See Dad Run

Katie, honey, it's dad.

Oh, I can't believe... Ooh...

That you're leaving for college next week.

So many memories.

Come on, let me see that sweet face.

Come on.

Now I'm reminded of your birth.

My life is over.

Baby, I know you thought you and Chad

would be together forever.

But I promise you there's one guy

that will always be there for you no matter what.

I love you, daddy.

Oh, wait. You thought I was talking about me?

This is awkward.

And... We're out!

Give it up for the one, the only,

America's number-one dad, David Hobbs!

Thank you, ladies and gentlemen.

Uh...

Boy, this show has been my life

for the past ten years, and to tell you the truth,

I can't believe it's over.

This cast and crew have been like my family, except better,

because I don't have to see them on weekends and holidays.

- One more season! - You're the best!

I will... I'll miss them more than they will ever know.

We love you, David!

Get out of here.

This is the guy right here.

Ladies and gentlemen, this is my dear friend

and our head writer, Mr. Marcus Barnes.

Marcus...

I just want to take a moment and tell you something

that I've been dying to tell you for a long time.

I quit!

Too late. You're fired!

Well, folks, as bittersweet as this is,

I'm really looking forward to spending some quality time

with my real family.

And if you don't mind, I'd love you to meet them.

Come on out here, real family.

My beautiful wife, Amy, and our kids.

Great news, guys... daddy's coming home.

I can't believe it's over.

Well, honey, it's time to move forward,

start act two.

Speaking of, uh, act two,

there's something I need to talk to you about.

Is this about me?

Isn't it always?

Hey, baby.

Janie, honey, I thought you were asleep.

Dr. Monkey Chunks told me she's sad.

Oh. Did daddy forget to kiss Dr. Monkey Chunks good night?

- Uh-huh! - Aw.

That's 'cause Dr. Monkey Chunks

smells like poo.

That's all you got?

Lame. - Ah.

Hey, guys.

I wanted to practice my part in the school play before bed.

Oh. Hail Caesar!

David, that was his part.

Ooh!

Sorry, Joe. I really want to hear it from you.

Hail Caesar!

Whoa! And there it is.

That's my boy!

In ancient Rome, they never wore underpants.

You know, he's right, honey.

All romans went full commando...

Claudius, Julius, Testiculus.

Okay, good night, Joe.

Ah, so, Mr. David, I have some exciting news.

You're not pregnant, are you?

No!

Whoo!

I, uh...

Got a call from the producers of All The Days.

They want my character, Sarah, to come back.

Come back from what, her coma?

Yeah, they feel it's time to end that storyline.

Doesn't her lack of brain activity end that storyline?

They want my character to wake up,

rejoin the show.

Oh. I don't know, Amy. The timing's not great.

How do you figure?

Well, doesn't that mean that you'd be working full-time,

and I'd be staying home with the kids?

Yeah!

I just thought we'd all be together...

having breakfast in the morning,

you dropping the kids off at school,

me playing a round of golf and smoking cigars with the guys,

spending the afternoon at the track...

With you.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, it does sound pretty ridiculous, huh?

Ha! Leaving you home with the kids.

Hold on a second.

You don't think I can handle my kids on my own?

- I never said that. - But that's what you meant.

- No, I didn't. - That's exactly what you meant.

Need I remind you that just last year

I was voted TV Guide's number-one dad?

Baby, I voted for you.

You're going back to work, okay?

I got this. - Really?

Am I not the man who built his son's science project

and delivered a litter of puppies all in one night?

That was on the show.

- Really? - Mm-hmm.

But I like where you're going with this, mister.

Come on, you know what? Come here.

It's your turn. You deserve this.

And besides, you had them for the "diaper" years.

I mean, how hard can this be?

You're so pretty.

- Can I talk to you, mom? - Sure, baby, yeah.

What's up?

Oh, it's about Matthew Pearson.

Oh, that's my cue. I'm out of here.

Oh, no, no, no, honey.

You need to be a part of this now.

But, mom!

Go ahead, love.

Fine.

Um, well, you know that I was hoping...

- And did he? - No! I can't believe it!

- Even after... - I know, I know.

But tell me you didn't... No! I did exactly what we...

- Good, good. Did you try... - Twice!

- And not even a... - Nope.

Oh, wow.

David, you want to jump in here? - On what?

You guys sound like a cell phone that keeps cutting out.

See? I knew he wouldn't understand.

Can I buy a vowel or something?

Now that I'm going back to work

and you're in charge,

you need to know how to handle these situations.

Wwwait. You're leaving, and he's staying?

He doesn't know anything about raising a daughter.

I think Entertainment Weekly might disagree with you on that.

Fine.

I'm trying to get a guy to ask me to the dance.

Any words of wisdom?

Did you not see our very special prom episode?

Nothing good ever happens at a dance.

You're not going.

Unbelievable!

Yeah, see that?

This is gonna be awesome!

Morning, family. How's everybody today?

- Horrified. - Me too.

So you heard the good news.

- I think it's great, dad. - Me too.

Now we get some "dudes only" time.

Dude, we are gonna have all kinds of "dudes only" time,

starting right now... catch.

Daddy, we don't throw things to Joe.

David, we really need to go over a few things

before I leave.

One sec, honey. I just need my coffee.

There we go.

Morning.

Hello, David.

Hello, David's real family.

- Thank you. - No problem, dad.

Uh, uh, David.

David, what was Kevin from the show doing here?

Bringing me my scone.

Scone... okay.

Uh, it's 6:45.

At 7:00, the kids need to be upstairs...

teeth, hair, faces, brushed, combed, washed.

You prep the backpacks, and you make the lunch.

Now, this is important.

Emily only eats out of recyclable containers.

Joe's food can't touch. Don't ask.

You're driving carpool.

Leave at 7:30 because Joe cannot be late.

You won't like Joe when he's late.

What do I do with Janie?

- You take her with you. - All day?

Oh, honey, I think I see where you've gone wrong here.

You golf?

Ah. This is the family book.

How many families are in this thing?

Do not mock the family book.

The family book is your best friend.

Everything you need is right here.

- Honey, honey? - Huh?

- I got this. - Mm-hmm.

- Okay? Come on. - Mommy, don't go!

Please don't leave us with daddy!

Not funny, Emily.

Too much?

- Dad! It's 7:29!

I can't be late! I can't be late!