Jonah: A VeggieTales Movie

Now Billy Joe McGuffrey was a really clumsy kid.

On the first day of first grade

I'll tell you what he did.

He tripped over a pencil box,

Flew up in the air,

Landed on a kangaroo who pulled out all his hair

He needed First aid in the first grade.

First aid in the first grade. First aid in the first grade.

You could a buy a zoo

With all the doctor bills he paid!

Oh Billy Joe McGuffrey Was a really clumsy kid.

On the second day of second grade

I'll tell you what he did.

He slipped on a banana peel, Flew up in the sky,

Landed on a chimpanzee Who poked him in the eye.

Route 59. Where is Route 59?

First aid in the second grade. First aid in the second grade.

You could a buy a zoo...

AAAAH! LIGHTS! AAAAH!

Now Billy Joe McGuffrey Was a really clumsy kid.

Whoa... lights! Lights! Where is that button?

He fell out of a fishing boat, Splashed into the sea...

Switch! No! Where is it?

... Who bit him on the knee!

He needed First aid in the third grade.

First aid in the third grade. First aid in the third grade.

You could a buy a zoo With all the doctor bills he paid!

I get to meet Twippo...

Twelfth grade!

Now Billy Joe McGuffrey Was a really clumsy kid.

On the twelfth day of twelfth grade I'll tell you what he did.

Walked into financial aid, Fell and broke a bone,

Showed them all his bills and Got a great big College Loan!

And he needed First aid in the twelfth grade.

First aid in the twelfth grade. First aid in the twelfth grade.

You could a buy a zoo with all the doctor bills he paid!

You could a buy a zoo with all the doctor bills he paid!

Yay! Twippo! Let's do another Twippo song!

I love Twippo!

Me too!

But I'm the only one who gets to meet him,

because I won the Twippo Sweepstakes!

You don't have to rub it in!

It's great that you won the contest, Laura, but let's try not to brag about it.

Nice one with the lights, Bob!

My pleasure.

For the next song, maybe I can drive into the river!

Yeah!

Drive into the river Bob! Oh! Drive into the river Bob...

Or maybe you could help me with the MAP!

Oh, I'm sorry.

Is there anything you want me to tell Twippo, when I meet him?

Laura!

Ow!

My ticket!

Aaah! Quick! Get it!

The map!

Sorry!

AAAH!

My ticket!

Ahem... do you mind?

I'm stuck.

Whoooa!

Get it! Pick it up! Put it! Stick it in! Put it!

PORCUPINE!

Swish!

Whooa!...

Tree!... Cabin!...

UNDERWEAR!

Heh-heh... Well I'm glad that's over!

Did you say something?

Oh...

... dear!

Aaaaaaaaah!!!!!!

Am I in heaven? Smells like Wisconsin.

Well, nobody got hurt! Aah-heh!

Wow. What a shot!

Eeh.

Hey!... What's that?

Oooooh.

What's "SEAFOO"?

Maybe it's like tofu...

...only saltier.

Aaahhhhh.

Oh yeah? Well, if it wasn't for you we wouldn't be in this mess!

I said I was sorry. I'll do better next time!

There isn't going to be a next time!

Mr. Bob, how are we going to get to the Twippo concert?

Yeah! We're going to miss the bald bunny song!

I don't know! I don't know about any bald bunnies...

I'm a bald bunny...

Even if we make it to the concert, I can't get in! I lost my ticket!

Serves you right!

It's your own fault for waving it around in my face!

I have to go to the bathroom.

You know I'm usually not that clumsy in the car...

Two flat tires.

Usually I'm quite dexterous.

How in the world are we going to change two flat tires?

Where's the phone?

I lost my ticket!

If you hadn't been teasing me with it, we wouldn't be in this mess, Laura!

Ahem... May we help you?

May I please use the bathroom?

Down the hall, first door on the left.

Thank you.

Oooh!

Captain Ahab's Moby Blaster!

My favorite!

What do you want?

Well, sirs, the Asparagus hit me in the head with a guitar

and an angry mother porcupine shot out our tires and one of her babies got me...

Ooh.

And I need to use your phone to call...

...A tow truck.

My wife.

I see.

Next to the Moby Blaster.

Thanks.

Well, in the meantime, would you like to have a seat?

Maybe enjoy a nice combo platter?

Steak! Steak! Eat it! Eat it!

Shrimp! Shrimp! Need it! Need it!

Steak and Shrimp! Steak and Shrimp!

Need to! Need to! Eat it! Eat it!

Oh, ow, eeh, ow, eeh, ow! Oh, ow, eeh, ow, eeh, ow!

Got to, got to, got to, Get the steaky, wakey, shrimpy...

Do you prefer "poking" or "non-poking?"

Heh-heh-heh... non.

Ha-ha! Good one, Phillipe! You are one clever pea, no?

Ho-ho-ho!

AAAH!

Whala! A skewer for the scampi!

We are The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything... We just stay home and lie around!

Please make yourselves comfortable. I will be back to take your orders.

Why don't you two wait here. I'm going to go call a tow truck.

Maybe we can still make it to the concert on time.

Yeah, everyone but me...

Hey it's your own fault for teasing me! You're just getting what you deserve!

Hmm! I'm coming with you, Mr. Bob.

See, they got one guy. All he does... he just folds these napkins.

Oh, the napkin guy. He works at night after everybody's gone.

Yeah! You know, uh, he use to fold maps.

No, no! Listen to me.

He takes one spoon, he takes one knife and he takes one fork.

And he rolls it up in a napkin, just like this.

And makes it into that little swan shape.

Hey, could you pass the cheddar biscuits?

Excuse me!

AAAAAH!

How's it going?

Hey. What's up?

Who are you?

Uh, who us?

Yeah...

Oh! We are "The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything!"

Oh you know that's right.

Nothing.

Zilch.

Nada.

Didn't you hear our song?

Well, yeah... but...

Look, Sonny... Can I call you Sonny?

Junior.

Hey! Pretty close! Look, Junior, we couldn't help

but notice you were having a little thing with your friend over there.

Yeah. You weren't being very nice.

Well, it's her own fault!

She was teasing me and now she's getting what she deserves!

Right.

Junior, we've seen these types of situations before.

Happens all the time.

What you need is a little compassion.

...And maybe some scampi.

Hey, I saw that in the menu.

What is that? What's compassion?

Ooh. That's a hard question.

Mmm-hmm.

Well, compassion is when you see that someone needs help,

and you want to help them!

That's what I thought you'd say.

They all do. Yep.

We find it helpful to illustrate with a little story.

A story?

Yep.

You know, we call ourselves The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything,

but that's not entirely accurate.

Oh, yeah!

Remember when we did that one thing, with that one guy?

Oh do I ever.

I remember it like it was yesterday...

Are you guys still doing that 'pirate thing?'

Arrgh!

Watch your tongue matey, or we'll have to...

What will we do?

We won't do anything.

We're The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything, remember?

Oh, that's right. Arrgh! You got off easy today!

We need more "Mister Twisty's Twisted Cheese Curls!"

Yeah! And root beer!