Return from the River Kwai

Here you go. Have a drink of this.

JAPANESE SOLDIERS SHOUT ORDERS

Bloody hell! The Yanks are doing us a favour.

CHEERING AND LAUGHING

Beauty! Yeah, you beauty!

Bomb the shit out of them!

HE SHOUTS IN JAPANESE

Stop, you yellow bastard!

Hold your water!

Righto, lads. Form up.

ENGINE SPUTTERS

- Fair dinkum, matey. This is what we've been planning for. - Yes, sir.

Come on. Righto, lads!

SOLDIER SHOUTS IN JAPANESE

Buck up, lads. We'll have our day soon.

HE SPEAKS IN JAPANESE

The Yanks, they pranged the bridge.

GROANS OF PAIN

Whoa, whoa. Hold on, hold on.

Take this Japanese inside.

You let English prisoner die while you treat the enemy.

Oh, don't be an ass!

- I'm a doctor. - Ready, sir. - Coming.

I'm starting to feel it.

Keep calm, there's no need to panic.

- Have 4cc ready. - Yes, sir.

All right, old chap.

I can save the knee but that's the best I can do.

I might as well be dead.

Oh, never. Chips'll make you a new limb.

You'll walk again in three months. You'll see.

Get on with it, then.

Let's do it quickly, then.

BIRDS SCREECH

Thank you.

- You come from where? - Burma, Burma.

- English? - American.

Flew in?

Oh, airplane. Yeah.

American airplane. Would you help me with this?

- I've got a problem with my shoulder. - You sick?

Yeah, it hurts. I hit the tree when I came down. Thank you.

Come with us.

Hurry up.

I think I'm going to faint.

DISTANT SINGING

# ..watched and waited till his billy boiled

# You'll come a-waltzing Matilda with me... #

# Waltzing Matilda waltzing Matilda

# You'll come a-waltzing Matilda with me...

# And he sang as he watched and waited till his billy boiled

# You'll come a-waltzing Matilda with me

# Down came a jumbuck to drink by the billabong

# Up jumped a swagman and grabbed him with glee... #

- Right turn! - # ..jumbuck in his tucker bag... #

- Left wheel! - # You'll come a-waltzing...

# Waltzing Matilda, waltzing Matilda

# You'll come a-waltzing Matilda with me... #

Squad... Halt.

Squad... Halt.

Right turn!

Prisoners,

this morning,

American airplanes destroyed our bridge.

Many Japanese were killed.

Now, for what your allies have done,

three of you will be executed.

MURMURS OF PROTEST

HE SPEAKS IN JAPANESE

What are you...? Get off!

No! SHOUTS OF PROTEST

Shut up! I'm going to complain!

Get off!

Get off! Get off!

Get off me!

Leave me alone! - Get off me, man!

No! I want to see their eyes.

HE SPEAKS IN JAPANESE

This is a crime!

Do you want to join them? Hm?

The bridge was the property of the Emperor.

These men had nothing to do with the bombing. They helped build it.

Do not interfere.

Murderer!

HE GIVES ORDERS IN JAPANESE

Don't miss, you slit-eyed bastards!

Poor buggers.

No!

MUTTERS IN JAPANESE

SHOUTING

HE GIVES ORDER

Dismiss the prisoners.

Sergeant, stand them down.

Get him up.

Well? Are you going to stand here all day, mate?

Are you all right?

That bastard Tanaka's as mad as a cut snake.

Major, my men and I have had it.

Jungle or no jungle, we're busting out of here.

My job here is to save lives.

- I won't assist your escape attempt. - But now's the time to act.

- The Japs are losing the war. - Well, what's your rush?

It could be over in a few months. Just look at their faces.

They're all frightened.

If we give them the slightest excuse, they'll kill us all.

That major's arrival is a good omen.

You think my men care about an omen?

"Again I saw that under the sun,

"the race is not to the swift nor the battle to the strong.

"But time and chance happen to them all."

BABY CRIES

Welcome to Thailand, Lieutenant.

Who are you, sir?

Colonel Grace. V Force.

Say hello to Anon. He's our village chief.

Hello, Chief.

I'm glad Boonrod and the boys found you before the Nips did.

- Yes, sir, so am I. - Yeah.

We'd better have a look at that.

I'll take you to my house, we'll fix it up.

HE SPEAKS IN MEO

Boonrod, get rid of that parachute? Bury it or something.

- You speak Thai, sir? - Yes, I do.

But that was Meo. Boonrod and his people speak a dialect.

They've been our allies from the very beginning.

They're superb fighters, I may add.

Yes, sir.

Just how big's the underground movement here?

I'm afraid I can't say.

I do hope you understand.

But I can tell you an old Meo proverb.

Water belongs to the fishes,

the air to the birds and the hills to the Meos.

- If you follow my drift. - Yes, sir.

- HE GROANS WITH PAIN - There. That should do it.

It may be a bit stiff for a day or two.

But...there!

Put your hand on this.

- Pretty damn good with that cat-gut, eh? - Before all this fuss started,

I was a practising vet.

I found one animal's very much like another.

Thanks.

MAJOR GIVES ORDER IN JAPANESE

Prisoners of his Imperial Majesty,

you have completed your duties here in Thailand.

Your medical officer, Major Benford,

will you select the men in best of health for journey to my country,

where you will continue

your duties on the soil of Japan.

MURMURING

The remainder of you

will go to Tamanowa camp.

Remember this.

Your welfare is guaranteed

only by obedience

to the order of

Imperial Japanese Army.

Looks like we've joined the bloody Japanese Army.

HE CHUCKLES

HE COUGHS Ahem!

Dismiss the prisoners.

Parade, attention!

HE COUGHS

Yes, you're fit to go, Miller. Next.

One for you, Jenkins.

No, sorry, son.

That's all right, Doc. I didn't want to go to bloody Japan anyway.

Fellas, listen in.

Major Harada asked that you write down in your own words

your opinion of the Japanese Army and their methods of administration.

LAUGHTER Strewth! You gotta be joking!

If you get it right, Miller, they might let you join up.

She's beautiful.

Let's eat. Try and avoid the little green peppers.

They're absolutely lethal.

- KNOCK AT DOOR - Come in.

Ah, Boonrod.

THEY SPEAK IN MEO

Kamboori...

- What's going on? - The Japs are moving the POWs out of Kamboori.

It could start a major evacuation.

Are you with us?

- What are you talking about? - We're going to stop a train.

Sir, I'm afraid I'd be more trouble than I'm worth. I'm a pilot,

not a guerrilla fighter.

If you can't help get me back, I'll have to help myself.

Very well, Lieutenant.

If you can wait three days, I'll ask the boys to guide you.

But that's the best I can do.

Thank you, sir. No hard feelings?

No.

No hard feelings.

Wake up, Crawford. There's a Jap patrol on the way.

- How many? - About 12. We can handle them.

Pick up everything you own and carry it with you.

I don't like this.

What do we do?

Wait for the Japanese to make the next move.

- My flight suit. - Thanks, Crawford(!)

SOBBING