She Loves Me Not

CHARLIE?

Man: ACTUALLY, TELL JEFF TO COME HERE NOW...

YEAH, UM, HAVE YOU SEEN MY ASSISTANT?

HE'S ABOUT THIS TALL, DARK HAIR.

NO.

HE CAN'T HIDE FROM ME, NOT IN MY OWN HOUSE.

Woman: HEY, THIS IS CHARLOTTE. I CAN'T GET TO THE PHONE NOW.

LEAVE A MESSAGE, AND I'LL CALL YOU BACK.

YEAH, WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU?

00 ALREADY.

GIRLS' NIGHT OUT?

OR WERE THERE BOYS TOO?

SOME BOYS, SOME GIRLS. YEAH.

FIGURES.

DID YOU HAVE FUN?

YEP.

HOW IS IT THAT, UM,

THAT YOU DON'T RETURN A SINGLE CALL?

I DON'T KNOW. SERVICE?

RIGHT.

THERE'S NO FOOD IN THERE.

FUCK THE FOOD. WHERE'S THE FUCKIN' ICE?

GODDAMN IT! WHERE'S KARLA?

IF I ASK HER TO DO ONE FUCKING THING FOR ME,

IT'S JUST TO MAKE SURE I'M WELL-STOCKED WITH ICE.

I MEAN, GOD!

KARLA'S OFF. WHY ARE YOU SO UPTIGHT?

I'M NOT UPTIGHT, JUST THIRSTY.

WHAT?

WHAT?

YOU KNOW, I, UM...

I DON'T MIND THAT YOU GO OUT EVERY NIGHT.

IT'D JUST BE NICE IF YOU RETURNED A CALL

NOW AND AGAIN.

YOU KNOW?

JUST SO I KNOW YOU'RE ALL RIGHT.

HERE. SHAKE IT.

ENOUGH?

FILL IT UP. COME ON. COME ON.

OH, IT'S MAKING ME SICK.

WELL, HERE.

COME ON. VITAMIN C. IT'LL HELP YOU WITH THE HANGOVER.

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? TRUST ME.

I DON'T WANT IT.

OKAY.

AH, YOU'RE MISSING OUT.

I MAKE ONE HELL OF A MARTINI.

BY THE WAY,

WHO TOLD YOU YOU COULD BORROW MY CAR EVERY SINGLE NIGHT?

WHAT IF I HAVE TO GO SOMEWHERE? WHERE ARE YOU GONNA GO?

SOMEWHERE. ANYWHERE. WHERE ARE YOU GONNA GO?

YOU LOST YOUR LICENSE.

NO, I DIDN'T. I HAVE MY LICENSE.

OKAY, WHATEVER.

DID YOU GET LAID LAST NIGHT?

THAT'S FUNNY, HUH? FUNNY. WHY, DID YOU?

WHAT, LADIES NEVER TELL?

I HAVE TO SHOWER.

YEAH, THAT'S PROBABLY A GOOD IDEA. YOU KNOW WHY?

'CAUSE YOUR FACE IS STARTING TO RUN OFF YOUR FACE.

WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?

YOU KIDDING ME?

SHIT!

UH-HUH. UH-HUH. I UNDERSTAND.

HOW MANY OF THESE DO I HAVE TO SIGN?

THE WHOLE BOX?

WHY?

OH, GOD.

I'M TRYING TO SWITCH GENRES, PATTY.

I NEED NEW MATERIAL. THE FUCKING WATER'S OFF.

PATTY, I NEED TO CALL YOU BACK.

YES, YES. I'LL SIGN THEM. I'LL SIGN THEM.

ALL RIGHT, BYE.

WHAT? THE WATER IS OFF.

WELL, GO USE MY SHOWER THEN.

AND AFTER THAT, I NEED YOU TO HELP ME SIGN THESE BOOKS.

THE WATER IS GOING TO BE

OFF IN YOUR BATHROOM TOO.

WHAT IS THAT, ANOTHER REX STEPHENS CLASSIC?

I WROTE THIS BEFORE YOU EVEN HIT PUBERTY.

AND, YES, SOME PEOPLE CALL IT A CLASSIC.

OKAY, NOW, HEMINGWAY WAS A CLASSIC. STEINBECK.

NOT REX STEPHENS.

I MEAN, EVEN BUKOWSKI, IF YOU ASK ME.

I LIKE THOSE PEOPLE TOO. I'M SURE YOU DO.

WHAT, DID YOU THINK I WAS GONNA WALK ALL THE WAY DOWN HERE NAKED?

WHY'D YOU MAKE ME GET OFF THE PHONE, CHARLOTTE? THAT WAS BUSINESS.

BECAUSE THE FUCKING WATER IS OFF.

WHO WAS THAT? YOUR PUBLISHER?

AGENT, PUBLISHER, BLOODSUCKING BOTTOM-FEEDER. WHICHEVER YOU PREFER.

DID YOU READ MY BOOK?

I'M IN A PERIOD OF TRANSITION.

I'M LEAVING THEM. THEY JUST DON'T KNOW IT YET.

RIGHT.

SO...

YOU DIDN'T READ MY BOOK, DID YOU?

COME ON. LET'S NOT GO THROUGH ALL THIS AGAIN.

YOU'RE NOT THE ONLY WRITER IN TOWN, YOU KNOW.

OKAY, LOOK. WHY DON'T YOU GO TAKE A SWIM,

AND I'LL BE DOWN IN A FEW MINUTES--

GET ME AN AGENT.

OKAY. I WILL.

AND I AM THE ONLY WRITER IN TOWN.

ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT.

GOT IT.

CHARLOTTE.

GOT IT.

SEE? THERE IT IS. YEAH? YEAH?

DID YOU WIPE THE DUST OFF FIRST?

ALL GONE.

YOU DIDN'T READ MY STORY.

I'VE BEEN BUSY WITH THE HOUSE

AND ALL THIS BULLSHIT.

I'M SPENDING MILLIONS ON THIS PLACE.

GOT THE PAINTERS COMING NEXT WEEK.

HAVE YOU ANY IDEA HOW MUCH IT COSTS TO PAINT A WHOLE HOUSE?

PUT LOTION ON MY BACK?

A FUCKING SHITLOAD.

WHICH REMINDS ME...

I NEED YOU TO PICK A COLOR FOR YOUR ROOM.

WHATEVER YOU WANT.

NO.

IT'S WHATEVER YOU WANT.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT COLORS GIRLS LIKE.

THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING.

IT'S YOUR ROOM. HAVE SOME FUN WITH IT.

READ MY FUCKING STORY, BRADY.

OKAY, THAT IS ALL I ASK. JUST READ IT.

I WILL,

AS SOON AS YOU PICK A COLOR. PLUM.

PLUM. PAINT MY ROOM PLUM.

PLUM-- YOU MEAN, UH, PURPLE?

PURPLE, PLUM, PINK, LAVENDER, WHATEVER.

WHAT DOES THAT MEAN, "WHATEVER"?

YOU KEEP USING THAT WORD. I HATE THAT WORD!

IT'S NOT EVEN IN THE THESAURUS.

IT'S IN THE DICTIONARY. LOOK IT UP.

YOU'RE NOT GONNA READ MY STORY, ARE YOU, BRADY?

IT'S NOT ABOUT WHO READS IT, CHARLOTTE. IT'S ABOUT THE WRITING.

WHO CARES WHAT I THINK?

I DON'T EVEN LIKE MY OWN STUFF.

REX STEPHENS IS A FAKE.

PAINT MY ROOM PLUM.

OKAY, FINE.

I CAN'T WORK OUT HERE EITHER. IT'S TOO FUCKING HOT.

HEY, DUDE, THAT GIRL'S BACK OUT IN THE POOL AGAIN.

ARE YOU SERIOUS? YEAH.

OH, THIS IS GONNA BE A GOOD DAY!

WORKING HARD?

SORT OF.

HOW ABOUT YOU?

SORT OF.

DO I KNOW YOU?

I'VE BEEN HERE EVERY SINGLE DAY FOR THE PAST MONTH.

I WATCH YOU GUYS FROM RIGHT HERE ALL THE TIME.

YOU SHOULD COME IN.

I THOUGHT THE POOL WAS OFF LIMITS.

WHATEVER. IT'S HOT.

COME ON. IT FEELS GOOD.

YOU CAN BLAME IT ON ME.

COME ON, TAKE YOUR CLOTHES OFF.

ALL RIGHT.

THANK YOU. GOOD, RIGHT?

COME HERE.

OKAY. COME ON.

THIS IS NICE. THANK YOU.

ARE YOU NERVOUS?

NO, I'M NOT NERVOUS. WHY WOULD I BE? YOU SEEM NERVOUS.

SO, HOW DO YOU KNOW MR. OLINSON THERE?

HE CAME IN AND SPOKE AT ONE OF OUR CLASSES.

YOU KNOW WHO REX STEPHENS IS?

NO. ARE YOU SERIOUS?

THE WRITER, REX...

REX STEPHENS, THE WRITER,

REX STEPHENS, THIS IS HIS HOUSE.

OH! THE FAMOUS...

YEAH. REX STEPHENS.

"FAMOUS"-- MORE LIKE "INFAMOUS."

RIGHT.

CRAZY. THAT'S COOL.

SO YOU, LIKE, "WORK" FOR HIM OR...

I AM KIND OF LIKE HIS EDITOR.

HIS EDITOR? MM-HMM.

YOU'RE HIS EDITOR? MM-HMM. I AM.

REALLY?

CAN I GO DIVING? YEAH.

SHUT UP! SHUT UP!

Charlotte: GO!

HEY, WHERE ARE YOU GOING?

YES? WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT ALL ABOUT?

WHAT?

THE POOL PARTY. NOTHING.

PLEASE. DON'T PULL THAT WITH ME.

YOU THINK YOU CAN DO THAT UNDER MY NOSE AND GET AWAY WITH IT?

DO WHAT?

I SAW YOU SCREWING AROUND

WITH SOME KID IN THE POOL.

OKAY, WE WERE JUST SWIMMING.

I DON'T LIKE STRANGERS IN MY POOL, CHARLOTTE.

HE'S NOT A STRANGER, HE'S WORKING FOR YOU, YOU IDIOT.