How to Make It in America

You hungry?

I make really good eggs.

I am, but I should probably

go back to Brooklyn and change, right?

I mean, it'd be weird if I showed up in the same clothes as last night.

I guess.

- Are you pouting? - No.

Mm-mm.

Fuck.

See you at the office.

Oh my God. All right, I'll see you soon.

Mmm, have a nice ride back.

Oh, I am so hung over.

You missed the best time last night, Ben.

So what's the deal? What's going on with those espadrilles?

We'll get them in when Pham fixes the strap problem.

- They'll still be fucking unwearable. - I know.

Okay, so...

Gadzooks wants 5500 pieces shipped for spring.

- 5500? - Mm-hmm.

5500 units of Crisp?

Kirsten: Yep, and because you guys have never worked with us before

or had an order of this size, we want Crisp

to use a manufacturer that we trust.

Yeah, we'd like for you guys to use Yosi.

Kirsten: Keep it in the family.

I'm sorry, who's Yosi?

He's Nancy's husband.

I thought you guys knew him.

You're married?

Yes, of course.

He does manufacturing for three brands in our store already,

so he ships to us regularly, on time.

- It'll be a piece of cake. - His flight gets in at 11:00.

- I can set up a meeting this afternoon. - Perfect.

Yay! You guys are gonna love Yosi. Right, Nancy?

He is the best.

Yosi- that's an Israeli name, right?

I think so, yeah.

Are all Israelis Jewish?

I don't know.

That's your motherland right there.

How you don't know about your own peoples?

I'm a reconstructionist Jew.

The Upper West Side is my motherland.

I'm just trying to get a read on this dude.

You don't think it's a conflict of interest that he's working with his wife?

Yeah, maybe, but doesn't really seem like we have a choice, do we?

It's just a little shady to me.

I mean, what if something were to happen with the order?

Is Yosi gonna have our backs or his own wife's?

What's gonna happen with the order?

Shit always happens.

I fucked Nancy last night.

You almost had me.

That's funny.

Hello.

Nilda here?

They moved out last week.

Nilda, one of your buddies is here.

- Hi. - Want to come outside?

Come in for a second.

For real?

Ma, this is Tiffany.

She's having problems with her moms.

Can she stay with us for a little?

If her mom says okay, she can stay on the couch.

Come on, ma.

Angelo slept on the couch. That's the rule in my house.

You said Angelo had to sleep on the couch

'cause you don't want me getting pregnant.

Me and Tiffany aren't getting pregnant.

What? What do you mean he ain't gonna re-up?

It's not about pregnant. It's about proper.

I'm closing a major deal today with Vert America

and you knuckleheads can't get $500 from a bodega?

That lying motherfucker said what?

Oh, excuse me.

Jabar: Cruz is freaking out.

He said some dreads came in, took everything off the shelves

and poured it out in the aisles- something about it being anti-Jamaican.

That's bullshit, man.

The dreads told Cruz that they want to sit down with you.

What do you want me to tell them?

You tell them I don't negotiate with terrorists.

Seriously, David, man the fuck up.

Yeah. No, you can afford the ring.

I don't know. I guess you just don't want to marry me.

No, honey, I do know what I'm talking about.

Yes, I check your online banking.

Okay, listen, I can't really talk about this right now.

I have somebody in my office. Mm-hmm.

Ooh, infuriating.

- Hi. - Hi.

You look awfully peppy today.

I am, thanks.

I have a story idea for you.

Oh, go.

I went to this dinner party last night out in Bushwick.

And it was for these fashion guys. You know the New York Neanderthals?

Okay.

They live in this huge Victorian.

And they grow their own grapes and pickles and-

Cool. What else you got?

So after dinner all of us get on bikes and we start riding.

No no no no, I'm saying what other ideas do you have?

That sounds a little too grungy.

Robin, I think this is a really great idea for us.

No.

But I do have something else super fun for you to write.

Sheila Shapiro just opened a storefront-

a wonderful little caterer in Union Square- called Noshables.

I want you to go meet her, give me 500 words on it.

And please, Rachel, be nice to her.

Don't hostile-face her.

I'm hoping she gives me a deal on my wedding cake,

if I ever fucking get engaged.

Pussy boy.

Maybe I'll get a desk like this for our office.

Would you stop fucking around, Cam? Get up.

Which one of you two is Ben Epstein?

Hey, Yosi. It's nice to meet you.

You motherfucker.

You designed my favorite fucking sweatshirt

and I don't have the license for Crisp.

You're killing me with that talent.

Cam, nice to meet you. Nancy says great things about you.

We love Nancy.

Yeah, everybody loves my wife.

Come on, I'll take you on a tour.

When I first started working with Christian Noshables,

he had just left Lee, not a pot to piss in.

Now he owns Michael Jackson's house.

People call me a starmaker.

I'm not bragging,

but I've made a lot of people rich and famous.

No, Enzo, I told you, use the chain stitch hem, huh?

- Si si. - Come on, let's go.

I found him working at the Ferragamo store in Rome 10 years ago,

brought him here and gave him an opportunity.

Now Enzo is the best tailor in New York City.

See, that's what I love to do-

find talented young people and help them grow.

Maybe there's an opportunity for you to grow here.

Hey, Peter, hold on.

Okay, so what did you have in mind?

Well, we start with the Gadzooks deal and go from there.

But with your talent, I believe Crisp could do an Ed Hardy.

$150 million in sales, no rhinestones.

Huh.

Well, how would the Gadzooks deal work?

I cover all production costs.

You don't go in your pocket for a dime.

Then we split the profits 50/50.

And depending on where we source the loopwheeler cotton,

you should take home $200,000-250,000 on this one.

Come on, guys. I want to show you something.

This is the first thing I did when I bought this building-

I built a basketball court.

I love this game.

I briefly played pro in Israel-

the best three years of my life.

- Cam: Whoo! - Thank you.

So here are the terms for you to review

and here is a little something

to show you how confident I am

about the future of Crisp-

an advance against future earnings.

Cam: $10,000?

Yosi, would it be cool

if Cam and I just discussed this and then got back to you?

Oh sure. You're smart guys.

The ball is in your court.

Thank you.

And my wife is throwing a birthday party

for me tomorrow night-

a big one. I hope you can make it.

- Most definitely, yes. - Yeah, sure.

Announcer over P.A.: Attention, ladies and gentlemen.

This train will now be running express to Brooklyn.

Next stop, Borough Hall.

- Let me ask you a question. - Yeah.

If Kapo okays the contract, do you think

it'll look desperate if I cash my advance today?

So now you don't think it's shady to work with a husband and wife anymore?

I do, but whatever.

Hey, everybody's in bed with everybody, right?

Yeah.

And I- I was in bed with Nancy last night.

You said that joke already.

Yeah. And this morning too, man.

I'm serious.