Nathan for You

My name is Nathan Fielder,

and I graduated from one of Canada's top business schools

with really good grades.

Now, I'm using my knowledge to help struggling small business owners

to make it in this competitive world.

This is Nathan for You .

Greg Boodaghian works in an industry

where dishonesty runs rampant.

And that makes the fact that I first thought his business was called

"Gay Auto Repair" the least of his worries.

His biggest problem? Customers not trusting him.

I do have clients like that, then.

Once they enter here,

they think that I'm ready to rip them off.

Greg seemed like an honest mechanic,

but before helping him, I needed to be sure.

So I baked him some cookies with salt instead of sugar

to see if he'd be honest about the taste,

and the next day, I paid him a visit at his shop

in Glendale, California, with my homemade treats.

I have a little surprise for you.

I baked you these cookies.

- For me? - Yeah.

So feel free to have one.

Sure.

- Who made it? You made it? - Mm-hmm.

What do you think?

- Very good. - You like it?

I like it. Yeah, a little salty. Different.

Good enough.

The plan: for Greg to promote that he's an honest mechanic

by only giving estimates while hooked up to a lie detector.

I never thought of that, but, you know, it's--

Something like this won't only make you look more honest,

But it will make your competitors look more dishonest

because it'll make everyone in the city go,

"Well, why isn't my mechanic hooked up to a polygraph?

I want to go to the guy who is."

Probably, yeah. People will think that way.

Yeah. Yeah.

Greg seemed into my idea, and that meant I needed to find

a reliable polygraph machine for him to use.

Do you want another one?

- Oh, I'll take it later. - Have another one now.

No? - No.

So I tracked down a local polygraph operator

and met up with him at my office to put his machine to the test.

Answer the following questions truthfully, okay?

Mm-hmm.

- Is today Thursday? - Yes.

Are you currently sitting down?

Yes.

Have you ever used pornography to pleasure yourself?

Is that a standard question?

Try to not talk between questions.

Have you ever used online pornography

or pornography to pleasure yourself?

No.

Okay.

Deceptive.

Well, I don't know about that 100%.

I don't look at pornography, so it was obvious

that Gene's old machine was too inaccurate to use with Greg.

So I sought out a different polygraph operator

who claimed to have the most up-to-date equipment.

Honestly, this machine looked like

something out of the 1500s.

- It was like... - Yeah,

- those are only 80% accurate. - Right.

So what I want to do today, along with testing your machine,

is to show that I was telling the truth in that situation

and that I don't watch online pornography.

Okay.

And once I was all hooked up,

I was ready to take on the hard questions.

Do you live in Wisconsin?

- No. - Pass.

Do you ever look at pornography on the internet?

No.

Fail.

I--I s--

Have you ever pleasured yourself

while watching pornography on the internet?

No.

Fail.

Do you need to reboot the computer or something?

There's no-- nothing to reboot.

It's rolling.

'cause I noticed your computer is a Dell.

- So I don't know... - Computer's a Toshiba.

- It never glitches? - No.

You're failing, I and I think it's 'cause you're lying.

- But it's weird for me a little bit when I'm telling the truth

and the computer is saying I'm lying.

and on top of that, it's a Toshiba.

Small green mountain, small green mountain,

giant green mountain.

- What was that question for? - Porn.

Do you ever watch porn on the internet?

Is that a Windows 95?

Oh, Jesus, dude. You're graspin' at straws.

The operating system has nothing to do

with what you're shooting out.

And it's not Windows 95.

- XP? - Yes.

Still, it's not the most recent operating system, I don't think.

Despite the inaccuracy of John's dated machine,

we had to go with him since there weren't

any other operators in the area.

- See you later. - Bye.

Back at G&Y, I had a surprise in store for Greg.

- I got you that sign. - All right, that's cool.

- Yeah? - Yeah.

With the sign in place, it was finally time for Greg

to try out his new honest approach with customers.

- Hi, how are you? - Hey. Hi.

- We have a special today. - Okay.

We accept a polygraph test when we give you...

Oh, wow.

When we give you the estimates.

So if you want a-- you're willing to--

That sounds great. Yeah.

Customers seemed excited about the promotion,

and after a thorough inspection, Greg gave his quote.

The rear, you have, like, 5% left.

Okay.

While John, our polygraph examiner, took notes.

Now it was time to put Greg's honesty to the test.

- Is today Sunday? - No.

True.

Do the rear brake pads only have 5% left?

- Yes. - True.

Is $180 a fair price to replace an ABS sensor?

- Yes. - True.

Okay.

So based on those answers, how do you feel about your estimate?

Yeah, it's-- he sounds truthful.

Keep in mind, too, that yesterday

when he did a test on me, it said that I, you know,

pleasured myself to pornography, and I don't do that.

So-- just keep in mind...

Oh, really?

- It's not fully accurate 100%. - Okay.

It's like, you know, run on a Toshiba laptop with XP, so--

it's 98% accurate,

and he has pleasured himself to porn on the internet.

No, that's-- we had-- we determined yesterday

that that was possibly a glitch with the machine, or--

No, I disputed that right away.

There is absolutely no way you were telling the truth

on the two questions you failed.

Okay.

I'm just trying to establish there is some uncertainty,

and, you know, to--

There's absolutely no uncertainty.

Your body exploded on those two questions across--

But we don't know 100% that my body exploded.

It is the computer that's showing...

Oh, it was 100% your body.

You keep trying to blame it on Windows this and programs.

It was your body. You failed.

There is no doubt you have watched porn on the Internet

at some time in your life, and there is zero doubt--

Well, maybe he just--

Maybe he was uncomfortable with the question.

- No. - No?

I was uncomfortable with the question, though.

So thank you.

Despite the accuracy problems with John's machine,

more and more customers seemed to enjoy

their polygraph-verified quotes.

Did you find a loose vacuum hose and you reattached it?

Yes.

True.

So as you can see, the things he quoted you in the estimate

were exactly things that are actually problems with your car,

and you do need, and you know that.

But if you go anywhere else, you won't know that.

Right.

Sounds like a winner.

I was so proud that I could finally help Greg

profit from his honesty, and at the end of the day,

I wanted to see what he thought of the whole experience.

Were you happy with everything that I did?

We were happy, yes. We were happy, so--

Yeah.

Do you mind if I ask you that

while hooked up to the polygraph?

- Sure. - Yeah?

So were you happy with everything I did for you today?

Yes.

True.

One more question.

Would you ever want to hang out sometime

socially with me outside of this?

No.

True.

Hmm.

Okay.

Well, thank you, and--yeah, thank you for your honesty.