Hadi Ä°nÅŸallah (Hadi İnşallah)

No, I'm not the one who is kissing.

I'm this one.

The one who's been dumped.

I was supposed to live through so much and get into adventures...

What a big surprise!

Hug her! You, hug him back!

Even propose right at the bus terminal.

You’ve got to be kidding me!

Are you doing this to spite me?

My guy from Ankara. My guy from Ankara is here.

My first love, black-browed...

Miss, have a seat.

Darling!

Didn't you forget something? I couldn't leave you like this.

We promised each other.

He's going down on his knees, he's going to propose.

You promised to pay half of the internet bill.

You thought you could escape, sneaky?

128 liras.

If you don't trust me, you can see with your own eyes.

Did you come here for this?

Did you come here for this?

Of course, it's not only this.

What else?

To send blockhead Mahmut off to his military service.

Hooray!

Auntie!

I'll show you "auntie"!

God damn you!

You are such an animal! Take this and accept it as charity.

-20, 30, 50, 55. -Are you counting?

Take this, you can eat gözleme.

I don't want to stop the national belly movement.

Last call for İzmir passengers!

He's even dancing.

Let me go!

İZMİR MUNICIPALITY

My dear hometown.

My İzmir.

There's no place like home.

This is the street that I grew up in.

I confessed my love for the first time on that corner.

-Let's get married. -Boys can't marry boys.

I'm not a boy. I'm a girl, OK?

Here, my dad caught me in the act with a boy, for the first time.

Sorry, do you have change?

-Hey! -Dad?

How dare you walk around with your lover?

You think I'm only enough for a dope head?

Take this, and leave here right away.

Thanks, man.

See how he left you when he got some money?

Ugh, Dad!

I still feel embarrassed.

And here is the place where my boyfriend dropped me home for the first time.

Is this what you call stealing your old man's car for a ride?

Look here! How much is one kilo of tomatoes?

How much is one kilo of tomatoes? God!

You scared her off!

Shoes? Unless...

My dad is dead!

Open the door! I want to see him for the last time!

-Dad! -God!

-Auntie, my dad is dead! -Honey, you're home!

-Why didn't you tell me? I loved him. -Shut your mouth.

-He was my dad! -Shut up! God forbid!

Why would he be dead, you maniac?

-There are shoes here. -We're having fun with the girls.

Thank God. Nothing can kill me now.

Except for that. You're like 700 pounds.

-Where's your luggage? -Hey, hey!

Welcome.

I've missed you!

-Auntie? What is that? -She is wearing a scarf now.

I'd say you're beautiful, but since I've just returned from hajj,

it's not appropriate for me to lie.

May Allah accept, Hadji Şenay. What can I say?

-You went to school in Ankara. -Don't eat!

Don't you have a boyfriend?

I did have one, but...

You ate him as well, piggy?

Leave her alone! Why did you guys break up?

Our relationship...

...wasn't so good. So we agreed to break up.

Since you agreed on something, why did you break up?

But...

Did he cheat on you?

With my best friend.

How so? With Faruk?

-Yes. -Did he turn gay because of you?

Not at all!

He went to some Russian girls. Faruk confessed to me.

-What? -Oh, what a drama!

It's like a soap opera. Play us something on Sputify.

It's not Sputify, it's Spotify.

-Overlock machine is here. That's it. -Let's go.

Honey.

Your skirts should be a bit longer.

Şenay, sorry, but you were wearing miniskirts yourself.

And you shouldn't leave the bread on the floor!

Why can't I go to fortuneteller cafés?

It's not that, honey, but why go as a fortuneteller?

But I made 60 liras in one hour.

Is it that profitable?

Hi. And you're running from the police!

Are you a beggar?

Why didn't you surrender? Who will rescue you from me?

Honey?

My sister.

Pucca is here!

-Sister! Welcome! -I've missed you so much!

My dear girl.

Tell me something, Dad.

Tell me something, and set me free.

Give me a cigarette.

Dad, I don't smoke.

-I was testing you. -I'll prepare us some coffee.

You can't tell fortunes until tonight, OK?

-Did you finish your school? -Yes.

And you were planning on getting married?

Not anymore.

And I'm done with you.

Come work with me.

Attention ladies.

Overlock machine is here.

We can overlock your carpets, rugs, door mats.

Attention...

No way, Dad. I have a degree. I'll practice my profession.

Do you have a job?

What happened to not being a pushy father?

I'm depressed now. What if I run away?

What if I end up being kidnapped by the bad guys

and was forced to beg after they cut my limbs off?

What if I get hit by a car, And an ambulance doesn't come?

What am I talking about?

No, I'm not good at all.

I'm terrible, Dad.

I really was terrible.

YILDIZ TİLBE SYNDROME

First, I needed to overcome some syndromes.

What is that?

It's chocolate.

Why don't you call me? Call me!

İBRAHİM TATLISES SYNDROME

You can't get away with it Believe in karma

DEMET AKALIN SYNDROME

-How are you, honey? -What have you done?

Enough of this depression! I'm going to meet some new guy.

Where did you meet him? When?

On a Facebook group, "Why are we alone when even butts have two cheeks."

See his nickname? Satisfactor1907.

Whoa! He is just for you. Maybe it was his grandfather's name.

What is that?

-She's meeting someone from the internet. -Internet?

They'll steal your kidney! God forbid!

-We're coming too, for some fresh air. -Yes.

-Don't screw this up! -No way.

We're going to rock!

Eyes...

-Where were you? -I was dancing over there.

Where is this Satisfactor of yours?

-I brought my pepper spray for nothing? -Don't ask about it! He was 12 years old.

-What? -See,

he can only satisfy himself.

Oh, he's so cute!

-Girls! -What?

-Keep it low. This guy... -What?

I said, "Keep it low!" This guy over there is checking you out.

Where? Which one?

Wow, what kind of look is that? He's going to eat you up.

Is he looking at me or you? I can't tell because of the glasses.

He's looking at me!

He's pretending that nut is me, I can feel it.

Look, this time, play hard to get. Don't do anything stupid!

I won't. I'm going to meet him now.

No!

Oh, you men...

You check women out all night long as if you're watching a derby,

but you don't attempt to do anything.

Am I right?

Yes, you're right. I love your voice.

-What? -I love your voice.

What else?

What are you doing? Hey! What...

Do this.

Your lips are very nice. Fleshy.

What about your eyes?

Very nice! Let me see.

I got screwed!

They say the blind keep the one they find. You can't go anywhere!

I'm not going. I'm going to freshen up and come back.

Fuck that! I can't see make up.

I'm not doing it for you. I'm doing it for myself.

Shove those lips back in!

Where are you going?

-What happened? -Let's go, quick!

-Why? -I'll tell you, come on!

Are you leaving?

Because I'm blind, right?

-Because I'm blind. -How can you say that?