L'uomo perfetto

The blonde girl is Maria,..

..my best friend, at age 7.

l'm the other one.

lt's hard growing up with someone so revoltingly fortunate.

The only one who seemed to understand me was Paolo,..

..maybe because even for him..

..life had never exactly been a picnic.

l spent vacations collecting shells.

Maria, however, preferred collecting of another kind:

..boys.

All of them, except Paolo.

Maybe he was too bulky even to manage to fit in an album.

But me, l was fond of that boy.

And l knew he liked me, too.

We just had to wait for the right moment.

And finally, that moment arrived.

Maria and l had come home for summer vacation..

..after two years studying abroad.

Older, but underneath still the same friends as always.

Paolo, in contrast, had changed. Wow, had he changed.

lf l'd been thinking at all, l would have forgotten about it:

..Maria knows how to get whatever she wants.

But that time things were different.

The guy Maria was rubbing against wasn't just anyone,..

..it was my chubby little boy,..

..my pimply adolescent, my nearsighted guy. lt was Paolo.

My Paolo.

Love makes us do horrible things.

- Everyone's in the conference room. - l know.

l'll leave your phone messages on your desk.

Maria already called three times.

How do l look?

- The truth? - Oh, go on!

Models in underwear have been seen a million times already.

l expected a more original, creative idea,..

.. outrageous, offbeat.

Well anyway, we hope it'll get there soon.

Sure, but now we'll need to review the proposed budget..

..and production schedule.

Sadly, the deadline stays as is. lt's up to you to find a solution.

We really should get going now.

And please, a bit more creativity.

- Thank you. - Good afternoon. - Goodbye. - Goodbye.

A little creativity, please. Okay, let's stay calm.

He asked for another idea, we just have to find it.

No big deal.

Get to work.

- Everything okay? - So-so...

- Maria called.... - Hold on.

Yes? What do you mean ''postpone the auditions''?

How many models did you call?

That's not enough, we'll need at least twice that.

Let me have their composites, l'll look at them later.

Okay? Bye, thanks.

- What about Maria? - Waiting for you downstairs at one.

Seemed really urgent.

- At one? - Yeah, 10 minutes ago! - Ah, l'll never hear the end of it!

Hi, sorry.

l was about to start a new life as a curbstone.

l had a meeting. What's so urgent?

- l even skipped shiatsu! - Okay, come on! Tell me.

- Headline: Party at Gustavo's. - Who?

Course of action: buy a yummy gift for him..

..and a decent dress for you. - Are you joking?

There'll be lots of people, great party, you could score.

l've got no intention of scoring.

And anyway, what's wrong with the way l dress?

lf l tell you, promise you won't get mad.

Hmm, not bad!

l think it's been retouched, guys like that don't exist!

They do! But they're usually gay!

- Well, what should l give him? - Who?

Gustavo! The one from the party where you can score!

- Who is it that wants to score? - Sweetheart, finally! - Hi.

So? Oh, from court to here by motorcycle in 35 minutes... A rush!

Nowadays you only find good coffee in bookstores,..

..real sushi in boutiques like in London,..

..and pasta in art galleries. - Are you ready to order?

l haven't decided yet.

- Should l order for you, too? - Two lukewarm cappuccinos, not too frothy.

And for me a barley coffee.

ln a large cup.

With hot water on the side.

What do you think she could give to Gustavo?

- l don't even know what he's like! - Kind of a jerk.

You need something original, something striking.

A roof tile!

l know, some nail polish!

- For Gustavo? He's a man! - So?

What do you mean? We're in the third millennium!

Modern guys no longer hide their femininity!

Today men wear make-up, wax, go to the beautician.

And wear nail polish. Like Beckham!

- Even the idea of Gustavo with nail polish is a nightmare. - Babe?

What do you think, should we tell her now?

Maybe it would be better to wait.

Tell me what?

Some news. Some big news.

- Well, it's not really.... - Shall l?

Ready?

ln two months..

..Paolo and l..

..are getting married.

- To each other? - Well, l should hope so. Ah, wait!

You have to give me some advice. Do you prefer this on ivory..

..or black on dark blue? - Maybe black on dark blue, right?

Clearly you'll be my maid of honor. lsn't it brilliant news?

Brilliant!

Hi, Lucia, it's Paolo, and... l wanted to know how you were.

You know, Maria is sometimes a little too....

l wanted to tell you myself. Call me back?

The quarry is scarce and has grown very, very cunning.

So the strategy for this evening is: say nothing intelligent,..

..observe closely and make few mistakes.

Welcome to my party, girls!

- Hi. - Hi. Have we met?

No, but Paolo has told me a lot about you.

Ah, l do feel positive karma, really positive.

- Oh, here's Paolo! - Hey there!

The genius of the court, as it were. Didn't know you had two girlfriends.

lnteresting choice!

Actually, that's Maria, my fiancee, and this is....

....Lucia, just a friend.

- This is a present for you. - Merci beaucoup.

l hope it's not a book, l've already got one!

Have fun, make yourselves at home, mine!

Here you go.

Well? What did you think of Gustavo?

Right, let's forget it. And that guy over there?

- But that's depressing! Come on! - l was joking, silly!

l've got it, the professor! That guy there!

ls it possible that you never like anyone?

So? How's it going?

- Excuse me, off to the bathroom. Hold this for me, please? - Sure.

- l'll leave you my bag. - Okay.

Look at what she's done to me! Even a barrette!

- Really not bad. - What are you doing here?

lt's still my house, isn't it?

What would you say to a nice relaxing bath, Maria?

Come on, l was joking! By the way, they tell me you work in..

..the seductive world of show business...

No, advertising. And anyway, my name is Lucia.

Oh, advertising! l like it because it lasts 30 seconds.

You see it, you like it, you don't, and there goes a new one.

Everything in life should last 30 seconds, hmm?

Try Viagra, they say it helps.

How l love you creative types!

- Okay, l'm leaving. - Already?

l've got a Tai Chi lesson early tomorrow morning.

- l'll go with you. - No, no, l'll take Lucia's car.

Excuse me. Excuse me!

This way someone will have to take her home.

- Bye, sweetie! - Bye.

- Hi, where do l know you from? - Group therapy? - No.

- Then you've mixed me up with someone else. - No, wait we met....

Where do l know you from? Group therapy?

- Alcoholics Anonymous? - Shall we dance? - Let's.

- Maybe it was in sewing class. - Nice one!

- Aren't you drinking a bit too much? - And you?

Hey guys! Off with your undies!

l love you...

l love you...

Shit!

Good morning. Up already?

Morning. lt's really late.

Sorry, but l have a lawsuit with the hospital,..

..and l haven't fed my cat.

My bike is double-parked...

l made you French toast.

Thanks. Listen, l'll call you later. Bye.

l was forgetting something.

- ls there coffee, too? - Yes.

l was being a real jerk, sorry.

No problem. You had a panic attack.

A panic attack, exactly. And you understood.

You manage to understand me, it's always been like that.

- And l know what you're thinking now. - You do?

lt's the same thing l'm thinking.

You'll see, even if it's difficult, we'll find the right words.

Sorry, what words?

The words to tell Maria, to explain about us.

- You're joking, right? - No.

Lucia, listen.

What happened was inevitable.

We knew it would happen, and it was fantastic.

Perhaps we just chose the wrong moment.

But as far as Maria, she's not going to know,..

..because we're not telling her anything. Nothing ever happened.

lt'll remain our little secret.

Paolo, we love each other.

You said ''l love you'', last night, you said it.

l said that? Well, if l said it...

Look, sorry, l really have to go. l mean it, eh?

Our secret.

Bye.

Everything okay? Good, because it's crazy here this morning.

You have to select the models,..

..check the story-boards and Maria is on line 3.

Tell her l'm not here. l need some coffee.

Ms. Ferrari hasn't gotten in yet, l'm sorry. Good bye.