Seinfeld

Aren't mannequins an insult to your imagination?

"You couldn't possibly visualize a sweater,

so we'll show you on this life-size, snotty puppet."

I guess when they're finished with them,

they become crash-test dummies.

That's the end of the line for a mannequin.

"Whatever happened to Bob?"

"Have you seen that new Volvo commercial?

He's got a bull's-eye right in his face."

Mannequins are only used for car accidents and fashion.

I guess these are the two situations

that it's impossible for us to imagine ourselves:

well-dressed or getting killed.

I'm sure some pro-mannequin organization,

doesn't even like you to use the term mannequin.

"Hey, they're not mannequins.

They're the life-deprived."

Mmm, that was really good.

Yeah. Are you full?

Oh, no. I've had just enough.

Ah, here we go. Apple pie.

Best apple pie in the city.

Mmm.

Delicious.

I'm not waiting for you.

Take some.

No, thanks.

You're not gonna have any?

No.

Do you not like apple pie?

No. It's not that.

Well, at least taste it.

No.

You won't even taste it?

No.

Come on, try it.

A little taste.

Come on.

She wouldn't so much as taste it.

She say why?

No. She wouldn't say anything.

She just kept shaking her head like this:

Maybe she's diabetic.

No. She carries Entenmann's donuts in her purse.

Maybe you said something that offended her.

The only thing I can think of

is I told her we should have

those moving walkways all over the city.

-Like at the airport? -Yeah.

That's a great idea!

Tell me about it.

We'd could be zipping all over the place.

They could at least try it.

They never try anything!

-What's the harm? -No harm!

I'm sorry. There's no reason

for her not to taste that pie.

Who wouldn't taste the pie?

-Audrey. -Dump her.

Well, I never broke up with anyone for not tasting pie.

I once broke up with someone for not offering me pie.

You did?

He could be eating a hero, Jerry.

He wouldn't offer me anything.

It's a sickness.

Well, I can't walk anywhere now.

I'm just gonna be wishing there were walkways.

What are you doin'?

I got a pebble.

Well, I never heard of that happening to a woman.

What the hell does that mean?

-Hey. Oh, hey, Elaine! -What?

Go like this:

What? Why?

Do it. Do it.

-But-- -Like this.

Like...

-Like this? -Oh, yeah!

It's you!

What's me?

There's a clothing store downtown.

They got a mannequin in there that looks exactly like Elaine.

Get out!

No, it's uncanny!

It's like they chopped off your arms and legs,

dipped you in plastic, then screwed you all back together again,

and stuck you on a pedestal.

It's really quite exquisite.

Kramer, what's the name of the store with the mannequin?

Rinitze.

Oh, yeah.

Uh...

May I help you?

It's this itch.

I was watching TV without my shirt on,

and one of my couch cushions didn't have any fabric on it.

Wait a minute. Rinitze.

Don't they have some really cool suits in there?

Real boss.

I'm going down there.

Yeah, wait. I'm gonna go with you.

I gotta get a new suit.

I got a second interview with MacKenzie,

and I think I'm really close.

They're taking me out to lunch on Friday.

-Let's go. Let's go. -All right. All right.

-You gonna need this? -Keep it.

It looks exactly like me.

It's like some pod landed from another planet

and took your body.

Don't fall asleep, Elaine.

What's going on here?

How do you think this happened?

Whoa. Look at this.

This is a beautiful suit, huh?

You think this could be a coincidence, George?

Is that possible?

You are perfect for that suit.

You think so?

Um, excuse me.

Where did this come from?

I don't know.

You really think this looks okay on me?

Fabulous. Perfect fit.

And it's the last one we have.

I'm-- I'm sorry.

You can't tell me

where the mannequin came from?

I told you, I don't know.

Well, um, is there somebody around here

I could talk to who would know?

Why?

Isn't it obvious?

This mannequin looks exactly like me.

Did you just roll your eyes at him?

Because let me tell you something.

If anybody should be rolling their eyes,

it is me, at him, about you.

I think maybe you're flattering yourself.

That mannequin is wearing a $1200 Gaultier dress.

What-- What are you saying,

that I'm not good enough for this hideous dress?

Listen, Natasha.

I wouldn't be caught dead

wearing your crummy little Eurotrash rags.

I'll meet you outside.

What is her problem?

Ah, psh, what can you do?

Um...

Is this the price tag?

Yes.

Yes, hello. Party's over.

I'll let you in on a little secret.

We're having an unadvertised sale starting Friday.

That suit will be half-price.

So do you think you could put the suit aside and hold it for me?

Oh, I'm afraid I couldn't do that.

It wouldn't be fair to the other customers.

Oh, yes, of course.

And, uh, we have to be fair.

So, I found out who supplies the mannequins,

and I called him up.

Well, how did they get your face?

I don't know. They wouldn't tell me.

Jerry?

Jer-- Hello?

Um...excuse me.

I couldn't help but notice you offered her a piece of your pie.

That's right.

And you waved it away.

Right.

Did you give her a reason?

Yes. I was full.

You were full. So, you gave a reason.

You didn't just shake your head.

No. I'm not a psycho.

Exactly.

You're not a psycho.

You've been very helpful. Thank you very much.

Allow me to leave the tip.

Well, I think we've proven who the psycho is.

We certainly have.

Hey, Elaine, scratch my back.

No way.

Come on. One lap around.

No.

It'll be a funky adventure.

Kramer, forget it. Forget it.

Jerry, how about you?

I think you know my policy.

I'm going home to spatula.

I thought George was meeting us here.

No, he's going downtown to guard the suit.

He's guarding a suit?

Do you need some help with that itch?

Madam, I pray you're not toying with me.

Whoa.

Turn around.

Oh, all right.

Oh!