Demonte Colony (டிமான்டி காலனி)

Good morning, sir

Air of festivity, wherever the movie was screened

True, add this line next

Creating a sensation in every single region

So what if it's only the 2nd day

Only we should boost our film

Start a controversy in Facebook and Twitter

Pack up the old bandicoots

Are we running a home for the aged?

Have you come to narrate a story?

In those days directors Bharathiraja and Bhagyaraj...

...will narrate their stories to me

You go inside, sir

He's a pest of the first order!

You asked me to come and narrate my story

Did I tell you to come today?

Please sit

If the movie isn't doing well...

...random strangers tear us apart

Is this your story?

Of course, sir

Because tomorrow some chap shouldn't sue me...

...claiming it's his story just before release

I won't have money then to defend

Okay, what's the title?

'De Monte Colony'

'In 19th century in Alwarpet, Chennai...'

'...lived John De Monte a wealthy business tycoon'

He suddenly shoots with a gun

Building blasts, sir Suddenl-

That's enough, stop

You said it's a small budget film

But now you say it's a period film

Building blast

All that can be done with graphics, sir

Is graphics done in MGR market free of cost?

Have you seen their charges?

A snake attacking its prey costs 1.5 million

It all works out the same

Is this a true story?

No, sir

De Monte colony actually exists, sir

I made a script with the stories I heard

Plus my own imagination

God knows what you did!

Do you have a comedy script?

What kind of story?

Absolutely no story!

Throughout the film, hero and comedian should talk nonstop

Viewer shouldn't be able to guess...

...who is the hero and who is the comedian

Audience should roll on the floor with laughter

With pretty girls in skimpy dresses dancing

I want 5 song situations

"If life becomes dummy, to no avail"

"Even Jimmy will stop wagging his tail"

"If you're a burden to your mummy and daddy"

"...you'll run out of luck even in a game of rummy"

A girl screams out 'God will come to save me'

Suddenly someone jumps through the thatched roof

A big blast

Slowly the camera pans-

Bro, tea and cigarette

Fix the shot

We pull back

We show the hero

How's the suspense?

Wowww!

Awesome, huh?

Thank you

Who do you have in mind to play the hero's role?

I'm thinking of doing it myself, boss

- What, boss? - Nothing

'Lady Luck has lost it!'

Let me tell you the love scene

We show a cute and bubbly heroine

She whizzes in riding a yellow scooter, without even removing its stand

Mom...?

What?

What is it?

Hey! Sajith

Which fan did I ask you to fix here?

Brown fan, madam

Are you deaf or what?

Fix the white fan right away

Let me get hold of the watchman

His reference sucks!

We've come to install your TV

Don't turn on the switch

I don't know if I can trust him

Why did you do that?

How sad, nothing happened

Can you come here?

Coming, sir

What, sir?

Drill 4 holes where I've marked

- Got it? - Okay, sir

Come here

Go there

Who will fix that fan?

Do you know the job or not?

Don't step into this house

How can you be so useless?

I finished all the work, madam

What about the plug point?

I fixed it

How much should I pay you?

Rs 700 for the materials

Rs 700 for labor, madam

For the kind of job you did 1400 is way too much!

Round it up to Rs 1000

Madam, I've also fixed the wiring for the air conditioner

- Madam? - Yes

Installation charges Rs 1500

'He charges 1500 for just lifting a TV set and fixing it?'

"This dumbass donkey dilly dallying with Inky or Pinky"

"He's worthless and wimpy"

"Self respect and dignity are off on a vacation happily"

"Waste product in totality"

"Even the mosquito, dude will think twice to bite you"

"Gone for a toss"

Tell me, Sappai

Vimal, a little while ago Raghavan called me

But his phone is switched off now

He called me too

I spoke with him

I believe he's going directly to the room

- You join him - Okay, Vimal

More than enough for this nitwit

Bend lower

Let me kiss you now

I gave you, right?

It's your turn now

I was so sweaty I removed my vest

Aren't you sweating?

Hey!

Gawd! He's looking at her

He's looking at me too

What are you up to?

Drying my clothes!

Go away, boss

How indecent can you be!

Be fair, boss

Did I peek into your cabin?

You're the peeping Tom!

You came, you saw

Now please go, boss

Dai! Get lost

You and your scarecrow body

Clear out!

Baby, too many cockroaches

My privacy!

Wolf in a sheep's clothing drooling over my girl!

Get lost

Tell me, Vimal

Hey! Sappai Where are you?

Didn't you hear your phone ring?

I'm in the room

I fell asleep Tell me

You'll give a complex to RipVan Winkle

Is Raghavan there?

He said he was bugged

And he went upstairs

I'm feeling the same way too

Both of you come to the wine shop

I'll meet you there

Okay, Vimal

Hey, I've bought petrol

It's near the fridge

Bring it with you

Raghava, Vimal called just now

He asked us to meet him at the wine shop

Shall we go?

I'm going out tonight regarding some work

You carry on

What's so important?

You can run your errand later

Don't act pricey

Why are you pushing your bike?

No petrol, dude

Sappai, hand me the petrol can

Ooops! I forgot, Vimal

Don't know what you'll do

Push the bike till our room

Keep this inside

Sappai, give me money

I don't have any money on me

Neither do I

Why did you guys come to drink without money?

Go to the curb and talk

Even toddlers are making a beeline to wine shops

I wonder who will save our country

"Rakamma, clap your hand"

"Tune a song by waving your wand"

"Night bird, beat the drum, start"

"Touch a chord in this king's heart"

Yes, Vimal

Srini, where are you?

I'm here

You mean in Jillu's house?