Leave It to Beaver

Leave It To Beaver,

starring Barbara Billingsley, Hugh Beaumont, Tony Dow,

and Jerry Mathers as The Beaver.

When you were young,

you had your own set of values.

Values that nothing could change.

An ice cream cone

was a snow-capped mountain of sheer delight.

An autographed baseball was more precious than rubies,

and a note from the teacher meant only one thing, disaster.

And that's our story tonight on Leave It To Beaver.

Mother and Father went to the picnic.

Alice and I went with Mother and Father to the picnic.

Mother and Father had fun at the picnic.

Alice and I had fun at the picnic.

We all had fun at the picnic.

That's very good, Judy.

Now, can anyone tell us what a picnic is?

Harold.

A picnic is where go out in the country

and eat food off the dirt.

Oh, well, that's not bad.

What else do we know about picnics?

Theodore.

When we go on a picnic, we eat hot dogs and hamburglars.

Hamburglars?

He means hamburgers, Miss Canfield.

Beaver always talks that way.

Oh, thank you, Theodore.

Now...

That's all for today, class.

Oh, Theodore.

Theodore, I...

My name's Beaver.

Beaver, is that your given name?

Yes, ma'am, my brother given it to me.

Well, in the classroom, I better call you Theodore.

Yes, Miss Canfield.

Theodore, I have a note here to your mother and father.

You'll be sure to give it to them, won't you?

Well, hadn't you better put that in one of your pockets?

Uh uh, they're full of dirt from my turtle.

Oh.

What did she do to you, Beaver?

Didn't do nothing.

She just gave me a note to take home.

For your parents?

Sure, what's wrong with that?

You must've done something really awful.

I don't remember it.

How about the time you hid in the locker

during fire drill?

Jackie Pryor took a note home and was expelled.

I'll bet you're gonna get it.

They'll throw you right outta school.

Won't they throw him outta school?

Thank you, Dear.

Mm hmm.

No dessert, Beaver?

No.

No, what?

No, I won't have any.

You have a new teacher, Miss Canfield.

What's she like?

Well, all right, I guess.

What happened at school today?

She called me Theodore.

Can I be excused?

Yeah, I guess so.

Well, Wally, ah, what about you?

How do you like Mr. Wilkerson?

Oh, he tells jokes in class.

Funny jokes?

No.

May I be excused too?

Yeah.

I want you boys to take a bath tonight

before you go to bed.

Okay, Mom.

Don't forget.

Okay!

Wally, weren't we suppose to take a bath

before we went to bed?

Oh, yeah.

Hey, Beav, ah, what happened to you in school today?

Well, they remembered to take their baths.

I'll get that.

You're gonna be expelled out of the second grade?

Who gave you that crazy idea?

Miss Canfield gave me a note to take home.

A note, well, what's in it?

I don't know.

It's a note all right.

There's a lot of writing in there.

Why didn't you give it to Mom?

I'm a scared of what's in it.

But you don't know what's in it!

That's why I'm a scared!

Wally.

Yeah?

Did you ever get a note from school?

Yeah, once.

What happened?

I had to go to summer school.

Wally?

What is it now?

Would they spell ya,

if you hid in a locker during fire drill?

I don't think so.

One of the big kids from the third grade

said they just might suspender me.

Well, they did that to a couple of kids last year,

but they're not gonna throw you out

unless you done something really bad.

What else did ya do?

Well, me and Billy Andrews hid in the cloak room,

and jumped out at all the girls.

That's kids stuff.

They wouldn't expel you for that.

They wouldn't even suspend ya.

Hey, weren't you sitting in the cafeteria on Thursday?

Yes, but that wasn't my fault.

Larry Mondello pushed me,

and I bumped into Mr. Thompson's cocoa.

Maybe Miss Canfield just has a grudge against you.

If she's gonna be mean, mustn't she have a reason?

Of course not.

When you're an older person,

you don't have to have a reason to be mean.

Hey, you know something, Beaver?

What, Wally?

You'll be the first kid to ever be thrown out

of the second grade in the history of the school.

Wally, couldn't we open the note?

Of course not.

That would be dishonest.

Hey, Beav, can I borrow some of your turtle dirt?

Sure, Wally.

It'll leave a ring.

Bye, Miss Canfield!

Bye.

Bye, Miss Canfield.

Bye.

Bye.

Theodore.

I found this under your desk at lunch hour.

Uh, somebody must've dropped it there.

Isn't this the note I asked you

to give to your parents last night?

I must've gots it.

Oh, you mean forgot it.

I must've forgots it.

Look, Theodore, you promised me you'd give it to them.

Well, I was gonna, but there was a fire.

What fire?

Our stove blew up.

Oh, dear, was anyone hurt?

Yeah, no, my big brother, Wally, quick put it out.

He grabbed the stinquisher.

It went shh.

Well, that's a shame,

but couldn't you have given your mother the note

after the fire was out?

She had to go bring back Dad.

He's in the hospital.

Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.

What's the trouble?

I think the doctor said he's got symptoms.

Can I go home now?

I have to help my mother.

Well, of course, I know how busy she is,

but do try and bring an answer back from her tomorrow, hmm?

Yes, Miss Canfield.

Isn't that the little Cleaver boy?

Having problem with the note, Mrs. Rayburn.

He forgot to give it to his parents.

Well, they have such important things

on their minds at that age.

Well, I know he's upset.

Seems they brought his father home

from the hospital last night.

Oh, what a shame.