Wonder Woman

Enter, Mariposa.

The good old U.S. of A.

The scenery, beautiful as ever.

What was it General MacArthur said?

"I have returned."

First...

So as not to spoil my homecoming...

I think I'll send a little box of candy...

to my old friend Diana Prince.

Some bomb-bombs.

Wonder Woman

Wonder Woman

Wonder Woman

Get us out from under

Wonder Woman

Wonder Woman

Wonder Woman

Hello, Mom? Yeah, this is Bill.

No, nothing's wrong. No.

No, I got a message to call you from this phone booth.

Yeah, it did sound kind of crazy.

You didn't?

Welcome to Mariposalia, Bill Berthoud.

Behave yourself...

And nothing will happen to you or your dear mother.

I wasn't expecting you. What do you think?

You really swing.

What does that mean?

Nothing. Everything. I don't know.

Nadia, marry me.

Not right now.

- What is it? - I don't know.

You seem frightened. You always seem frightened.

- Because I am. - Why?

Baby, it's been over a year since you defected.

The spies, the secret police, they're ancient history now.

Not for me.

I know you think I'm paranoid but...

I am being followed

wherever I go, and it's not the secret police.

Put an end to the paranoia then. Marry me.

You're not listening to me.

Okay, who do you think is following you?

I don't know.

Nadia Samara.

She is absolutely the finest?

Top pick, AP, UPI, and Reuters.

Gold medals in Amsterdam, Zurich, Johannesburg...

Pan-American Games, Scandinavian Games.

None better.

She defected a year ago.

That's her boyfriend.

They're getting married.

A guaranteed gold medal?

A guaranteed Olympic champion?

No guarantees.

You've read her stats. She's the best in the world

at this moment, but no guarantees.

She's breaking training, Eric.

Bring her in. It's time she joined our team.

You said the meeting was urgent. You said nothing about formal.

You're dressed just fine for what you'll be doing tonight.

Uh-oh. Something tells me

that I'm not going to spend the weekend at home in front of my fireplace.

That's right. Two things. First...

Marion Mariposa is back.

- How did you know that? - He sent me a little present.

- The hello-goodbye type. - What?

It was nothing I couldn't handle. What's second?

Second...

You recognize any of these athletes?

By reputation.

You know what they have in common, other than the obvious?

Breakfast cereal.

Seriously. They're all missing.

The Olympic Committee came up with an "address unknown"

on all of these people.

None of them have signed their letter of intent.

Someone's undermining the Olympics?

It looks that way.

Okay, where do I start?

All the missing athletes were in or around the Los Angeles area

when they disappeared.

Here are your tickets. Flight leaves at 6:00 am.

And all this time, I thought you were going to invite me to the ball.

Well...

That'd be nice, but...

But I got hooked into escorting a Lithuanian countess

to the Senate dance tonight.

Oh, poor you.

I've seen that Lithuanian countess. She's gorgeous.

I really am late, Diana.

I'll have more for you on this tomorrow.

I'll talk to you then. Bye.

Good night.

What is your problem?

A number of future Olympic game competitors can't be located.

Mino Gallegos. Arthur Lopez. Medora Ritoli. Bill Berthoud.

Spyros Voker. Regis Crawford.

Thank you, Ira.

My assignment is to locate these men and women.

I do not know where they are. But I do know who will disappear next.

Who?

Nadia Samara.

The gymnast who defected? I met her in Munich.

Her disappearance will have nothing to do with her defection.

What will it have to do with?

Insufficient data prevents me from knowing the reason.

Okay, Ira. Thank you anyway. Good night.

Please give my regards to Wonder Woman, Diana Prince.

Wrist down, fingers high.

Elbows in, back straight.

Wrist down, fingers high. Good.

Your Excellency.

I take it you've lowered the flag, Eric.

It's right here.

- Folded it properly? - Just like you told me.

Hmm. Good.

Is there some trouble with the recruits, Eric?

Nothing out of the ordinary.

Then why are you hovering?

I just heard an ugly rumor about Diana Prince.

The late Diana Prince, you mean.

No, I'm afraid I don't.

I told you it was ugly. Somehow she survived the bomb.

Ms. Prince's ability to survive dire circumstances

is surpassed only by mine.

Her presence continues to complicate matters.

The people coming in tomorrow can handle her.

I'm told they're tops in their field.

Which is?

Disposal.

Well put, Eric. Well put.

So I said, "I can't be in the cafeteria baking cookies

and run the booth at the same time."

Anyway, who would I get for a babysitter?

I just don't let anyone watch my kids, you know.

- You got kids, Diana? - No.

Oh, thanks. Hold this, please.

Thank you very much.

Well, it certainly has been a pleasure talking to you, Lois.

Say, you, too, honey. Oh, say, your bag's not down yet, huh?

- No. - Oh...

- Someone meeting you? - No.

- You want to share cab fare into town? - I'm renting a car.

Oh, terrific!

Hey. Listen, why don't you give me a lift? I just live in the Valley.

I'm going downtown.

Oh, what a shame. I could have shown you the way.

Los Angeles is my town, you know.

Seventeen, I used to stop traffic.

Now I'm lucky if I don't get run over.

- Well, bye. - Bye.

You and your partner come very well recommended.

Well, we believe the only good customer is a satisfied one.

We're also told your services are expensive.

It's a seller's market, isn't it?

I mean, if you can find somebody

more qualified and less expensive to do the job,

you'd hire them, but you won't. Because there's not.

Higher. Higher.

$50,000. $25,000 in front

and $25,000 when we deliver.

Oh, yes.

No problem.

Anyone you hire will have to come out of your end.

The price includes everything...

Or, anything as the case may be.

I'm glad you said that.

We've learned that the I.A.D.C. has begun to show interest.

Yes.

I believe they've sent Diana Prince to protect the little lady.

And what will you do about it?

Kill her.

Still here, Mr. Taggart?

Didn't Eric tell you I expect you to carry out my assignments immediately?

He made it perfectly clear you wanted no mistakes.

My assistant had to make certain arrangements.

If you'll forgive me for asking,

what's a guy like you want with all these athletes anyway?

Guy?

Did you call me "guy"?

I am royalty.

The emperor of a great country.

Mariposalia.

This globe... This tiny little globe

will show you the esteem with which

the international community holds my country.

Mariposalia isn't there.

Can either of you tell me the colors of Mariposalia's national flag?

Can you hum our national anthem?

Why is it that when the United Nations

sits to ponder the problems of the world...

my ambassador's microphone is never working? Hmm?

Why is it that the world knows how much wheat,

how many peanuts the United States has to export each year?

And yet no one can tell you what my country has to offer.

Why? Why is that? Tell him, Eric!

- Public... - Relations.

Public relations.