Quigley Down Under

HELLO. HELLO.

EITHER HURRY UP OR LET THE MAN PASS!

PARTNER. THESE PEOPLE HAVE COME A LONG WAY, TOO.

SO I KNOW YOU WON'T MIND THEM GOING AHEAD.

MA'AM.

WATCH YOUR STEP, MA'AM.

EXCUSE ME.

I'M NEXT.

OLD PEOPLE SHOULD GO LAST,

OR GET THE HELL OUT OF THE WAY.

UGH!

I'M SO SORRY, MR. QUIGLEY,

WE SEEM TO BE HOLDING THAT MAN UP.

NO, MA'AM. I JUST SPOKE TO HIM

AND HE AIN'T IN THAT BIG A HURRY AFTER ALL.

WHERE ARE YOU FROM, MATE?

WYOMING.

THAT NEAR SYDNEY?

A BIT FURTHER NORTH.

I-I CAN TELL YOU'RE A BLOKE WHO'S LOOKING FOR SOMEBODY.

NO, SOMETHING?

I COULD USE A GOOD HORSE.

IT'S A GENTLEMAN FROM THE LAND OF THE FREE

AND THE HOME OF THE BRAVE.

A DRINK, SIR?

A PLACE TO REST YOUR BONES?

A WOMAN, PERHAPS?

ARRGH!

AHH!

OHH!

GRR.

I DON'T RECKON THE LADY'S ALL THAT ANXIOUS

TO GET IN YOUR WAGON, MISTER.

ROY?

OH, ROY, IT'S YOU!

UH.

I'M NOT ROY, LADY.

EVERY TIME THERE'S A SHIP FROM AMERICA,

I COME LOOKING FOR YOU.

AND THANK GOD YOU'VE COME FOR ME!

I'M SORRY, ROY.

I'M SORRY FOR EVERYTHING.

DOES CRAZY CORA BELONG TO YOU?

I DIDN'T SAY THAT.

I SAID SHE DON'T WANT TO GET IN YOUR WAGON.

WELL, THE BOSS SAYS

WE CAN TAKE SOME WHITE TARTS BACK TO THE STATION

'CAUSE WE'RE SICK OF BLACK LADIES.

SO YOU JUST TELL CORA TO COME REAL QUIET

AND WE'LL FEED HER AND EVERYTHING.

PLEASE TAKE ME HOME, ROY.

BUGGER OFF, MATE.

EXCUSE ME.

I'M NEW HERE

SO I AIN'T RIGHTLY CERTAIN.

IS EVERYBODY IN THIS COUNTRY

AS BUTT-UGLY AS YOU 3?

OHH!

LOOK OUT, ROY!

OH!

I'M SORRY, ROY.

UGH!

OH!

WILL YOU STAY OUT OF THIS?

I'M SORRY, ROY.

MY NAME AIN'T ROY. IT'S MATTHEW QUIGLEY.

YOU?

YOU'RE THE FELLOW, MARSTON

SENT US TO BRING BACK.

WE SURE SHOWED THEM, DIDN'T WE, ROY?

YOU GOT SOMETHING AGAINST

RIDING HORSES IN THIS COUNTRY?

WE RIDE THEM WHEN IT SUITS US.

BULLOCKS EAT AND DRINK ROUGHER.

PUT YOUR SADDLE ON ONE OF THEM IF YOU LIKE.

RIDING IN THE BACK OF THE WAGON WITH THE WOMEN.

I SHOULD'VE KNOWED TO BRING MY OWN HORSE.

HA HA HA!

I WASN'T TALKING TO YOU.

DON'T WORRY, ROY.

EVERYTHING'S GOING TO TURN OUT JUST FINE.

WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?

I'M GONNA BANDAGE YOUR HEAD.

OH, NO, YOU'RE NOT.

BUT IT MUST HURT REAL BAD.

I WANT TO HELP IT GET BETTER.

QUIT!

YOU HELPED ME ENOUGH ALREADY.

I'M MUCH OBLIGED.

I DON'T KNOW WHY

YOU'RE BEIN' SUCH A BABY ABOUT THIS, ROY.

JUST HOLD STILL!

QUIT!

NOW WHO THE HELL IS THIS ROY ANYWAY?

HEY! DO YOU NEED A HAND WITH CRAZY CORA?

HERE.

THANK YOU.

NOW LOOK, LADY,

I DON'T KNOW NO ROY.

SO YOU JUST LEAVE ME ALONE.

GO ON.

YOO-HOO.

GOOD NIGHT, ROY.

GOOD NIGHT, LADY.

WAY UP. WHOA.

WHAT THE BLOODY HELL IS IT?

REDCOATS.

MR. ASHLEY-BLOODY-PITT AND HIS HEROES.

FRIENDS OF YOURS?

THEY'RE BRITISH.

GET THAT BLOODY THING AWAY FROM ME TEAM.

WHY ARE YOU TAKING THE BODY BACK?

WE'VE GOT ORDERS TO BRING IN

ALL SUSPECTED CATTLE THIEVES.

THE BUGGER'S DEAD.

THE TRIAL WILL NOT BE LENGTHY.

CARRY ON, SERGEANT.

WE'RE LOOKING FOR 2 DESERTERS.

CAN'T SAY I BLAME THEM.

HAVE YOU SEEN THEM?

NO.

SOME NEW DISTRACTIONS, EH?

WHO'S THIS CHAP ON THE BACK HERE?

IT'S THE YANK MARSTON'S BROUGHT OUT.

YANK, EH?

COME TO DO FOR MARSTON

WHAT THESE BUG IRISH CONVICTS OBVIOUSLY CAN'T.

WELL, YOU JUST DO YOUR JOB

AND STAY OUT OF TROUBLE.

IN OUR EXPERIENCE,

AMERICANS ARE UNCOUTH MISFITS

WHO'VE BEEN RUN OUT OF THEIR OWN BARBARIC COUNTRY.

WELL, LIEUTENANT...

MAJOR!

MAJOR.

WE ALREADY RUN THE MISFITS OUT OF OUR COUNTRY.

WE SENT THEM BACK TO ENGLAND.

HA HA!

WHAT ARE THEY, KOALA BEARS?

KANGAROOS, I RECKON.

WELL, WHATEVER THEY ARE, ROY,

NATURE SURE PLAYED AN AWFUL TRICK ON THEM.

I AM FED UP WITH YOU.

AND I AM FED UP WITH ROY, WHOEVER HE IS.

MY NAME IS MATTHEW.

WELL, PARDON THE HELL OUT OF ME.

I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU WOULD TALK TO ME LIKE THAT, ROY.

I OUGHTA WASH YOUR MOUTH OUT WITH SOAP IF I HAD SOME.

LADY, YOU ARE ABOUT A HALF A BUBBLE OFF OF PLUMB.

AND THAT'S FOR SURE AND FOR CERTAIN.

JUST BECAUSE THE ROAD IS ROCKY

DOESN'T MEAN YOUR SPIRITS SHOULD GET ROCKY, TOO.

WHEN DO WE GET TO MARSTON'S RANCH?

WE'VE BEEN ON HIS BLOODY LAND FOR THE LAST 2 DAYS.

HEY!

THINGS SEEM DIFFERENT HERE.

THEY SAY GOD MADE AUSTRALIA LAST

DON'T YOU KNOW?

AFTER HE GOT TIRED OF MAKING EVERYTHING ELSE THE SAME.

WELL, I SEEN SOME PRETTY COUNTRY, THAT'S FOR CERTAIN.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING SO FAR FROM HOME?

THERE HASN'T BEEN ANYONE ELSE BUT YOU.

YOU KNOW THAT, DON'T YOU?

YOU CAN TAKE ME IF YOU WANT TO, ROY.

GOD ALMIGHTY, LADY.

GO TO SLEEP.

LOOK AT THAT, MATE.

WHOO-HOO!

WAIT TILL YOU SEE WHAT WE'VE GOT FOR YOU, O'FLYNN.

MATTHEW QUIGLEY.

ELLIOTT MARSTON.

WELCOME TO AUSTRALIA.

WELL, SIR, YOUR MEN ALREADY WELCOMED ME.

COOGAN, MR. QUIGLEY'S LUGGAGE,

TAKE IT TO THE LODGE.

MR. MARSTON,

YOU SAID YOU'D PAY ME $50 IN GOLD COIN

JUST FOR SHOWING UP.

YOU DON'T WASTE MUCH TIME.

I SPENT 3 MONTHS ON A BOAT JUST GETTING HERE.

YOU INTRIGUED ME, MR. QUIGLEY.

21 MEN ANSWERED MY ADVERTISEMENT

FROM ALL OVER THE WORLD.

CANADA, INDIA, ENGLAND.

THEY JUST WROTE LETTERS.

BUT YOU

HAD A WAY WITH WORDS.

MY ADVERTISEMENT SIMPLY STATED

THAT I WANTED TO HIRE

THE FINEST LONG-DISTANCE MARKSMAN IN THE WORLD.

HAVE I?

AAH.

THE LEGENDARY SHARP.

YOU KNOW YOUR WEAPONS.

IT'S A LEVER-ACTION BREECHLOADER.

USUAL BARREL LENGTH IS 30 INCHES.

THIS ONE HAS AN EXTRA 4.

IT'S CONVERTED TO USE

A SPECIAL .45 CALIBER, 110-GRAIN METAL CARTRIDGE

WITH A 540-GRAIN PAPER PATCHED BULLET.