Magic Cop (Qu mo jing cha / 驅魔警察) (驅魔警察)

Executive Producers: WALLACE CHEUNG & ERIC TSANG

Producer: LAM CHING-YING

Screenplay: TSANG KAN-CHEUNG & SHUM CHI-LEUNG

Planning: SZE MEI-YEE Production Manager: JACKSON HA

Starring: LAM CHING-YING, WILSON LAM, MICHAEL MIU

Starring: WANG MEI-HUA, MICHIKO NISHIWAKI

Guest star: WU MA

Director: STEPHEN TUNG

Hey, Third Aunt, replacing electrical appliances for your son again?

It's Chu who has filial piety for her late father.

She wrote back, saying that she got a boyfriend,

and also found a job.

I, too want to go out and find work, but Uncle won't let me.

Joss paper clears the way; bribe the cow demons and snake spirits.

This year, there will be a full set of colour TVs and video recorders.

Next year, I'll send a car and a mansion.

Also, a refrigerator and a washing machine.

Your spirit is in heaven.

Mum, dad... this year, I'm only burning this much for you.

When I earn money next year, I'll burn you some better things.

Uncle Fung!

Don't pee into the brazier.

Hurry on back, your dad's looking for you.

My goodness! Third Aunt, you set it on fire!

My goodness, what rotten luck! Old people really are clumsy!

- Don't pour that! - Uncle?

It's best to avoid extinguishing while burning joss papers.

Why?

The gates of hell open once a year.

Ghosts hope their relatives give alms.

If they come in high spirits and return disappointed,

what do you think will happen?

- Let me through... - Third Aunt, don't pour it!

What have you done?

- There's a ghost... - It's alright...

Arlene, bring some joss sticks and candles.

Third Aunt, kneel down.

Sincerely kowtow and admit guilt.

I beg you, don't blame me!

Alright, Third Aunt. Stand up.

Third Aunt, it accepts your apology.

- Does it really? - Arlene, help Third Aunt back to rest.

- It's r-r-really alright? - It's alright.

Get some rest first.

Watch your step.

Don't be upset, don't blame me.

Is it really alright?

It's alright, don't you worry.

That's right, don't worry too much. Go in and rest first.

- There's a ghost... - Just an unintentional mistake!

You're forcing me to get tough!

Help me!

Arlene.

- I'm scared to death! - Look after Third Aunt.

COMMAND

Remember to burn incense for it every 2nd and 16th of each month.

Why're you laughing?

Uncle, you're more like a Taoist priest than a policeman.

Taoist priests, like policemen, enforce justice for the heavens.

Beer.

- Waiter, get me a glass of water. - OK.

Excuse me, bring me a plate of chips.

Bring me another ashtray.

Don't push me too far.

Lam, Sir ordered us to play these roles for real.

You were told to play the waiter, while I play the customer.

- You son-of-a-bitch! - Hey!

Don't chat with the customers while you're working.

You're messing with me, too?

Lam, Sir ordered it.

I'll settle with you later!

Call me Lam, Sir while on duty, not "Brother".

Yeah, you ask me to play "waiter”, yet have fun by yourself.

- Can you play the piano? - I can't.

That's it, then.

Been waiting all evening and no movement.

I wonder if the info was bogus?

Better dismiss the team, huh?

Isn't that girl pretty?

Sir, we're waiting to arrest drug traffickers now.

Accept that and pick up girls later!

She's been there for over two hours.

What's that mean?

Don't you think someone should keep her company?

You're going after her!

I think you're very stupid.

I get it, you mean she has a problem?

Look at her.

Sat alone for so long without having moved.

Never taking her hand off that briefcase. What do you say?

Hey, we'll check her out. Come on.

Wait another ten seconds.

What's the difference between now and waiting another ten seconds?

The song isn't finished yet.

Damn!

Chief, what's happening?

Single girl, easy to pick up.

Miss... the drink isn't suitable?

Miss...?

Miss, may I sit down?

Miss, we're from the police department.

I suspect there's a problem with your briefcase.

Open it for us to inspect.

I'm taking your silence as agreement.

Are you OK?

Lam, Sir, there's something here.

Don't move!

Miss, I charge you with resisting arrest, drug possession and assaulting an officer.

Hold it!

Who is this person?

Arrest her, whoever she is!

- Stop her! - Hold it!

Stand still...

Miss, stop moving!

Damn bitch!

Hey, come and help me!

Come and help me...

Duck down and hold up your hands!

Don't shoot! I'll deal with her!

Get out the car!

Hey... Brother, how do we write the report?

- How do we write it? - It's not hard to write.

It's hard to make anyone believe it!

Hey, are you done yet?

Almost done.

Not done yet? Let me see!

"Before we knew it..."

"A Chinese girl broke through the window."

"I, 2237, flew in, bumped into her and ended up in a complete mess."

Well written. Not bad...

If you'd typed it for me earlier I wouldn't have to work so hard!

That's not it. I'm helping type your resignation letter.

It'll be such a waste if you don't change profession to wuxia novelist.

Bastard, don't make fun of me!

Don't you think that girl was weird?

Yeah, a bit strange.

You've been sitting there over two hours.

Haven't you found any background on this girl?

Sure, she lives in Tung Ping Chau.

There's a granny who's aged 78.

Everyone calls her Third Aunt.

What are you going to do?

Call her in to identify the corpse and give a statement.

Are you really that tired now?

Is it so exhausting to use your brain?

Hey, don't keep going on at me, OK?

That granny is 70-something years old.

You ask her here from Tung Ping Chau,

and she'll need a few days' rest before she can talk, am I right?

If it weren't for our ten-year friendship,

you and I would have a serious falling out, you hear me?

Hey, can't good buddies share a joke?

- You've got head lice. - You've got lice on your privates!

- You're always mocking me like this! - Enough joking, then.

Make the call.

Ask our buddies in Tung Ping Chau to gather info and send the report here.

Thanks!

Uncle.

Uncle, going to Hong Kong sometimes does our well-being good, right?

Let's have a stroll in Sogo later, we can buy you some clothes.

Say no more.

We'll identify the corpse for Third Aunt, then go to headquarters.

We needn't go anywhere else.

Uncle!

What did you promise me?

I remember... get Uncle's approval to go out.

Watch movies only with Uncle.

I may not chat with boys... unless Uncle is absent!

Unless I'm with uncle!

Alone?

With my uncle.

That's better.

Your dad's dead?

Your mum?

What a tragedy!

Don't worry... You're so young, you can always remarry.

What nonsense!

Sorry... excuse me. Is it dirty?

Uncle, you've got him all wrong!

He's only wiping my clothes for me.

Uncle? Sorry, it's a misunderstanding...

Who's come to identify the body of Chan Chu-Chu?

- I have. - Be quick, it's knocking off time.

Senior, I'm Sergeant 2273.

I came especially to pick you up.

Senior, this way, please.

Uncle, why don't I...?

Where was she shot?

The leg.

How come? This is strange!

What's strange? When a person gets shot there's a hole!

When a person gets shot the wound will swell.

Yeah, how come?

Unless she was dead before she was shot.

She was so lively before she got shot.

She dragged me along several streets!

A person can move when they're dead.

Move, even when they're dead?!

That's a chain reaction of the joints.

There are many ways to make a dead person move.