On Becoming a God in Central Florida

Previously...

This is the house of a Silver Washington distributor.

Hmm.

- Splashercize is a hit. - Mm-hmm.

Y'all just stay put.

It's a recruiting tool.

You can tell him I'm improving the Garbeau System.

I need to speak to Obie Garbeau ASA-fucking-P.

'Cause if you were a Washington, you would be invited

to his retreat next week at Paradise Cay.

How do I become a Washington?

I know what you're up to.

What you're doing is dangerous.

You tapped a whole new market.

And I'm going to Paradise Cay.

We went Washington.

And we're gonna get a one-on-one with Obie.

And we're gonna get what we want.

Oftentimes at night,

I dream about America.

I dream about a land so rich in opportunity

that it geysers up from the ground like oil,

bursting to touch the heavens.

I dream of a simpler time...

... when Injuns roamed,

and Buffalo Bill and Annie Oakley were out there

keeping the West good and wild.

And thanks to the Garbeau System, when I wake up in whatever home

of mine I've laid my head down in, it's like I'm still dreaming.

Maybe you dream of luxury.

Caviar for breakfast, Kobe beef for lunch.

Speeding down the highway in that Italian car with that Italian gal.

Owning your life so your life doesn't own you.

I'm so glad you're taking a vacation.

Paradise Cay is not a vacation.

I'm only going so I can get my Splashercize class back.

Well, it sounds tropical.

Oh...

A weekend away won't mean anything.

Destinee's gonna grow up knowing

her mama's a hard-working lady.

- You think? - I know.

Mama's got to go. I love you.

Mmm-mmm-mmm, give me sugar.

I love you.

- All right. Thank y'all. Bye. - Ah.

- Go get 'em, girl. - Of course.

- Okay. - You say, "Bye-bye, Mama"?

Say "Bye-bye, Mama.

Bye-bye."

My grandpa used to say to me,

"Obie, you got a penny, you save that penny

for a rainy day, and by gosh, it'll be worth a nickel."

And that's why I love rainy days...

'cause one day, a big storm might come.

And if you don't have those nickels saved up,

you're gonna get washed away.

Who gets it done?

FAM, Washington.

Who gets it done?

FAM, Washington.

Who gets it done?

FAM, Washington.

Who gets it done?

FAM, Washington.

Who gets it done?

FAM, Washington.

Who gets it done?

FAM, Washington.

Who gets it done?

- FAM, Washington. - FAM, Washington.

- Hi. - When we get in there

and find Obie, you just let me do the talking, okay?

Oh, no. No can do.

You don't just walk up to Obie Garbeau II, Krystal.

You have to be invited.

What do you notice about all these Washingtons?

They're all white.

Couples. They're all couples.

- FAM values, family values. Yes. - Family values.

You know we're sharing a room, right?

Oh, here we are. Paradise Cay.

Look at this.

- How you doing? - Hi.

- Come on in. - Who gets it done?

FAM, Washington.

Who gets it done? FAM, Washington.

Who gets it done?

FAM, Washington.

Who gets it done? FAM, Washington.

Who gets it done?

FAM, Washington.

Welcome to Paradise Cay.

You all worked hard to get here,

and the work has just begun.

You all might recognize me from the brochures.

I'm Harmony.

It's my pleasure to be your emcee

during your stay here in Paradise.

Now, if every couple

could send their man to check in,

the women can have a drink.

- How are you, dear? - Good to see you.

I'm guessing there's no booze in this?

Your hair looks real nice.

Where do you think Obie's at?

I don't know.

Probably off somewhere closing a multimillion-dollar deal.

I said I really like your hair like that.

I heard you the first time.

I'll go get us our room.

Welcome, yeah.

Roger.

I want to talk to Obie.

Everybody does.

- Thank you. - Next.

Hi. Um, keys for Cody Bonar

- and, um... - Absolutely.

Krystal Stubbs. She's my, uh...

She's my lady.

- She's my-my partner. - Mm.

- Right. - My lady partner.

Can you believe that?

Mm-hmm.

- What is this? - Hey!

That's, uh, for Obie.

Well, that's one way to get his attention.

Can I have it back?

There's no need to be shy, Krystal.

Carol made a gift for Obie, too.

Well, I just wanted to thank Obie

for the extraordinary wealth that FAM has given us.

It says, "Be a peli-can, not a peli-can't."

She stitched it herself.

Isn't she a stitch?

Aw...

Well, Krystal, darling, I hope you don't have your heart set

on meeting with Obie.

You know, he only meets with one couple.

How does he decide who to meet?

Well, it's sort of like a competition.

Okay, so when's the competition start?

Honey, it already has.

I got our keys.

Got these cool name tags.

You ready? You want to check out our room?

I heard the sheets have a very high thread count.

Wow.

Oh, they're beautiful.

I think they're creepy.

Hmm.

Quality spread.

So, are we sleeping head to toe or...

Will you zip it?

- I'm calling Destinee. - Zipped.

Why aren't they answering?

You know, I love how your nails are like cute little claws.

Cody! Can you just... be less you?

I need a minute.

Sorry.

I'll go change.

I'm sorry.

Okay.

We need to strategize what we're gonna say to Obie.

You don't lay these kinds of things on a man

like Obie Garbeau.

Honey, something is wrong.

We should be making six figures,

not taking out a second mortgage.

You quit your practice.

If you go negative on FAM, what are you gonna do next, hmm?

Mow lawns?

What's that?

My new dress... for the banquet.

Like it?

I won't cut the tags.

I love you, you know.

I know it.

Mm.

Hey.

Let's crush these losers.

You don't have to apologize all the time, you know.

Yeah, I know.

I get on your nerves.

Yeah, you drive me crazy, but who cares?

I care.

What?

Come out here.

I said I care.

Put your pants on.

I'm sorry.

Sorry.

Why do you care, Cody?

Because when... when we...

When you let me...

Cody.

That was special to me.

We should get going.

Yeah, yeah. Can't be late.

Let me see you in this.