hurt my back.

Since when?

A few weeks ago. I can't even lift a fork.

I would do it for you. But if you don't want to do it, I understand.

If you're intimidated...

Intimidated?

Hey, Lee.

Make it easy on yourself.

The classics.

I got this, Thumbo.

Beer, please.

How you doing this nice day?

What do you prefer to be called, "Jumbo" or "Shrimp"?

Call me that again.

Cut your fucking head off.

That's a little harsh, bite-size.

Barney wants his ring back.

What did you call me?

How much for it back, Yoda?

Hey!

It stays here, asshole.

My back.

You see,

what we have here is a matter of humiliation and human kindness.

My friend here loves his ring for all of his stupid reasons.

And it would be very nice and civilized

if you gents would understand that principle.

But since you choose to be..

Barney, what's the word? Obstinate.

Too long.

Dumbbells.

Dumbbells.

You leave me no other choice, dinky.

- You're welcome. - You're slowing down.

My turn, bitch.

Come on, chuck. Come on, cowboy. Bring it.

Get him a beer when he wakes up.

You almost killed me.

I thought you had a bad back.

You know, it's a miracle. It just went away.

You know, I really didn't need this lovefest.

I like spending time with you.

Next time, take me on a pony ride, okay?

Okay.

Overwatch, what is the status?

Sir, there are three soldiers guarding the general.

You're gonna need backup.

I repeat, wait for backup.

What the fuck is he doing?

No, no, no. No, no, please. Please, don't.

What's up, General?

Are my eyes deceiving me? Why?

What's that thing on Gunner's head?

It looks like a sick cat.

Cats are cute.

That looks like tumbleweed.

Hey, good evening, big man.

Let's talk. What's that thing on your head?

Oh, the wig?

Yeah, the wig. Question is, why?

Well, I was chatting with this girl on the Internet

and she likes that '70s look, you know.

The Farrah Fawcett thing.

Got it. You met her yet?

Why.. Why would I do that? I like the mystery.

Understand? Yeah, that makes sense.

Sounds special. It does.

I liked him better when he was a drunk.

I know what you mean. Me too.

I'm happy for you.

Hey, is this the new guy?

Hey, it's Easy Day.

Good man. Ex-special forces.

- Hey, Barney. - Hey, Easy.

This our sniper?

Don't worry about it. I got a prescription scope.

What?

Well, Hawkeyes, remember this face.

Don't shoot it by accident.

You don't have to worry about me.

Who's this guy?

You're slipping, pal.

You hired him. That's Galgo's son.

I have the eyesight, the heart and the sex drive of my father.

Tell me he doesn't talk as much as his father.

He's worse. No.

Twice as bad.

It's gonna be a long trip.

I am Galan.

That suppose to mean something?