Art of the Dead

Hey Claire, I'm back!

Come see what I got.

Richie, Elizabeth!

Come to the den quickly!

Come on!

This is awesome!

So raw.

So...

So primal.

Hey guys, you gotta see this!

Claire, Richie, where the hell are you?

Guys, guys, can't you hear me?

I found the painting, the last one.

My collection is finally complete, Mom.

Mom, check it out.

Henry, your big brother finally did it.

I found it.

I don't know.

Claire?

Claire, seriously, bills can wait.

Claire.

Elizabeth.

Come see what daddy brought home.

Really?

No one cares?

No one cares?

No one cares!

No one?!

Elizabeth, where's your brother?

He's probably in his bedroom.

Richie!

Richard!

No respect for art!

None whatsoever!

One respect!

For this, that, that, that, that, that, that!

What the fuck?!

I'm sitting here talking to you guys.

I did not say that!

Or that!

But what can I do?

I...

Oh...

I know.

What can I do, huh?

What can I do?

Mom?

Henry.

Claire?!

Oh!

No!

Oh my God!

You did this to them.

You made me kill them.

You did.

You did, you did, you did!

You, you, you made me kill them.

They were my family!

Not you!

Not you!

Not any of you!

This ends here.

And it ends now.

That's impossible.

And finally, the highlight of tonight,

a stunning collection of these seven masterpieces

created in 1891 by Dorian Wilde.

This was his last known work

before his strange and sudden disappearance.

But his magnificent work speaks for itself.

Ladies and gentlemen,

behold,

"The Animals."

- Aren't they called "The Sinsation Collection?"

- I'd like to think of them more as--

What do you think, Gina?

You're the animal lover.

Did you have a pet goat on the farm that looked like him?

Why, are you jealous?

Yeah, I can't compete with that.

- Ms. Barryman, can we bid separately on the paintings?

No.

They're sold as a set.

It took us years to find these paintings.

I also like that pond painting.

Over a hundred years.

Reunited at last.

Something about it.

I say we start off at 200 thousand.

I can do two!

Two right here!

We got 200 thousand.

Three.

We've got 300 thousand.

Thank you, Stephanie!

Seven paintings is a lot.

Where would be put them all?

Well, you know we have the room.

We've got 350 thousand from Mr. Carter.

Do we have any other bidders?

Nope.

I'm taking these babies home.

- It's your call, you're the interior designer.

I'm just the lonely architect.

Going twice.

Four kids from two marriages,

how could you possible be lonely?

Short attention span.

351!

Seriously!

Yes or no, last chance.

Come on!

Do we have any other bidders?

Come on, guys.

Well it is for a good cause.

We have 500 thousand from the Wilsons.

Going once.

Going twice.

And sold to the Wilsons.

And that concludes our auction for this evening.

Thank you all for coming.

Thank you.

- Thank you for a wonderful evening, Miss Barryman.

Congratulations, Mr. Wilson.

They're lovely paintings.

Aren't they?

I'm so glad you ended up with them

and not that annoying guy.

Thank you.

Tess?

Tell me more about this picture.

I'd love to, come on.

Should we go?

Yes, let's get out of here.

- That's quite a purchase you made there, Mr. Wilson.

Are you an art collector?

Not really.

A fan of Dorian Wilde's work perhaps?

To be completely honest,

before tonight I'd never heard of the man.

- Do you know much about the history of his work, Mister?

Mendale.

I am somewhat acquainted with his work, yes.

They are hard to forget.

Father Mendale.

Do you like it?

Yes.

Where did it come from?

It was donated to our church.

Now I know serpents are not the usual symbol of our Lord,

but all God's creatures,

and it's just such a magnificent piece

that I thought, why not?

It's almost so real you could just reach out and touch it.

It almost bit me!

I'm just kidding!

Have a wonderful day, Father.

You too, Sister.

Thank you.

You're welcome.

You're welcome.