My Wife Goes Back to School (Mia moglie torna a scuola)

My Wife Goes Back to School

...The facade was rebuilt in 1560 during Cardinal Giovanni Gambara.

After WW2 was destroyed and than...

...has been completely restored and returned to its original splendor.

forms leading to the entrance...

Beauty ornaments that adorn facade's...

...lines and sobriety...

I was saying... that sobriety structural lines of the building...

...result alternation of goals and fullness...

And that is the dominant feature...

Let's get to this element built in Gothic style in the mid-thirty's...

Magnificent opera structured in four stages of two kinds elegant...

...surrounded by an octagonal pyramid...

Purse!

- What should I do? - I do not know? Grab it!

...which its bells were calling people to harvest...

...and bringing entertaining moments for the whole community...

...of joy and the dramatic...

Bell was a symbol of the village...

Symbol and the ceremony, but the threat...

Involvement by the power of the Turkish community...

In 1494, Charles VIII ordered...

...trumpets to sound his army...

I want to buy this as a souvenir... How much is it?

Go back to your place!

Like I said... Charles VIII said with arrogance:

We will call the trumpets...

And Piero Capponi, with all his pride answered...

- Good! - You are so rude, Aristide!

What did I do? I said that spaghetti and sauce are good...

- Who was Pier Capponi? - Who was what?

- Who was that? - He was...

A guy who created hens without eggs...

- See, you're ignorant! - Me?

Yes, you... You do not even know who he was Pier Capponi!

I know... We have a record with him...

The one who sings like chicken with no balls...

Good one...

What's for the main course?

Now what? Should I eat it?

- That's not food, it's to read! - Why should I read it?

- So you do not feel ignorant? - Am I missing something?

I have you, Cartier watch...

In Balearean Islands we spend vacations on the yacht...

... I make tons of money... - But not with your brain!

With prosciutto, salami, mozzarella...

...and wheat... Yes, ma'am! With wheat grain...

And you liked it?

Don't you have the need to educate yourself, to buy books?

- Books? I already have one! - History of cheese.

Ignorant!

Come on honey...

No offense to that Ciccioni Pier... Pier Chiaponi...

- What was he called? - Pier Capponi!

- Yes, we have his vinyl record. - He's not a singer, he's a patriot!

A patriot- singer? If you say so...

In any case... Long live Pier Capponi!

And long live my beautiful Valentina!

I love them both! How is my mozzarelita?

Mozzarelina not to be touched! I'm serious.

And I'm serious! I'm always serious when...

Please Aristide! Don't behave like an idiot that you're!

You look happy with your ignorance . But I want to have a "cul-tu-re"!

If it's just for that... Couldn't you tell me right away?

- You don't mind? - You can have all the culture you want...

Frankly, I'd like to go back to school to learn...

Where do you want to go... ?

We are rich, we are doing well...

You stay home, you wait for your husband...

...coming home, to see his mozarellina...

...and carefully grabs it and quickly becomes...

Do not move! Do not move!

- Be aware that I have a beast... - Where?

A beast with two big... Here's my best... what a beast....

Where you going, Valentina?

It's all the fault of that Pier Capponi...

If I catch this Pier Capponi, I'll rip his balls off...

- Prof. Pier Capponi! - Yes, Mrs. Principal!

Prof. Pier Capponi! You're too peculiar!

- Do you understand? - What do you mean?

Yes. You don't understand that in this school...

...we rise branches of culture...

...among best prospects of society.

But here are the outcasts from all the schools in Italy.

You see? You do not understand anything.

That's why you so peculiar.

- Anyway... - Anyway.

Increased costs forced us to reduce the number of teachers...

And you, Professor Pier Capponi... You are the one who risk more...

- Or maybe... - Or maybe?

I am a single woman...

I'm tired of doing all by myself in this college...

and I'm tired of being alone...

I'm seeking for a man who could share with me the role of managing the school...

Pity that at the end you will be laid off...

- Or maybe... - Or maybe?

Pier Capponi, you're a moron!

- There's one waiting outside... - One what?

- One lady worth... a thousand...! - Let her in?

Yes, I let her in. Come in!

- Hello! - Can I help me?

- Are you the Principal? - No, he's an idiot!

I am the Principal! You can leave, Pier Capponi!

- Are you Pier Capponi? - Modestly...

Pier Capponi, I told you to leave!

Seat down!

- It was closed. - I saw it!

Not. You felt it.

I'm telling you for the last time, Gustavo! You shouldn't take advantage of this. Clear?

Why?

You're an administrator only because you're my brother-in-law.

"Each carry your own cross, mine is you"!

If it wasn't for my wife, she had the misfortune to be your sister...

"You would live like a famous Santippe..."

- What? - "I gave you my whole life on hand..."

- Married? - Yes.

- Offsprings? - What?

- I said: offsprings! - I do not know, sometimes...

How, sometimes? Do you have children?

Children... No, no...

300,000 liras is a monthly fee. Visitations on Sunday's afternoon, only.

Within three months you can get a general education diploma.

- A diploma? - Yes.

What? What's that?

I got you!

- As usual! - I got hit in the head...

- Rude, vulgar and uneducated! - Stop with that "uneducated"!

Better tell me where have you been untill this hour!?

I enrolled into private college, classes start tomorrow.

What's an intelligent face expression, Aristide!

Aren't you proud of your wife?

I start college tomorrow and you don't tell me anything?

Please... don't be like that. Aren't you proud of your treasure?

- Say something! - I...

I want...

No, darling! Your treasure must study.

I can't waste my energy. See you in three months.

- Three months? So this is the last night... - Yes.

Last night and you don't want to... I am your husband... you can't do this to me...

I'm your husband...

I'm desperate... Last night and I can not...

Stop, Aristide! Let's make a deal...

Here is a proposition.

You give me something and I...

...I'll give you something.

This time, I got you...

I caught something!

- My balls... - You've got what you deserve.

"August 15th, it rains". Continue, please.

- I want to see what you write? - Leave me alone.

- Where are you going? - Throw it to the basket.

- To the basket. - Yes.

You can't come up with any ideas?

If it rains on August 15th and you don't know what to do...

You're single!

I'm watching you, Bernardi! I kick you out...

You'll see Bernardi...

One, two, three...

Where're you going, Professor?

- Where? - To the bathroom!

- Who is going to look after your class? - It's urgent...

I need to talk to you about the scheduling fot the next semester.

What's going on with you?

- Something wrong? - Stop, please! Bathroom!

Why I can't have a moment with you?

Let me go! I have to go!

Professor...

- It's me. - Are you really Pier Capponi?

Modestly...

I'm so excited, Professor! I am a great admirer of you.

Who knows how much you've learned, how much you know...

- Besides... - Yes.

If you want, I can give you some private lessons.

I'd love to, but when?

In your spare time... Tonight, in your room?

Would you do that for me?

For cultural training... What is your room number?

- 28. - At 8:30pm?

I'll be waiting!

- Professor! I forgot... - Yes?

What? Mozzarelina?

- Are you crazy? - Someone's looking for me, Gustavo?

It's something about food...

- Who is it? - Is this you, my mozzarelina?

This is a college, not a grocery store.

I know, unfortunately it's a college... Nothing beats grocery store.

Who you are, what do you want?

I want to talk to my wife, Valentina Buratti.

Buratti. Ask her to come here! Is this something urgent?

Very urgent... I can not resist...

- I'd permit only this time. You understand? - Yes.

How I miss you, Valentina...

- Hello! - Treasure of my heart...

Hi, Aristide! What's so urgent?

What? I can't hold it anymore!

I'm missing you, mozzarelina!

My prosciuttino! Lack of mozzarelina upsets me.

- Yeah, I understand! - How, understand?

One hand hurts... I can't work numbers...

- I'm sorry! - How, you sorry?