No Boyfriend Since Birth

One out of five brides is calm on their wedding day.

-There are those who are nervous. -I might slip or trip on my gown!

That is so embarrassing!

Those who get frightened.

What will I do if he changes his mind and runs before I even reach the altar?

- Those who get paranoid! -Guard the church door.

Someone might come and shout, "Stop the wedding!"

And then there are few

who seem to have watched too many dramas.

What if his ex comes

and throws acid on my face?

- She's coming, I'm sorry. - It's already late!

Where the hell is the bride?

Here comes the bride!

- The bride is here! - She's here?

The bride is here!

She's here! Thank God the bride is here!

- Where is the bride! -I don't know!

-Karina, I don't feel like doing it. - You don't want to pee anymore?

I don't want to get married!

Sheila, they're all waiting for you at the church.

All the guests are there.

Sheila, the priest is already annoyed.

Imagine! Starting tomorrow,

it's Joel's face that I will see

the moment I wake up.

And it's also his face that I will see last

before I go to sleep.

So, I have to deal with it for the rest of my life?

Sheila, think of this instead.

Starting tomorrow,

when you've had a rough day at work,

when you come home, there will be someone who will make you laugh.

Someone you can talk to about everything.

Someone who'll sleep beside you. Who will hug you.

Who will tell you, "It's okay!"

In other words, you'll never be alone forever and ever.

Ever and ever! Oh my gosh!

Twenty-eight. That's the number of brides

that I have accompanied to the altar to live happily ever after.

Twenty-eight! Much higher than my actual age.

Here I am, advising and giving pep talks to brides,

when I've never experienced being married.

How could I have experienced being a bride?

I've never even experienced being a girlfriend.

It's embarrassing, but here I am,

26 years old, NBSB.

No Boyfriend Since Birth.

Yes, Miss M?

The bride is with the groom at the altar already.

Sorry, there was a slight delay.

Okay, all right.

Hey! Why are you late? She's been looking for you. Here she is.

You were supposed to be back here by 12:00.

The bride was delayed. She had a panic attack.

I don't care about your personal problems.

Nor do I care about your excuses.

Nobody in this world is indispensable, especially irresponsible people

who do not care about other peoples' schedules.

You look and smell like you rode an overloaded bus.

You stink!

Our next client is on her way.

Fix yourself.

I was going to ask you how you were,

but it seems like a stupid question.

- -Hmph.

So, which part of your body

would you like to emphasize in your wedding gown?

-I think my boobs. -

My boyfriend fell in love with me because of my boobs.

-So, I want to celebrate them. -Okay.

So, you would like to emphasize your breasts in your wedding gown?

Mmm. But not all of them.

Of course! The priest won't allow you inside the church

if your breasts are exposed.

-Could you please stand? -Sure.

Turn around.

I think I've got the perfect gown for you.

Really?

Do you remember the Kim Kardashian wedding gown?

The first or the second wedding?

First wedding, the one with Kris Humphries.

Very feminine, very elegant, lots of boobs.

You'll like it, you like it?

-Yeah, you'll like it. That's the peg! -Of course.

Actually, we can adjust the neckline a little bit.

The client isn't all that tall.

If we emphasize her boobs too much, it will make her look shorter.

Now, if we add more pleating here, it will extend her torso, right?

Shh…

This is the design.

This is why Maleficent is always mad at you.

This is her design.

It was just a suggestion. You're the junior designer, not me.

That's right.

So stay calm, so that you will not look impertinent.

If you don't like it, don't use my suggestion.

What, hurt already? Wait, it's okay, I can consider it.

See, you liked it. You were just pretending not to like it.

Carrie, Her Highness is looking for you.

Why? What time is it?

It's almost five o'clock? She still has something to ask of me?

Report her to the Department of Labor.

Say she insults you and asks you to eat glass.

- -You're too finicky.

Yes, Mama, I'm just waiting for a client scheduled for a fitting.

After that, I will go home.

-When will you be able to come home? -After I'm finished with the client, Ma.

You! Last night you came home late at 11:30.

This morning I called early, and you were already at the office.

It's because I had a 10:00 a.m. wedding.

I had to be at the bride's house before 7:00 a.m.

You know, my child, if you keep on doing that,

you will surely end up a spinster.

How are you going to find

the person you're going to marry if you don't set aside the time to…

Ma, can we talk about me being a married woman some other time?

I have so many things to do here at the shop.

Goodbye.

It's driving me crazy!

-Carrie? -Hm?

Do we really need to wait for that witch?

I really have to go.

Glenn, Miss M told us to wait for the client.

Carrie, is the client still coming?

I need to do some important things, Carrie.

Glenn, come on, I was on the road at 6:00 a.m.

because I had a 10:00 a.m. wedding.

After that, I came straight here and I can't even remember if I had lunch.

But it's you who's acting like you've got pins and needles and being restless?

-Will you sit? -I have an important matter to attend to.

You just want to look for boys.

-Exactly, and that's important, right? -

- -Come on, let's go.

Sorry, sorry, sorry, traffic was really bad.

Wait a minute, I know you.

Rachel? Rachel Pineda?

OMG! It's you!

Karina?

-OMG! Rachel! -Hi!

-OMG! Wait a minute. - How are you?

Is this the dramatic highlight of the evening,

or should we expect more dramatic moments?

-Hashtag, ugh, it's already late… -Shh.

I thought was the name of the client we've been waiting for was Fiona.

Fiona Pineda.

That's my real name,

but my full name is Fiona Rachel Pineda.

No wonder I didn't recognize it.

My God, how long has it been? Not since high school, right?

Yes, the last time we saw each other was in back high school, right?

Now look, I'm getting married in what, just five weeks?

Then I will be Mrs. Rachel Mercado.

Look!

Mercado? As in Carlo Mercado?

You're getting married to Carlo?

Of course not! Not Carlo, his younger brother.

You mean Calvin?

Carrie, come on. Calvin is the youngest.

And he is only 16 years old now,

Of course I'm marrying the one right after him.

Christian.

Wasn't Carlo your ex in high school?

Mmm… Yeah…

But, like, you really like Carlo, right?

-Excuse me, of course not. -

Really?

- -Yes, I mean, no, I don't.

-You don't even have a crush? -No way!

Ah…

Okay, because I thought…

Whatever gave you that silly idea?

Where is he anyway?

Who? Carlo?

Is he still in Canada?

Is he still single? What does he do for work these days?

Look at this.

This is a video of a party we had last year.

We were there with Christian and the two other siblings.

And, you know, that was when Christian proposed to me.

- -Ah…

Miss Pineda, please come with me so you can choose your gown.

Okay.

This way, ma'am.

Hmm.

Carrie, what's happening to you?

Nothing.

Nothing?

It seems to me that you're feeling emotional about what you're watching.

Who is that, anyway?

Carlo.

Carlo? Who is Carlo?

Glenn, I love Carlo.

He's my first and only love.

Oh.

He's been my crush since back when we were high school juniors.

He was so handsome.

Of course, he was also arrogant.

It was because he knew that he was drop-dead gorgeous.