Urusei Yatsura (うる星やつら)

URUSEl YATSURA

Don't get so fidgety!

Stop looking away from me!

More than anyone else, I...

...love you, love you, love you the best!

...love you, love you, love you!

...love you, love you, love you!

...love you, love you, love you!

On nights when the stars are twinkling...

...I dream all about you.

I love you, but you act like you don't know.

I bet you're crazy for someone else by now!

Ah! Men all have so many loves.

Ah! You're spreading them all over...

...and making me worry!

Don't get so fidgety!

You're always looking all over the place!

Stop looking away from me!

More than anyone else, I...

...love you the best! Love you the best!

I'm Lum the Notorious!

There!

Left field, back there!

Oh brother! When idiots hit, they hit hard! Huh?

Look out! It's gonna hit you! It's gonna hit you!

Did somebody call me?

Huh?

Damn, this must be an unlucky day!

Oh, geez... W... What the hell are you?!

Y... Your face, my friend... it's hopelessly horrible!

Actually, what I meant to say was that...

...you have tremendously unlucky facial features.

Ha! That's stupid!

I make it a point not to believe in superstitions and all that crap!

See ya!

Wait! You must not go in that direction!

A horrible thing will happen if you do!

A horrible thing will happen if you do! Fight! Fight!

Fight! Fight!

I have to go this way to go home! Geez! Fight! Fight!

What an unfortunate young fella.

I hope nothing evil happens to him, but I'll say his last rites anyway...

There he is. Moroboshi Ataru, sir.

His behavior fits our description. It's definitely him, sir.

All right. Do it.

What the... what the he... what the hell's going on?!

Who are you guys?

Let me go! I don't like men, you hear!

Me neither.

What the hell's goin' on?!

Get out. We've arrived at your house.

Ataru!

Shinobu! What're you doing here?

I heard the news, and I was worried... I was so worried.

Oh, really. Well, I don't know what the fuss is all about, but...

Oh, really. Well, I don't know what the fuss is all about, but... Ataru!

Ataru!

Ataru! Ataru!

Why the funny looks?

Look... Look inside.

Look... Look inside. Huh?!

What's going on, anyway...

"Oni:" traditional Japanese devils. O... O... Oni out... Luck in...

Where do you think you're going, Ataru?

We have a lot to talk about. Let me introduce our guest.

This is Mr. Invader, who has come from beyond the Galaxy...

...to take over the Earth.

...to take over the Earth. Huh?

That's right, my boy. I'm Invader. Nice to meet ya!

Well, this is very nice of you.

Patrol No. 3 to Command Center!

The electromagnetic field above the Moroboshi house...

...is increasing abnormally in strength! Over!

Roger! Maintain total surveillance! Over!

Say what?! You want me to have a duel with Invader?!

That's correct.

His people have given us a condition regarding their invasion of Earth.

The inhabitant of the Earth that their computer has randomly chosen...

...in other words, YOU, get to have a duel with him, and if he loses...

We'll go back home in peace.

Please dedicate your young life to saving our planet...

No... NO way!

I beg you, save the Earth!

Iscandar: A reference to "Star Blazers." I refuse! I'd sooner go to Iscandar than fight and be killed by an Oni!

What did you say?!

Aren't you a Earthman? Don't you love the Earth?!

Why can't you say you'll sacrifice your life for something you love?!

Good-for-nothing scum! Egotistical Villain!

Aren't you ashamed of yourself? Aren't you a man?!

Of course! As you can see, I'm a man!

Too much man, as a matter of fact!

Is this an earthquake?

Right on time. Your opponent has arrived.

Oh! W... What the heck's that?!

Sorry to keep you waiting! I'm your opponent, Lum!

An... An ONl-Girl!

Whatta... what a fine-lookin', big-busted babe!

Yessir, this is my daughter Lum.

If you can grab her horns in a game of tag...

...within 10 days, you win.

B... But, to grab those horns, naturally, I've gotta grab the body first...

Ataru!

I'm not easy to catch!

Not at all! With these hands, I'll grab you for sure!

You womanizer!

Well, I guess that's that!

Thank you. Your motivation is wrong, but we'll ignore that part!

Can we have a word or two, Mr. Moroboshi?

Mr. Moroboshi, the responsibility you must bear is extremely grave.

Your thoughts on that, please.

It's for the sake of Earth. If I don't do it, who will?

Well, folks, the tag game of the century, with the lives...

...of billions of Earth- people at stake...

...is about to begin right here, in front of Musashi-Koganei Station!

I'll show you the technique that earned me the name "Ataru the Hugger!"

On your marks!

Get set!

Gotcha!

That's not fair! No one told me you could fly!

You just didn't do your homework!

See ya!

Sign: " Countdown to Armageddon: The Last Day."

Sign: " Countdown to Armageddon: The Last Day." Only one day remains in the game of tag between Ataru and Lum...

Sign: " Countdown to Armageddon: The Last Day."

Sign: " Countdown to Armageddon: The Last Day." ...a game upon which the future of the Earth depends.

Sign: " Countdown to Armageddon: The Last Day."

Sign: " Countdown to Armageddon: The Last Day." Complaints are coming in from all over about Ataru's hopeless performance.

You see, surely, it's all Ataru's fault! He is responsible for all this!

I'm worried that if Ataru loses, and the aliens take over...

...I won't be able to play baseball anymore!

Ataru! Pay us back before you get killed!

Furthermore, we're getting numerous comments saying...

...that if Ataru loses tomorrow, he and his family should be executed...

...and we've received word that people in their neighborhood...

...are preparing to lynch them.

Dear!

Dear! I never should have had him!

I was a fool to start this match without knowing that Lum could fly!

That's right, Ataru! It's all your fault!

You took this on just because of your infatuation with her looks!

What's so great about her, anyway? She's only a little bit busty!

That's right! No matter how big a pair she's got, an enemy is an enemy.

No! I don't wanna spend the rest of my life as a loser!

Ataru, if you win, I'll marry you!

Mar... ry?! You're lying! It's a lie, it's a lie!

You're lying just to save yourself!

Silly! I just won't be able to stand you being a loser for life, don't you see?!

Shinobu!

Shinobu!

Shinobu! Ataru!

Don't you understand that your over-sexed nature...

...is the cause of all the problems?!

Listen to this crowd cheering! This is the Final Day, at last.

But, look at Ataru! He shows no willingness to move at all!

Are we supposed to tolerate this kind of "To hell with it" attitude?

Marriage! I'm getting married!

Anything goes, no matter how dirty, if it'll get me married!

For my marriage!

Hey! What're you doing?!

I did it!

Give it back! Give me back my only outfit!

For my marriage! Touchdown!

He's done it! He's finally done it, folks!

Our great savior, Moroboshi Ataru, saved the Earth on its final day!

What an unexpectedly quick conclusion this is!

Now, at last, I can get married!

Oh, I get it. OK, if you insist, I'll marry you.

Say what?!

Mr. Moroboshi, are you going to marry Lum?!

No, um, you see, I...

Now you mention it, I do recall you were screaming...

...something about marriage during the match.

Excuse me, but...

Oh, this is good! This must be the best goodwill marriage ever!

Ataru!

Shi... Shinobu! It's not true! It's not true! It's a misunderstanding!

Hmph! How can you say that, when you two keep holding one another!

Why don't you get married with her, then, you flirtatious scum!

Shinobu!

Darling!

"Darling?!"

On my planet, marriage proposals are sacred.

I'll dedicate my life to living with you forever.

And if you cheat on me...

This is fate.

Are you that happy, Darling? You're such a doll!

It's Raining Oil in Our Town

"Tomobiki High School"

That, comrades, is all the data we have on Lum.

The beautiful Lum has fallen, most unexpectedly...

...for that scum Ataru, and it's been a week...

...since she left for her home planet, to obtain her Alien Registration Permit.

We, who can no longer endure our longing for Lum...

...hereby announce the establishment of...

..."The Committee to Bring Lum Back to Earth..."

...and would like to begin procedures to bring her back as soon as possible.

Right on! No objections!

Let me introduce to you all the very important bait to bring Lum back...

...who failed in his attempt to flee the country...

...and whom we successfully captured: Moroboshi Ataru!