Mere Dad Ki Maruti

Excuse me, mister, please take me to sector 9.

It's so hot.

It's Raj.

Baby, why are you travelling in a rickshaw?

It's thanks to Sameer! He's such an ass.

He was supposed to pick me up from the salon two hours ago...

and as usual he's ditched me.

Why am I not surprised?

He's got no control over his raging hormones.

Anyway, I was wondering...

for the wedding, should I keep an Iron Man frenchie

or a Dabaang moustache?

What do you think?

Baby!

On our wedding night I'm not interested in getting acupressure done.

Ok... tell me, how are the wedding preparations going?

Mom has turned into Lady Gaga

and is driving everyone crazy with her policing.

And you know how dad is...

I think he's negotiating discounts even in his sleep!

In short our Khullar house has turned into a complete madhouse!

Excuse me, are these decorations worthy of a bungalow in Sector 9?

Is my only daughter getting married using plastic chairs at her reception?

Obviously not, right?

Make sure I don't see them in Shivalik Farms or else!

Come on, get on with it!

Dear God! Stop will you!

How many times do I have to repeat myself?

You have to start playing the dhols just when the car arrives!

Not before... enough already.

Tanvi, my baby.

I sent Sameer to pick you up hours ago.

Morning, aunty.

I really think you should be very strict with Sameer.

See how he's left Tanvi stranded yet again.

By the way, Tanvi darling, did Sameer tell you where he is?

Go!!!! Step on it, dude!

Thanks for embarrassing me.

I wish I could drive all day

I wish I could make you sit next to me all day.

Change the track, turn up the sound.

Change my gear, let's go round.

Don't say that, thought you was down.

Oh.

Everyone's fond of her.

Oh.

Everyone loves her.

Oh.

Everyone worships her.

Everyone takes care of her.

Oh.

She is so beautiful.

Oh.

She fills my heart.

Oh.

She is one of a kind.

She is so smart.

Oh.

Oh.

She's sexy right.

Oh

I'm feeling that.

Oh.

She's sexy tight.

Oh

I'm feeling that.

Oh.

You feeling that.

Oh

I'm feeling that.

Oh.

Everyone's fond of her.

Oh.

Everyone loves her.

Take a drive in the sunshine.

Look at this city, it's all mine

I got the big doh on it.

And the ladies want it.

It's the capital city.

So beautiful, not nitty gritty

I put my foot down on it.

Mohali chronic.

Pound for pound.

Now we're racing with some clowns.

Put your arms up for the clouds.

Girl, have no doubt.

Oh.

She's sexy right.

Oh.

Am feeling that.

Oh.

She's sexy tight.

Oh

I'm feeling that.

Oh.

You're feeling that.

Oh

I'm feeling that.

She's sitting tight, next to me.

She's flying high, next to me.

Ohh...

This bike is heavy duty.

Ohh...

Everyone's fond of her.

Ohh...

She's a beauty.

Ohh...

She's a beauty.

Ohh...

Ohh...

Pick up the speed.

Pick up the speed.

Ride the breeze.

Pick up the speed.

Pick up the speed.

Pick up the speed.

Ride the breeze.

Pick up the speed.

Everyone's fond of her.

Oh.

Everyone loves her.

Everyone worships her.

Oh.

Everyone takes care of her.

Oh.

She is so beautiful.

Oh.

She fills my heart.

Oh.

She is one of a kind.

She is so smart.

Oh.

Jackass, you have five hundred thousand missed calls from your dad.

And by now he must have called my house!

And you know how crazy my dad gets when he switches into his army mode...

He's going to kick my ass thanks to you.

Gattu my bro, have you ever wondered why your name rhymes with Fattu.

Sameer my bro, have you ever wondered

why your Tej is always hunting for you?

You know Tej, don't you?

Come here.

Should I slap you?

Dog.

Right or left?

Come lick my shoe.

Stupid buffoon.

Why you keeping quiet?

Bloody Idiot.

Why the hell are you quiet?

You want a slap?

You shut up and answer me.

Eat shit.

You want to eat shit?

Shalu, give him a plate of shit.

Wow, you really made me proud today!

Beating.

Sameer...

Idiot.

Sameer...

Get out.

Sameeeeeeeeer!

Sameer! You stupid buffoon.

Are you dead? Where the hell are you?

You come here right now!

Where have you been loafing around this time?

Moron.

Come here, I said!

Dad, I'm not coming.

You're only interested in squeezing my ears

and making a lemonade for yourself.

Come on Teju, we are all getting ready for a wedding! Please let it go.

Is he doing his board exams that I should let it go?

Useless burger.

Dad, it's bugger, not burger.

Shut up. So now you're going to teach me English are you?

I told you ten times to go and pick up my trousers from the tailor.

Did you do it?

Now am I to wear boxers under my jacket and prance around?

Give me the receipt.

What receipt?

You good-for-nothing!

Sameer, you go and pour oil in the lamps.

From one side to the other.

Go, son! Quickly!

Shalu, where the hell did you produce him from?

I'm sure he got switched in the hospital.

He loses everything! Why don't you get lost sometimes?

Please will you do that for me?

Now I know why some animals eat their own children!

Gross.

Bloody dog. I waited for two hours in the parlour for you.

Why are you getting so excited?

Are you getting married today? Are you?

Thank god I'm getting married and moving out.

At least I won't have to see your ugly face every day in the morning.

Oh shut up! Have you ever taken a good look at your ugly face in the mirror?

Bloody dog!

Moron!

- Go to hell! - You go to hell!

Kuljit, did you go all the way to South India to get me one coconut?