Chapter Two: The Mall Rats

911, what's your emergency?

Is someone there? Hello?

What do you want?

Hey! I said, what do you want?

-I said, what do you want? -

Hey. Is everything okay?

Yes.

Hello, this is the Wheelers.

Yeah, just a sec.

Mike!

Phone!

Okay!

Hello?

It's 9:32. Where are you?

Sorry, I-- I was just about to call.

I, um...

can't see you today.

What... Why not?

It's my Nana.

She's very sick.

But Hop said that your Nana was okay,

that it was a false alarm.

Yeah.

That's... what... we thought it was at first,

but then she took a real turn for the worse.

-Oh. -Yeah.

We think she might...

-die. -What?

Mom! Get off the phone!

How many times?!

Did Nana call?!

No, Mom! Just get off the phone!

Sorry about that.

-Was that your mom? -Yeah.

She's so upset, she's making no sense.

Because we have to go to the nursing home.

To see Nana.

-You can come over after? -No!

I mean, I--

I just think... I need to be alone today.

With my...

feelings?

Do you lie?

What? No.

Friends don't lie.

What, Mom?

My mom's calling me. Better go.

Talk to you tomorrow. Miss you already. Bye!

Hey.

What's going on?

Emotions have been shared.

Boundaries have been set.

Order...

has been...

-restored. -Wait, wait, it worked?

Uh, this is the first day

in six long, excruciating months

that they will not be seeing each other.

Yes, I think it worked! Yes!

No, stop.

It's all you.

I'm a puppet, you're the master.

So you remembered everything?

Yeah, yeah.

I mean, I had to improvise a little bit, you know?

It turns out, getting to Mike,

now that was the key.

And you didn't yell at him?

I'll tell you everything over dinner.

I was thinking, you know, Enzo's, tonight, 7:00.

Hey, before you say no,

I'd-- I'd like to make one thing crystal clear.

This is not a date.

Wait, a date?

You never said anything about a date.

I know, I didn't say anything about a date.

I just wanted to clear it up in case there was any confusion on your part.

-There's not. -Great.

It's just two friends getting together for a nice dinner.

I mean, we've earned it, haven't we?

I can't be out late.

You'll be home by 9:00.

-8:00. -8:30, I'll pick you up.

-I'll meet you there. -7:00. Enzo's. Meeting there.

Deal.

- - Hey, Chief, you copy? Chief!

Yeah, I'm a little busy right now.

Recall the mall!

-Yeah, well, I'm busier here. -Recall the mall!

You wanna keep your job tomorrow,

I think you need to get your ass to Town Hall. Now.

Duty calls.

Oh! Jeez.

Cleanup on aisle five.

-Bye. -See you tonight.

Oh, shit, shit.

Whoopsie-daisy!

Careful there, Nancy Drew. Careful.

Pouring coffee's a tough gig, girl.

And here you are, two creams, two sugars.

Thanks, sweetheart.

Of course.

-Tom? -Hm?

I really hate to ask this,

but do you think one of the other girls could run and grab lunch today?

They're needed at their desks.

I know, I just, um...

I really need to go to the doctor.

I've been having some...

um...

girl problems.

-Oh, come on! The light! -Let's go.

Look, I just...

I just don't know if this is such a good idea anymore.

Really? Because I feel like it's the best idea I've had all summer.

Look, all I'm saying is, what harm is there in asking?

The harm in asking is that Tom will say no.

We ask for forgiveness, not permission.

And if this story's as good as I think it's gonna be, then Tom won't care.

In fact, he'll thank us.

Or the old lady is nuts

and the story blows up in our face

and Tom fires us.

And then we never have to work at this shithole again.

-Have a nice day. - Thank you.

-Hi. -Hi.

I'm Dustin.

I'm Robin.

Pleasure to meet you. Uh, is-- is he here?

Is who here?

Henderson.

Henderson! He's back!

-He's back! -I'm back!

You got the job!

I got the job!

Hey! Oh!

Ah!

How many children are you friends with?

No, no. No way.

-Hotter than Phoebe Cates? No. -Mm-hmm.

Brilliant, too. And she doesn't even care that my real pearls are still coming in.

She says kissing is better without teeth.

Wow. Yeah, that's great. Proud of you, man.

That's ro-- That's kinda romantic.

-That's like... Wow. -Hm.

So do you really just get to eat as much of this as you want?

Yeah. I mean, sure. It's not really a good idea for me, though.

-I gotta keep in shape for the ladies. -Yeah, and how's that working out for you?

-Ignore her. -She seems cool.

She's not. So, where are the other knuckleheads?