Bloodbrothers

Saturday night ain't the same--

not like the old days.

Bullshit, you old fart.

Saturday night is Saturday night.

What else is there? A good fucking broad.

Honest to god, I saw it.

You're still full of shit.

"Look, taking out the garbage is your job."

Scotch and water, please.

Hey, Tommy.

Bob Sherman sends his regards from Saudi Arabia.

Look at that card.

What the hell's he doing

in Saudi Arabia?

Straw boss of the Arab electricians.

Some hotel going up.

Says he got winked off by a one-eyed whore.

That old fart ain't come in years.

He wakes up in the morning with a piss hard-on,

he's a happy man.

Hey, Chub!

Chub! Over here!

Hey, yo! Chub.

Hey, Chub!

How are you?

Good. Give me a scotch.

Where is she?

"Where is she?" Just like that?

No kiss, no nothing--

what?

She'll be here.

She's really good, this chick?

I'm telling you,

she has got a tongue like an anteater.

Ha ha ha ha!

I thought I was going to die.

I had to beg her to stop.

I swear to god.

Oh, I gotta have this chick.

You'll have her. She's a gift.

Hey, I told her what a stud you were.

You did?

Yeah.

I can't do it tonight.

I forgot all about it.

I told Phyllis I'd take her to the movies.

Take her tomorrow.

No, I can't. I promised her, Tommy.

You sound like a teenager.

I tell everybody my brother is a stallion.

He can't get away from his wife?

You really tell everybody what a stallion I am?

Tommy!

Don't look. Here she is.

Sylvia!

In a booth over there.

She's wonderful.

You're going to die when you see this.

What's she drink?

You're not going to the movies?

Give me two scotch in the booth.

Remember what I told you, huh?

Remember what she likes-- Stallone.

Nice, huh?

My asshole brother-in-law.

He is welcome to his discount business.

He's welcome to his house

and his saunas and the pool and the...

The whole bloody farmhouse, kitchen--

yeah, yeah, go ahead.

So you live alone?

Just me and Chauncey. It's my Siamese.

Oh, yeah.

Cats have souls.

Yeah, cats are great.

Nat hated them.

Nat?

That's my husband.

He left me two years ago.

He was a sick man.

He'd have to be sick to leave a pretty dame.

That's for damn sure.

I always pray for him.

You believe in the power of prayer?

See, your brother said you're very spiritual,

but I knew it the minute we met.

It's in your eyes.

Yeah. You're a man with a deep soul,

a man with feelings, with a need--

a hunger to live in the joyous embrace

of the son of god.

Let us bind ourselves

to the perpetual state of grace.

Let us be children again and sin no more.

Let us live forever chaste and forever clean!

Oh, kiss it.

Kiss it!

Douche bag!

Kiss it!

You should have seen your fucking face!

I'll break your goddamn arm!

What the hell is going on?

There. There.

Wait. What the hell are you doing?

Aw, come on, now.

And they're off and running!

Like that?

I got no more!

That's it! That's it!

Hold up. Ok? Enough?

Ok. That's enough.

Now it's enough!

Ha ha ha ha!

Hi, Stony.

Jesus...

If she can hump like she can bump...

Butler, I'll kill him.

No. He's got those two shitheads.

I'll kill him.

I'm going to kill you! Kill you, fuck!

Fuckface! Douche bag!

It's the man with the tan, it's Chili Mac!

Slap me five, man!

Ok, ok.

Everything cool?

Cheri's breaking his balls.

Breaking his balls? Is he climbing the walls?

With his hands on his dick,

and it's making him sick.

Stone, take a run at old three-finger in there.

She's been checking you out for weeks.

I don't want no town pump.

Why don't you take a run at her?

But it's you she's creaming for.

Yeah?

There goes Mott.

It's ok, man. It's nothing.

She's a whore.

Right, right, right.

I really hate this.

Getting him that fucking union card

has been a real ball buster.

Red tape up to my ass.

I'll call Fegan tomorrow.

That Mick-- he thinks who he is.

You tell him he don't come through,

I'll break his arm. Right?

Yeah, right, right.

I figure Stony, he puts in

his four years apprentice,

no. He'll be 23 when he turns journeyman.

Journeyman's base is 13-- 13.25.

How much is that a year?

I don't know. Say 20 grand, ok?

So then another two years, he'll be straw boss.

He's a smart little bastard.

That's better than college.

Sure, better than college.

He don't go to dipshit college.

Am I right?

You fuck around in college four years.

That's four years of fucking around.

He'd get a job

jerking off a pencil-- 8 grand!

He's too smart for college.

Fucking-a, too smart!

Fuck it! Into the union!

Where the action is!

Am I right?

Don't give me right, I ain't right.

You're right-- oh, Jesus!

Look at the tits on that one.

Hey! Hey! You want a ride?

Hey, you need a ride?

We got a ride.

Not like the one I give.

Look at this.

What you got there?

What does it look like?

A prick, only smaller.

Whoo!

Oh!

Whoo! Mine's a flasher!

Hey, somebody's at the door.

Cheri!

It's Stony!

Aw, shit.

Go away, Stony. Quit it!

Break this door, my folks will kill me.

Hey, I can take care of this guy.

Get out of here!

Thank you for a wonderful evening.

You balling this guy?

Yeah, I am.

You love him?

No. I'm doing it for science.

You fucking...

Hey, De Coco. Hey, fuckface.

Come here, you Guinea asshole.

What are you talking about?