Duck Dynasty

Good shot, Cole.

Watch out, incoming.

Yep.

Hey.

What are they doing?

I don't know.

You got your windshield wipers on.

It's-It's sunny.

You can come out now.

- Hey! - Hi, guys!

- Hey! How ya doin'? - How ya doin'?

Y'all are back.

We were getting bored at home, so we decided to come over here

and spend a few days with you.

"A few days"?

Yeah.

Look, y'all can stay as long as y'all want to.

Now that Missy's parents are retired,

they have a lot of free time on their hands.

We were playing basketball. You wanna play?

With my boots?

Well, if you did wanna play,

I was gonna say you can back that thing out,

and you can park it on the street.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

Yeah.

Which is great, but her dad can be a bit of a space invader.

Streets are for strangers.

Driveways are for family.

That's pretty good.

I never heard that before.

So Missy and I have developed a code word

for when I feel like my space is being invaded,

"Missy!"

- Hey, Miss! How are you? - Y'all are back already?

Oh, I'm so glad to see you.

I didn't even know y'all were gonna be coming.

- Hi, babe. - Yeah, I sent you a message.

You sent me emojis.

Emojis have messages.

I have a car, a house, and a smiley face.

We're coming to your house, smiley face.

- Dad. - Ha-ha! Yeah!

Can't you read "Dad?"

Why didn't I understand that?

It's hard for me too.

- Yeah. - Yeah.

Do y'all want something to drink?

Mom, you want some lemonade or something?

- Yeah, yeah. - Okay, well, come in.

Y'all gonna play some basketball?

Well, yeah.

But we're gonna have to move that RV.

You think we're too close?

Maybe just a bit.

Ah, let's try it, pass me that rock.

All right, Kareem!

Uh.

Cole, go get the ball.

I'm going for some lemonade.

Smiley face.

Ripped By mstoll

Oh, goodness, goodness, goodness.

- Larry! - What? Oh.

- Good mornin'! - Good mornin'.

- Did you wash my truck? - Yeah.

Jase, you've got to have a clean truck, son.

It's all a part of aerodynamics.

All those dust particles, they get in the way, man.

Huh?

Look, I love my father-in-law, but compared to my family,

the man is a full-fledged yuppie.

Well, Larry, here's the deal, I kind of like my truck dirty.

If you wash your truck, somebody might steal it.

They look at my truck, it's unwashed, it smells like death.

They walk up there and they say, "Nope."

The few things we have Our faith...

Cleanliness is next to Godliness.

And our love for his daughter.

Oh, goodness.

So it's like a deterrent for theft.

But it smells like dead varmits.

That's about it.

Well, I'm gonna need you to move that RV

so I can get my truck out.

I gotta go to work.

Uh-oh, we got a problem.

It can't go anywhere.

I've got it all propped up.

- Your driveway is on a slant. - Oh, no.

- You put that thing here to stay. - So it's level.

You can fit through there. I'll move my car.

Okay.

Glad to have you here, Larry.

John Luke!

- Hey. - Are you ready?

Yes, sir.

Got the sign up and everything.

- That's it? - Yeah.

John Luke, I can't even read it from the darn parking lot.

Mm-hmm.

This is not exactly a grand opening.

John Luke is married now,

and he's probably gonna have a family to support soon.

So, naturally, I was excited he showed initiative

to start a snow cone stand.

How does anybody even know it's here?

I told everyone I know. All my friends.

Well, you must not have many friends.

They're coming.

It's the perfect starter business.

John Luke, this is optimal snow cone weather.

And with me as his partner,

there's no way he can screw this up.

Nobody's even hitting their brakes.

If you build it, they will come.

- No, no, they won't. - Yeah.

If you build it, they don't know about it, they ain't coming.

Then again, I've been wrong before.

- Brian's bought some. - Who's Brian?

- My employee. - Hello, Brian.

All right, look.

We've got a major advertising problem.

What we need is a good slogan.

It needs to be clever, something like,

like, "Ice Ice Baby."

"Too cold. Too cold."

I don't get it.

Vanilla Ice?

We have vanilla ice.

No, John Luke.

It's a song.

Remind me to teach you about the '90s.

You gotta hook it. Catch and release.

- Just stand right there, Godwin. - No, I ain't standing there.

Hey, he'll hook you.

- See if I can get a Si. - Hey!

Have you lost your mind?

- What? - What's wrong with you?

That thing's got a hook in it.

I was trying to catch the oldest fish in the sea.

- Wait a minute. - Uh-oh.

My in-law just sent me a cartoon picture of a piece of pizza.

A cartoon piece of pizza.

- It's an emoji. - What does it mean?

What in the world is "emoji"?

Well, maybe he likes pizzas. I do.

Y'all are weird.

Hey!

- Anybody hungry? - Larry?

- Hey, Jase! - Hi, guys!

I didn't know you were coming up here.

- What you got? - Man, I got something to eat.

Did you get my text?

He said something about you like pizza or something. I don't know.

Oh, is that what that meant?

Yeah. I sent you a picture of a little pizza.

Yeah, we were just...

- Whoa! No! - Oh, good grief!

That is a party foul.

That's yours, Godwin. That one's yours.

That's disgraceful.

Just dust it off, it'll be all right.

You're gonna eat it.

Look, Jase has got it pretty dang good

when it comes to Larry .

A father-in-law that brings you pizza at work?

That's pretty darn cool in my book.

If you keep bringing us pizza,

you are welcome up here, brother.

Hey.

I mean, that's up there with a father-in-law

that's also into video games.

Or one that knows how to use throwing stars and numchucks.

A true ninja.

Larry, you can text me anytime. I like your style.

Mm-hmm.

Come to think of it, I'm gonna be a pretty awesome

father-in-law one day.

All right, I've come to see the duck calls.

Where are the duck calls? Nothing here but boxes.

And the boxes are full of duck calls.

Give that man that duck call right there.

You gonna train me how to blow it?

Look, you got your greeting call.

That's the most famous sound in the duck world.

I don't think I can do that one.

Oh, yeah, you can do it.

Give it a whirl.

- That ain't bad. - Not bad.

Well, now that I've learned how to blow a duck call, let's go hunting.

The problem is, duck season's not open.

- Want to go quail hunting? - Hey.

- Well, yeah. - Yeah.

- I do. - I do.

- I'm in. - No.

Here's the problem with going hunting with yuppies.

Jase, it's a win-win, son. Pizza, now let's go quail hunting.

Yeah.

Yuppies go hunting for fun .