Get Shorty

Previously onGet Shorty...

We need Bob Grace to sign off on our budget, or we don't move forward.

I work for serious people, Bob.

-Nevada? Where we're shooting.

And Rick and Amara got us a deal on local crew.

So all that money goes to the screen!

That's fucking brilliant.

Bigger budget. You could lose money.

I don't lose money.

Amara de Escalones runs the southern Nevada branch

of Los Chapulines cartel.

Amara is currently expanding her territory

to northern and northwestern Nevada.

This was a business partner of Amara's.

This was a lover. Lover. Lover.

Forgive me, my lord.

Lady Margaret and I have been acquainted since our infancy.

I have long considered her a friend.

Some say you consider her more than that.

Still others hint at a history of impropriety.

On your part and hers.

The lady's virtue is beyond measure.

Is it?

I've taken the measure of many ladies' virtue and come up short.

I'm quite sure you do not impugn the character

of your soon-to-be-wife in my presence.

And if I would?

Oh, I would be forced to correct you, sir.

Oh, my lady.

Captain. I'd not expected you back in Staffordshire

for at least another fortnight.

There's got to be a better way of saying that.

I mean, it's just a bunch of words, isn't it?

Words... Cut! Cut! Hold your positions everybody.

Don't break up, people, we'll go right away.

Not again.

Well, I thought it played out pretty nicely.

As did I.

Until I started vomiting narrative.

Well, we did rehearse this many times.

It's not working.

-Another line? -Sounds like it.

"Fortnight" doesn't roll off the tongue.

Yesterday, she wouldn't say "agreeable."

Okay, just give her a line, huh.

Let's get the scene done. We're already a day behind.

I'm on it. Just give us a minute, yeah?

Hello?

Hey, pal. I just need a real quick line for Lady Margaret.

I'm still at work.

Okay, it's the scene where they're in the garden

there's, uh, Felton and the... Uh, the other guy,

-the Sheridan... -41B. 41B.

It's, it's scene, yeah, scene, scene 41B.

41B.

Captain, I'd not expected you back in.

What if she just says,

"My lord," and we don't know which guy she's talking to.

Do we not need all the other stuff?

What about the Staffordshire and all that shit?

This way she's protecting herself.

Not showing her cards.

-Yeah. -Let's try it.

Thanks, pal.

Ed, why they waiting?

Oh, new line for Becca.

Told you she was no good.

Yeah, you did.

You come to my room tonight.

Yeah, I'm... I mean, I wanna go.

It's just the first few days, it's always crazy.

It's been a few days.

Now, you come to my room.

All you have to do is to say "my lord."

-My lord. -Yeah.

Uh, you're, uh, protecting your cards.

-My cards? Yeah.

So, you come out top of the stairs,

exactly like before, but "My lord."

Okay. -Call it.

Places please, everyone.

Okay, settle down!

Listen up, we're gonna pick it up from,

uh, Sheridan's line...

"If I want..."

Picture's up. Roll sound.

Just before Margaret's entrance.

Okay, let's go.

2ND ASSISTANT CAMERA: Baker 41, take eight. Pick up.

- Okay, action!

I'm quite sure you would not impugn the character

of your soon-to-be-wife in my presence.

And if I would?

I would be forced to correct you, sir.

Oh, my lady.

My lord...

Fuck!

- Hold it down.

- Jesus Christ!

That came out of nowhere.

Oh, fuck off!

Shit!

My aunt makes these strawberry lemon smoothies

with like, cayenne pepper and shit.

Bro, I can drink those all day.

Yago, right?

J.J.

Okay. I hear you up here making a movie, man.

-Oh, yeah? -Yeah.

Where'd you hear that?

You know.

Whatever you kicked up to Josias, you pay Amara, now.

That ring a bell?

Oh, you thought because we're down south,

you can jack a warehouse and we're not gonna know.

We been straight up with you, man.

"Humble Chef Mini Food Processor."

With the pasta press and the, uh...

And a juicer attachment.

And the juicer.

All this come together, or you sell this shit separate?

-It's all together, man. Hmm.

Tia would like one of these, don't you think?

Risa, too. Hmm.

You mind if I take a few?

Yo, don't fuck with that. Don't fuck with it.

Maybe I plug this in,

and put the juicer in your ass.

Grab one.

-You, too. No. I'm good, bro.

Fucking take one.

Need this?

Mmm, no.

No caffeine, remember?

It's milk.

Dairy hurts my stomach.

I don't know why I told you that.

I should get back to set.

You have those nut-free granola bars?

Yeah.

I mean, it's not just that she won't follow the bloody script,

I could live with that. But it's that even when she does, she's shite!

Yeah. Yeah, I mean it's weird.

She was so good in that other movie.

-The New Zealand prostitute. - That was different.

If she just would listen to Hafdis...

Fat fucking chance.

Excuse me? Is it reasonable to ask

why the crafty and transpo guys are packing heat?

-Which ones? -All the guys Amara brought on.

Look! See?

-Well, you know, Nevada... Oh, yeah.

It's an open-carry state,

so that's just part of the culture.

Brandon will freak out if he sees this. Liability issues alone...

Uh, guys, I'm gonna have a little chat with Miss Morgan, all right?

Please, be my guest.

It's all right. It's fine.

-No, it's not. -Yeah. I wish I had a gun.

Dad, look. It's awesome, right?

Yeah! Looks good.

Uh, shouldn't you be in costume?

Yeah, very funny.

You think it's too much blush?

-Hey, Annette. Yeah?

Could you tone down the blush a bit?

Step back in the trailer there, sweetheart.

-She wouldn't eat breakfast. -No, she's just nervous.

I'll get her a yogurt or something. She's almost late.

Katie, you said she'd be on time.

This is my fault? You sent her back in for makeup.

You wanted less blush.

- -Fuck!

- It's fine. -Great.

It's fine. I'll have the PA bring her to set.

I... I didn't sleep last night.

I'm more nervous than she is.

She's gonna be great, okay?

Wait, where are you going?

I... I gotta smooth something over. I'll see you in a bit.

- Come in.

Hello.

-Hi! -You okay?

Yeah. The wind blew dust in my eye.

Actually, can you, um, can you see if there's anything still in there?

Um...

You're not gonna see anything from there, silly.

Uh...

What is that? Is that the inside of your skull?

You're funny.

Uh, I just wanted to see how you were settling in?

Are you getting on okay with the other actors?

Yeah. I thought Max Kisbye would be more fun, but he's in bed by 9:00.

Oh! Well, I'll fire him and find an actor who likes to party.

I saw your wife with her luggage this morning.

Is she heading back to L.A.?

She is, yeah.

Well, if you get bored, maybe we could find something fun to do.

-I'll bet we could. -

-About that scene today. -Yeah?