Ballers

What do we do now?

Well, we stabilize our client list,

and we rally the troops.

-Lance started his own company. -Is this a joke?

You're gonna have to sue me, aren't you, Spencer?

I will bankrupt you, you piece of shit.

Thinkin' about unretiring.

You never really know until you get punched in the face.

Punch me in the face before I beat yo' ass.

Don't hit me!

You okay?

Might be ready.

Your girl Donna put a pic up on IG of me and Tasha!

I hope you're not asking me to apologize.

Of course not, I would never-- I want you to lie.

How about I buy my company back from you

at 50 cents on the dollar? Go back to what you're good at.

Take that offer, and stick it straight up your--

Good morning.

- I'm here to see Sean. - I know you.

- You played for the Dolphins. - I did, yeah.

So exciting to have you here.

Why, thank you. I'm excited to be here.

Hey, it's Mary in reception.

I have Jason Taylor here for Sean.

OK, thank you.

Someone's gonna come right out and get you.

Please, just have a seat.

- Thank you, Mary. - Mm-hm.

Man: What are you havin' this time, Joe?

Joe: Dealer's choice.

As long as it ends in "-uila."

Joe: Excuse me.

I've had a shit day.

What do you say? Will you drink with me, and then we go get lost

and share a beautiful moment together?

I'm sorry, I work here, and we're not allowed to drink with the guests.

Quit!

I can't. I have a family to support.

Oh. What are your kids' names?

I don't have any kids.

Reload, Donny.

Thank you.

Ohh... Ohh.

You got any cocaine? You know where I can find cocaine?

- ( thud ) - Ow!

- Gimme my fuckin' keys! - I can't do that, sir.

You're drunk.

Would you call me an Uber

so I can go back to my hotel, please?

You're staying at this hotel, sir.

Sorry to keep you waiting.

No problem. I'm Spencer Strasmore.

I'm Sean, this is Nick, we are with Distribution and Acquisitions.

So you guys are in charge of my channel.

- Yeah, we are. - Thanks for meeting on short notice.

I never took you for an action sports guy.

Because I'm not. But I do like making money.

Well, how can we help you make more?

Let's start by getting me a better channel.

Getting me out of the nosebleeds.

How do I get around Fox Sports Net, NBC Sports?

I'm sure one of your computer geek experts

can just type on the keyboard and move me on down the line.

It's really not that easy. Besides, it doesn't matter

where your house is located if nobody will come visit.

- You're referring to our fan base? - Nick: Or lack thereof.

You guys have no fan base. Zero. None.

- Are you exaggerating? Come on. - Sean: No, he's not.

You polled at 0.001.

You went dark last week-- how many calls do you think we got?

- I'm guessing zero. - Bingo.

You should be more concerned with being dropped from our system.

Obviously Lance didn't give a shit

about making money, or ratings, but I do.

The dark days are over. I need you guys to help me help myself.

Well, as you said, in so many words,

content that moves the needle--

like your old sport.

Those rights are spoken for.

Yeah, I know. We own them.

Surf and skate will never work

in our demo, Spencer.

We know what works,

and we just want to get more of it.

- What about college football? - We'd love that.

Our SEC Network is killing it.

Do you have exclusive rights to anything?

I don't, but I can get access.

Great. But we're only interested in brand names--

Notre Dame, Ohio State,

or if it's a big market team like USC.

And prying them loose ain't gonna be easy, as you know.

Let me worry about the prying, huh?

Deliver that, and we can deliver your net to prime time.

All right.

Hey, you guys, uh, see the Big Man today?

About eight foot tall, always angry?

No? All right.

- You see Spencer? - Jess: He's MIA.

I haven't heard from him all morning.

- Kinda like you. - Hmm. Yeah.

He's probably hiding from me.

Hey, are you planning on addressing the team?

Because they could def use a morale boost.

You can't avoid them forever.

Uh... yeah, sure. I will do that.

But first I was thinking I might make myself a Bloody Mary.

What do you think about that? That's a great idea.

You know where Lance kept the liquor?

We don't have liquor in the office.

Are you fucking kidding me? I mean, come on,

that's... that's amateur.

We have a shit-ton of opioids in the closet.

I will take that.

Enid.

You look amazing today.

And you look drunk.

Drunk! ( laughs )

No. Maybe drunk with love for you.

Hey, how fast do you think you can give me a client breakdown

with a receivables report?

- ( loud thud ) - Oh, my God!

Mm-kay.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no!

Shh! Give it to me. There you go.

Thank you. See?

Young lady, this is the benefits of being Old School.

And you can't get hacked.

And you can't get hacked, Jesse.

She doesn't care. She's a hacker.

Amazing work. I can't do without you.

I love you very much.

Ledger kiss.

Don't quit on me, Ricky.

Where I'm from, you don't quit

unless your shit's about to snap or you're gettin' choked out.

I'd rather be choked out by you than taken down by Calais Campbell.

You say that now, till I snatch up that neck, put you to sleep.

Man, your love is something else.

Gimme one of them. Good work, baby.

- Take a shower. - Thank you.

KT, what up, baby?

Ricky motherfuckin' Jerret.

What you doin' out in L.A.?

I just flew out here. My girl love it, so I might stick around.

- How is Tiffany, anyway? - T good, bro.

But I was talking about my girl Tasha.

She on some Cali love sort of shit.

- What you workin' on? - I'm workin' on being

a better man for my daughter and her momma.

That's beautiful, Rick.

I was talkin' about what body part, though.

What you got goin' on?

Oh. A leg day for me.

Mind if I jump in? Keep my black ass out of trouble?

- Let's do it. - Take off one of them plates for me, baby.

What? You slippin', man. Season's just around the corner.

Ain't like that. I'm tryin' to lean up, bro.

Get quicker.

I might even go vegan, like Brady.

You know what? I could never fuck after I ate a porterhouse.

Shit, only thing gettin' hard on me

after I eat a porterhouse is my arteries, nigga.

Dolphins got you playin' all three downs now, huh?

Nah, I'm done with the Fins, bro.

What? Goin' shoppin', huh?

Shit, yeah. Like a motherfuckin' lottery winner, baby.

Word is, Rams lookin' for a slot.

- You don't say. - Yeah.

Jason gonna put you up for that?

Yeah. That's why I'm out here, meet with Chuck, handle shit.

That's a good idea.

Think you got some advice for me?

Like, old generation to new generation?

- Advice? - Advice, yeah.

Why don't you get some new hands?

You tryin' to say I can't catch?

- You callin' me old? - You are old.

Ah. Desperate times... call for desperate measures.

Look to your left and look to your right.