Hustle

Taking me to see basketball or a cockfight?

We do everything.

Okay.

Big boy.

He's coming.

Do we back up? He's gonna take us out.

Oh-oh!

Uh-huh. What? What did he say?

He wants to go to the NBA.

- Yeah, that's why we're here. - Mm-hmm.

Very impressive. Tell him.

Just a big man who makes shots.

He would be in the rotation right now.

And be a force, he would be a powerhouse in the league.

I do have to ask something.

So it says in my files, you're 22 years old.

Da. Da.

- Yeah. - It's accurate? You're 22 years old?

Yes, I'm 22 years old.

The reason I'm asking… He's speaking English?

- Yeah. - You understand my English?

Because you can't be in the draft if you're over 22,

if you're from overseas. Do you have a birth certificate?

It was big fire.

Oh. Okay.

- Who's this? - It's my son.

- It's your son? - Yes.

- How old is he? - He's ten years old.

He's ten years old. Okay. Okay.

What was going on on defense?

Did you smoke a little before the game?

A little bit. Okay.

NBA, we need defense. You know that.

I know. Okay.

- Hey, pretty lady. - Where are you?

I'm in Greece enjoying the local cuisine. It's very good.

Babe, you're killing yourself.

Yeah, that's the idea. I love you, I'll see you soon.

Hey, Bubba.

Dad, when I said I didn't get geometry,

I didn't want you to email my teacher. So embarrassing.

How about you? You wanna play basketball?

Stanley, you know how many scouts have come to see Haas play?

We would love to see him go to the Sixers.

Embiid. Maxey. Harris. Haas.

Dynasty. No?

I like the sound of that. Sure.

Haas! Haas!

The local time is-42 a.m.

For those of you returning home to Philadelphia, welcome back.

- Hey, Stan. - Hey, guys.

Good to see ya.

- Yeah. Who you've been dating? - Yeah. Come on, Dad.

- You're not dating? - I'd never tell you who I was dating.

- Just a second. - Okay.

Hi. Wow, you look tired.

- I had a red-eye. - How was the German MJ?

I'm about to get into all that. You're not staying?

I have an-30 call with Adam Silver.

You didn't like the kid?

Oh… shit.

Good luck, Sugerman.

Please don't go.

Okay. Goodbye.

Kid can score at will. Makes shots from all over the floor.

A match-up nightmare.

His true shooting percentage, same as Steph's was at Davidson.

- You're taking it too far. - He's just reading the stats, Billy.

I think Doc will like the way this kid can pass.

You've seen him pass before? I've never seen him pass.

He's playing with scrubs. His best chance to win is to shoot.

With us, he'll adapt.

We've done the modeling. He checks every box.

In three years he could be an All-Star.

Rex, you want to win now, or in three years?

- We want to win now. - Yeah…

Offensively, there's a lot to like, but I don't think--

So what's not to like, Stanley?

Berlin loses a lot.

Three games this guy didn't show up to, they won.

They're better off when he's on the bench.

You check out the efficiency stats I sent?

- I actually have the stats, Stan. - Thank you.

Everyone in Germany is saying this guy'll be the next Dirk.

Dirk never left the gym. This guy shows up late to warm-ups.

The kid can defend all five positions.

He's physically capable of it. He just gets bored out there.

I've been to Germany four times in the last two months.

I've yet to see him make a third effort.

He's late on rotations.

Always bitching at refs, bitching at teammates.

He's bitching because he cares. He wants to win.

We've all seen the tape.

Referring to the highlights his mother put together?

Like the Bargnani tape you tried to trade up with?

- That's too soon. - Shit.

Listen, Dad, he's a 19-year-old, 7-footer with a 35-foot range and a guard's handle.

I see him in another team's jersey, I'm gonna goddamn kill someone.

Yeah.

Cool.

- Yes, sir. - Get in.

Okay.

So, I'm not drafting Haas.

Your son's gonna kill somebody.

Yeah, maybe you.

You shouldn't have backed down to him.

No, no, no, I didn't.

I didn't back down. I was just trying to save everybody some time.

I remember when you were at Temple.

I think it was the second game of the season,

and we were playing Saint Joe,

and some guy took Leon's knees out.

Marlon Daly. I can't believe you remember that.

I remember you knocking him into the second row

and then having to be held back from fighting that entire team.

That's the reason I brought you in, because you never took anybody's shit.

Rex, you're right. I should have pushed back more.

I'm sorry, it won't happen again.

No, it won't.

Karl, could you pull around to the back, please?

After I bought the team,

this was before your time,

I gave this office to my Uncle Connie.

He helped out with everything,

worked every day.

Sorry, I didn't make it happen for you sooner.

I know it's not on the bench, but it's behind the bench.

So what do you think?

I can't believe you made your uncle work in this closet.

Thank you.

Feels like I've been waiting my whole life to become a coach.

Come here.

Come.

Never back down.

- Yes, sir. - All right?

- I won't. - Yeah. Yeah.

Right.

Look at the berries.

You need to zoom out so they can see the whole thing.

Mom, no one uses filters.

I can't eat that whole cake.

Looks like you already did.

Wow, what a lovely welcome home. I missed you guys too.

Welcome back. Welcome back. Okay.

Not a side hug. What's with the side hug? When did you stop hugging me?

Honey, you gotta be more gentle.

- Your baby's got titties now. - That's disgusting.

I don't want to hear about that. That's between you two.

Dad, can I go to the cemetery tonight? They're showing Evil Dead.

I told you I love that movie. Absolutely.

No, she can't.

No, you can't. Why can't she?

She never finished her presentation on the Homestead Act.

Didn't finish. Why?

I don't know.

Okay, here's what we'll do.

You can go to the movie tonight.

- Oh, wow. - Yes.

No. No, no. But all weekend long, it's just you, your history books.

Sunday night, I want a TED Talk on the Homestead Act.

- Fine. Yes. - All right?

- Okay. Cool. - Thank you.

- I love you. Now can I get a hug? - Love you too.

- No. - No? No, hug.

Why would you do that?

Because I was happy

she was actually excited about something for a change.

And to be honest with you, I… I wanted to be alone with you.

You think you'll get some love after that bullshit you just pulled?

Hell, no.

I have some good news.

You might even like me again once you hear it.

You are looking at…

Well, you're not looking, but you're going to look soon,

at the new assistant coach…

…for the Philadelphia 76ers.

Thanks for everything.

Oh.

- Stanley, Stanley. - Yep. Yep.

- AC! AC! - We did it. We did it.

- We did it. - "No! Get down there!"

- "Get your ass up! Get your ass here!" - That's right.

Yo, check this out.

This video is trending again.

Dr. J still dunking when he was 63. Isn't that nuts?