Side Hustle

Just when I thought I couldn't love

the Mooery anymore, they start serving cereal.

-And not just any cereal, our favorite, Captain Sugarrr!

You wanna sing the jingle? -I don't know if we should.

Dang it!

You know I can't resist joining that jingle.

Now I'm seven seconds behind schedule.

What is so important that you don't have time

for cereal songs?

-I've got a diorama due in Pennsylvania History class,

my dog Reggie needs a bath,

I've got a Yogurt Club meeting,

which I am not prepared for.

Man, you are so busy these days.

I'm listening to a podcast called Busy as a Bee.

They say that if you're not busy,

then you'll never "bee" a success.

So I'm giving it a try. But don't worry,

I reserved some time to hang out with my friends.

And it starts right now.

So what have you guys been up to?

Hey, I bought a milkshake for us to share.

Oh, thank you. Sharing's the best.

No, this is for me to share with Lex.

There's more where that came from,

thanks to Nana's birthday money.

Show's over, bro.

So where were we?

-Uh, weird question--was that recycling bin always there?

Ugh, not again.

Hi-ya!

I'm gonna recycle you like a used can of beans.

-Stop, pedestrian! -Whoa!

Gloria, you gotta stop doing this.

Yeah. You've been sneak attacking Lex

every day for a month.

And you're really bad at it.

Why do you keep doing this?

-You defeated me in battle at the Snow Cone Festival,

and my sensei Jaget says I must avenge my loss.

Those are the rules.

Jag-Jitsu says I have to beat Lex

to earn my Polka Dot Belt.

I won't rest until I do. See you tomorrow.

Okay. Finally, just the three of us.

Let's get our hang on.

And that's the alarm saying our hang-out time is over.

Lex, this is crazy. We hardly see you anymore.

I know. My schedule is nuts.

Now with Gloria attacking me every day,

I just can't keep up.

Even when Jaget's not here,

he's found a way to make things terrible.

-You're right. I need to talk some sense into Jaget.

And we'll talk some sense into Gloria.

Sounds good. Now come on,

I penciled in a few seconds for a group fist bump.

-Boop. -Boop.

Ah, sorry.

No time for my boop.

Hi-ya!

You're not Lex.

-Gloria, don't be mad, but we wanted to talk to you.

So we used a Lex dummy because we knew you'd attack it.

You could have just texted me.

I'll be honest. We did not think of that.

Look, we want you to stop attacking our friend.

It's ruining our hang time with Lex.

I mean, we see this dummy more than we see her.

And we hate you.

-Don't you have better things to do than Jag-Jitsu?

I'm just not interested in anything else.

Yeah, man, I used all the birthday money

on a milkshake for Lex. No, it didn't work.

Hi, Fisher.

What's up, Gloria?

Hi, Fisher.

Okay. See you later.

Bye, Fisher.

I think we found something

other than Jag-Jitsu that Gloria likes.

Yup. Call a doctor

'cause someone's got a bad case of Fisher Fever.

No.

I saw the way you perked up when you saw him.

Okay. Maybe I kind of like him.

What if we can help you get his attention?

Why would you help me?

Because we want our friend time with Lex back.

And if you and Fisher are focused on each other,

you won't keep attacking Lex,

and he won't keep asking her out.

Okay, I'm in.

But if this doesn't work, just know there are over

5,000 recycle bins in this town,

and I can be in any one of them.

-Jaget, you have to stop sending Gloria to attack me.

If she wants to earn her Polka Dotted Belt,

it's the only way.

I don't have time for this.

I should be building a diorama right now.

I feel like I'm about to scream.

Aah!

Challenge accepted.

-What challenge? -You just gave

the Jag-Jitsu war cry of combat:

"Aah!"

We must fight now. -What?

Tell the floor I said, "Hello."

Hah! Hah! Hah! Hah!

Hah! Hah-- -Move along, citizen!

Ah--

Uhh...

Are you okay?

I'm sorry, that was all reflexes.

You just defeated the sensei in his own dojo,

or should I say your dojo?

Wait, what?

Per the sacred Jag-Jitsu rules,

whoever defeats the sensei takes their place.

I bow to my new sensei.

No, no, no, no. My schedule is full.

I don't have time to be sensei.

I'm sorry, Sensei, in Jag-Jitsu,

there are no takesy backsies.

Okay, operation get Gloria together with Fisher

to free up time for Lex to hang out with us,

also known as AGGTWFUWU is a go.

Okay. Let's think of things Fisher is into.

We know he likes science and the keytar. What else?

Crackers. Always eating crackers.

-Are you sure? -Yeah.

When I do my impression of him, it's this, "I'm Fisher."

Shh! Y'all can't let Jaget know I'm here.

-What's going on? -Well, I tried to tell Jaget

to make Gloria stop sneak attacking me,

and he thought I wanted to fight, and I accidentally won.

Oh, no. According to the rules of Jag-Jitsu,

that means you're the new sensei.

-Really? -Yes.

And now Jaget says he's my student

and has been following me around.

I'm trying to lose him.

I don't think it worked.

Sensei, what are your orders?

Wait, if you're the sensei,

can't you just give Gloria her belt,

and then she'll stop jumping out at you?

I'm sure there's some dumb reason why she can't.

Let me try.

As sensei, I declare that Gloria gets her new belt.

Doesn't work that way, Sensei.

Before you get your full sensei powers,

you have to complete three sacred steps.

Told you there'd be a dumb reason.

I don't have time for three sacred steps.

My diorama is still due, Reggie still needs a bath--

Jaget, cover your ears.

I don't listen to you.

-Jaget, cover your ears. -Yes, Sensei.

Okay. I'm going to say something

I never thought I would say.

You should listen to Jaget.

What?

-Do his three stupid steps, become official sensei,

and give Gloria her belt.

That way, she'll stop attacking you.

Also, it turns out that Gloria likes Fisher.

Presley and I are going to get them together.

Whoa, so I could get Gloria to stop attacking me

and Fisher to stop asking me out?

I'll have so much free time.

And Dummy Lex can stay in the trash.

You missed a lot when you weren't here.

Okay, Jaget, let's do the sacred steps.

Make way for the sensei!

Come here, fly.

Catching you is the dumb first sacred step

to becoming the dumb sensei.

Where have you been?

I've been trying to catch this fly for hours.

Sorry, Sensei.

But you said you needed help with your projects.

So I made this diorama for your Pennsylvania History class.

Holy moly, it looks just like

the Trans-Pennsylvania Railroad.

I like to blow on it, pretend I'm the wind.

There are thousands of benefits to Jag-Jitsu.

This is just the beginning.

I did it! I caught the fly.

Two more sacred steps,

and then you're officially sensei,

then the fun really begins.

So what do I do with the fly?

Sacred step number two, release the fly.

Time for sacred step number three.

Wait, that was the whole step?

Yes. Some sacred steps are easier than others.