South Park

* i'm going down to south park *

* gonna have myself a time *

* friendly faces everywhere *

* humble folks without temptation *

* going down to south park *

* gonna leave my woes behind *

* ample parking day or night *

* people spouting "howdy neighbor" *

* headin' on up to south park *

* gonna see if i can't unwind *

* tim-Tmah tim-Mah, tim-Mah tim-Mah timmy tim-Mah *

* so come on down to south park *

* and meet some friends of mine *

Okay, now put on the nose, tweek.

I can't! You do it!

Just stick it on!

But what if i put it in the wrong place?

Just put it between its eyes!

Agh! But what if while i'm putting on the nose,

The snow man comes to life and tries to kill me?

Tweek, when has that ever happened

Except for that one time?

Yeah!

Hey fellas!

Oh, hey butters.

How are things going with your new best friend?

Well, tweek's okay,

But he's certainly no kenny!

Agh!

Yeah, but he's still better than you, butters.

Well, that's good.

Good luck being their new friend, tweek.

Hopefully you'll do better than me.

See ya, fellas.

Oh man, that is way too much pressure!

You guys! You guys!

You're not gonna believe it!

Uh, oh.

Everything's gonna be okay, you guys!

Life isn't so crappy after all!

It's not?

No, i was looking in this magazine,

And i found an ad for little ocean creatures

That you can buy and raise in your room!

No way.

Look!

Sea people.

You keep them in a big tank of water,

And they build castles and play basketball and stuff.

Nuh-Uh.

Yeah!

And they ride around on turtles

And they play games with fish!

No way.

Okay, kyle, you're being a negative nancy, stop it.

Unless you want everyone to call you negative nancy from now on.

Now, what we need is to all chip in $4.00

And we can have them here tomorrow.

Only $16.00?

They can't be cool if they're only $16.00.

If nancy doesn't want to chip in,

Then it will be $5.35 per person.

Alright, i'll chip in.

Agh, me too!

Oh, alright.

Butters, don't forget dinner is in two hours!

Okay, mom.

I'm just gonna be up here doin' my homework.

Yes, by day he's mild-Mannered, sweet and innocent butters!

But nobody knows that he is actually his dark underside!

Professor chaos!

Ha-Ha, time to wreak havoc on the world that shunned me!

Ha ha... ha ha...

Professor chaos!

Ah, my faithful companion in world destruction,

General disarray!

I have done as you asked

And brought the first load of scrap wood!

Excellent, general disarray!

Now we can begin my most horrible, evil plan yet

To wreak havoc on humanity!

What dastardly deed are we doing now?

Simple, my dear general...

We are going to block out the sun!

Whoa!

I have plotted for weeks

And figured that if we build a huge wooden shade

80 feet high and 50 feet wide

Precisely on this hill,

South park will forever be cast in a great shadow!

Oh, awesome!

Soon all people will have to live like moles!

They will live only to remember with sorrow

How great the sun used to be!

Ha ha ahaaaaa!

Cool, it'll be just like on 'the simpsons'!

Huh?

They did that on 'the simpsons'.

I think it was the mr. Burns character,

He tried to block springfield from the sun.

He did?

Aw heck, i thought i was being original.

So how do we build it?

Aw, i don't wanna do it now.

Not if they already did it on 'the simpsons'.

Now i gotta think of something else...

Goddammit, how come every time i think of something clever

'The simpsons' already did it?

Sea people...

Coming in the mail tomorrow...

Yes... yes...

* look at me, i'm living free *

* free and clean amongst the sea people *

* we look for pirates, and search for gold *

* life is an adventure with the sea people *

* they don't ever complain

* they don't call me fat *

* they don't make me do homework *

* or nothing like that

* this is the way life was meant to be *

* laughing and singing

* the sea people and me *

* sea people and meeeeee *

Wow, only 3 more hours, sea people-

Only 3 more hours and you can take me away

From this crappy goddamn planet full of hippies.

Okay, i've added the water purifier tablet

To the "sea people kingdom tank".

Now, it says "step 2...

"Add the sea people eggs to the water

You will see sea life spring instantly."

Okay, let's just run through this one more time.

When the sea people arrive,

I will welcome them south park as ambassador of earth.

Tweek, you give them the key to the city,

And we'll all engage them in simple, conversation.

We've got to make the sea people feel comfortable, ready?

Ready, let's see 'em.

Hold the sign up, kyle!

Higher, kyle!

Okay...

Here we go...

Are they playing basketball?

What the f- Is this?

Hey, these are brine shrimp.

I used to feed them to my fish.

I got ripped off!

I told you, cartman-

Oh shut up, kyle!

Shut your goddamn jew mouth!

You people are why there's war in the middle east!

And you, tweek, why don't you learn to button your shirt right for once!

You're as bad as stan with his stupid girlfriend

Always spending time with her!

God, i hate you guys!

They were supposed to take me away to their underwater kingdom!

They were supposed to take me on adventures of the deep!

They package brine shrimp and sell them to kids?

That's not right, man!

What are we gonna do with them?

Who cares, throw them away!

Let's pour them in the teacher's coffee tomorrow morning!

Yeah, that'd be funny!

Huh-Huh, okay!

Alright, listen to me.

We must take a strict vow of silence.

Jesus christ, we killed her!

Shhh, tweek shut the hell up!

General disarray, are your parents home? No.

I've done it, general disarray!

I've completed my most horrible deed to date!

What?

You know the big statue in the town square

Of pioneer john wesley powell?

I snuck over there with a hacksaw

And i cut off his head!

Ha ha! Oh... uh-

They're probably just realizing it now!

Quick, we must turn on the news!

...but hillary clinton's ass just keeps getting bigger.

Also in the news tonight

A vandal has apparently cut off and stolen

The head of the powell statue in the south park town square!

Look! Look!

I made the news!

I've wreaked havoc!

The head was taken in the early morning hours,

And the police have no leads!

I finally made the world sorry!

I brought sadness and chaos!

This act reminded all of us of the time

That bart simpson took the head of the springfield statue

In one of their classic episodes.

Here's what some people had to say.

Well, i think whoever took the head

Was really just doing an homage to the simpsons

And i think it's great!

Yes, it really made me reflect on that episode and laugh!

The simpsons is such a great show

And we need reminders like this to keep us watching!