The first 200 lines.
In accordance with the amended Smoking
Ordinance , with effect
from 1 January 2007, statutory no smoking areas
have been extended to cover the indoor areas
of all restaurant premises, indoor workplaces,
public indoor places and some public outdoor places.
No personal shall smoke or carry a lighted cigarette,
cigar or pipe in no smoking areas.
Help...Help...
Help...
Anyone out there?
Let me out.
Why are you in there?
I don't know. Where am I?
In a parking lot.
Why are you in there?
I don't know. I woke up in here
Please open up.
I can't open it.
I'll call the police...hold on.
Help me, it's stuffy in here.
Please open up, I can't take it anymore.
There's no signal.
I'll go make a call, be right back.
Don't go.
Don't go, let me out.
I can't stand it. I can't breathe.
Help...Help...
Sir...Sir...
You'll be fine. We're the Police.
Officer...
Help me.
Relax.
Why are you trapped inside?
I don't know. I woke up in here.
Listen to me, try to calm down.
Try to relax.
Regulate your breathing.
We'll get you out soon.
Control, I have a lock in, need to check a valid 4.
License plate KH416. Look up the owner, over.
Hang in there, sir.
Stop. It's giving me the creeps.
Don't. I'll get nightmares.
You asked...
for "Paranormal Activity".
Now you want parental guidance?
Should we go on or not?
Should we go on or not?
The last hotel I worked for was scarier.
It's haunted.
Nobody lives on the 13th floor.
The paintings in the hallway are really scary.
Every day at 6 p.m. someone will swap them.
Swap what?
What?
The ghostbusters.
I didn't hear that...
Forget it.
Stop.
The room at the end was really haunted.
Screw you.
Don't say it or I can't sleep tonight.
If you can't sleep,
I'll do you a favour and sleep with you.
If you still can't sleep,
I'll sleep with you again.
Fuck you.
Hear that?
Is that a promise? I have witnesses.
You must keep your word.
Don't worry, he's bullshitting.
I swear. That cop lives downstairs from me.
He said the Police put the OCTB in charge
and followed the car owner for a month.
They suspect murder.
- Then what happened? - Don't ask if you're scared.
They suspected the corpse had been in the car
and the ghost came back to tell the story.
But they found nothing after a few months.
OCTB didn't know...
how to write the report.
They told the guard
to say it's a mistake and closed file.
That's absurd.
Your turn, Enunch.
This is awesome.
Stop the spiel and get on with it.
Last Friday was creepy...
Stop it. You're such an asshole.
You know what I'm going to say?
What else happened to you last week?
Does it have anything to do with you?
No, but I still think he's an asshole.
Talking behind someone's back, that's low.
If you don't want me to say it, I won't.
Did you plan this? Leaving us in suspense?
Don't blame yourself, we're here. Tell us the story.
We'll take a vote to decide if you're an asshole.
It's really none of my business.
You decide if I should tell them.
Hurry up. - Go ahead.
It's none of my business.
I'll pretend I didn't hear you.
Keep this to yourselves, OK?
Last Friday, our client, a fucking pain,
who thinks anything cheap is distasteful
and anything high end is incomprehensible.
Finally, the work was done.
We decided to...
celebrate.
Let's order Chateau Latour on company expenses.
Definitely. It costs only $20,000.
Order it.
Excuse me.
Yes, sir?
Chateau Latte?
Not latte. - Watch it.
Chateau Latour, 1982.
OK, right away.
Chateau Latte?
Yeah, give him a cup of coffee.
Get to the point.
This is the point. - What point?
This was so weird, you better believe it.
His girlfriend Vivian arrived after the wine.
Sorry...
The class overran, I couldn't get a cab.
- You should have called me. - It's OK.
What class?
French.
Mr, Chateau Latour.
How extravagant. - Eunuch's treat.
Thanks.
You're welcome.
Right down your alley, try it.
Allow me. - Madam.
Did you ask how much this is?
About $20,000.
You're kidding.
Keep up the good work, or no next time.
Hurry up, taste it.
- $50...$100...$150. - Every drop costs money.
That's about $1,000.
More than that.
I was sitting next to Jimmy
so I didn't see it at first
I followed her stare...
and saw Vivian's bracelet.
Guess what I saw? - What?
Something was caught in the bracelet.
A pube.
No fucking way.
It's true.
Or maybe it was Jimmy's.
True, you can say that.
If she was shagging a Chinese,
you can say that.
But this is different.
That particular pube
was blonde.
Blonde? - Gross.
The follicle attached was enormous.
You noticed?
She's caught shagging a gweilo.
We found out later
it was the French Creative Director...
from head office.
Perrier?
What's so paranormal or scary about it?
Easy for you to say.
Imagine out in public
all his co-workers were there.
Some guy's pube is caught in his chick's bracelet.
You'd be scared too.
How can he show his face?
You're a real
asshole for using real names.
You're pathetic.
You wanted to hear it.
Keep this to yourselves.
What about your sick gag the next day?
Now you want to talk about that?
Why not? You told them the rest.
I said the reason she tried to learn French
was not "c'est la vie",
but "c'est la jizz".
That's so lame.
Lame but perceptive.
That's too lame.
What's so lame?
He told a sick joke.
You're late...
Jimmy Cheung.
I was on the phone.
You're Jimmy Cheung?
Yes, you are...
Cherie Yu.
It was a horror story.
How bad?
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