Companion

Most of the time, it's like--

I don't know.

It's like there's this thick, black cloud

covering everything.

Like we see the world,

but we don't really see the world, you know?

We're all just stumbling around.

Directionless. No sense of meaning.

No sense of purpose.

I know that might sound super depressing,

but honestly, I think it's a good thing.

Because it makes us appreciate the other times.

Those brief, transcendent moments

when the lights flicker on, the black cloud parts,

and you see the world for what it really is.

Oh.

And suddenly there's meaning.

Suddenly there's purpose.

So, uh, do you--

Oh, shit. Shit. Shit, shit, shit.

Shit.

If you're lucky,

you'll experience this once in your lifetime.

Goddamn, that was…

- That was smooth. - Yeah.

For me…

So smooth.

…it happened twice.

The first was the day I met Josh.

Uh, I'm Josh.

I'm Iris.

And the second…

the day I killed him.

Iris, wake up.

Hey, sleepyhead.

How long was I out?

Uh, for a while.

Yeah, you were zonked out there pretty good.

I was having the most wonderful dream.

Oh, yeah? About me?

Well, that is very presumptuous, but…

Yeah.

- …yes. - Yes. Knew it.

Was it sexy times?

No, you deviant.

- Little bit of sexy times? - No, I was--

- Was my shirt off? - No,

I was dreaming about the day we met.

It was all so perfect.

Remember how perfect it all was?

Yeah, no. No, how could I forget?

The supermarket, the oranges.

What road is this?

It's not showing up on the GPS.

I don't think this is the road.

Think this might be the driveway.

You have arrived

at your destination.

Thank you, Josh's car.

Thank you, car.

Pop the trunk.

Popping trunk.

Fuck me.

Kat called this place

a "little rustic cabin in the woods."

I think we might have differing opinions

on the meaning of the word "cabin."

Also "rustic."

Also "little."

What?

Iris. Come on. You know you can't lie to me.

Tell me what's wrong.

I'm gonna do something stupid.

I'm gonna say something stupid.

I'm gonna embarrass you. They're gonna laugh at me.

They're gonna hate me. They already hate me.

Jesus Christ, Iris.

We've been planning this trip for months,

and this is all just coming out now?

Like 20 feet from the fucking door?

Look, look. Hey.

My friends don't hate you.

Kat does.

Yeah, m-maybe, but Kat hates everybody.

I just don't wanna screw everything up.

Come on, Beep-Boop. You're not gonna screw everything up.

Just relax, you know?

Don't be all mopey and weird.

Just remember to--

remember to smile and act happy.

Okay?

Yay! You made it. Fucking finally.

Okay, so when you said remote, I thought you meant, like,

a couple miles off the highway.

I didn't realize you meant edge of fucking civilization.

Oh, don't be so dramatic, Josh.

- It's not that far. - Okay, hard disagree.

Uh, hello, Iris.

Hi, Kat. It's so good to see you.

So good.

Everyone, look who I found.

- Hey, Patrick. - Hey.

Look at you in the kitchen, man.

Yeah, look at me. Welcome. I would give you a hug,

but I've got scallop hands. Sorry.

Okay, well, I appreciate that. Where's--

- There he is! - Hey!

Joshyboy, Joshyboy.

Hey, buddy.

You too, girl. Get in here.

- Hi. How are you? - Hi! How are you?

I'm good. Uh, I'm… drunk.

- Oh. - Good. This is good.

Oh, and, Josh, you remember Sergey.

Hey.

Hey, Sergey. Nice to see you again.

- Likewise, my friend. - Oh.

Likewise.

And this beautiful creation must be Iris.

- Hello. - Mmm.

Such pleasure.

I have heard lot about this one.

Really? All good I hope.

Your lake house, it's really-- it's incredible.

- Yeah, and so secluded. - Yeah.

I mean, I think the last place we passed

was like ten miles back.

Seventeen. And I paid for this.

Privacy does not come cheap, my friends.

Not cheap at all.

Don't tell me you own the whole lake.

No, no, no. Don't be silly. Just all the land around it.

But let's get you guys a drink.

What do you like? Beer, cocktail, wine?

I'm fine. More than anything, I just need a shower.

Katyonak , what room they are in?

Uh, up the stairs, down the hall,

- last door on the left. - Okay.

- I'll see you later. Yeah. - Okay, I'll see you. Bye.

Smile.

Act happy.

Okay, continue. Continue with the story.

Anyway, so I was

wearing this ridiculously elaborate Dracula costume,

and I didn't know a single person, as I said.

So I'm standing by the snack table

just munching on carrots and something

- that looked like hummus-- - It wasn't hummus.

It was not hummus.

It was not hummus, I don't think, but I--

I feel a tap on my shoulder.

And so I turn around,

and there's this green, puffy dinosaur

just staring me down.

And inside its head,

I hear this very muffled, very annoyed voice say…

"You're standing on my tail."

So I turn around, I look down, and sure enough,

I'm standing on his little dino tail.

So I step off and apologize.

And he takes his head off,

and I'm looking at the most beautiful man

that I've ever seen in my life.

So, did you meet this beautiful man

- after you met Eli, or… - Okay, you know what? Shut up.

- Was that a scallop? - That was a scallop.

- Actually hit me. - Yeah, I took baseball.

Yes, you did.

Well, when did you know?

Uh, know what?

That--

That he was the one.

Oh.

Right then and there.

I know it's gonna sound cheesy, but the moment--

the moment we locked eyes, something inside of me just…

clicked into place.

Doesn't sound cheesy at all.

I get it.

It's like there's this piece of you

that you didn't even know was broken,

and then…

suddenly it's-- it's fixed.

And you're-- you're staring at this stranger,

this person you've never met before,

and you know…

that for the rest of your life,

you will do whatever it takes to make this person happy.

Right?

- Yeah. - Yeah.

Yeah, totally.

Patrick, this food is unbelievable. Thank you.

Thank you, Sergey. That's so nice of you.

Um, I'm glad you like it.

He spoils me. I swear I've gained

like ten pounds since we started dating.

- Only ten? - Shut the fuck up. Okay?

So, Sergey, what kind of work do you do?

Oh, you know, I have fingers in many pots.

My hands are not clean, my friend.