Get Mean

We have been expecting you.

Please, sit down.

Eat.

That's $10,000.

- Whose is it? - For you.

Me?

Our land has been conquered by a barbaric race.

We would like you to escort the present heir to the throne

back to our people in Spain so she can help to lead the army

and overthrow the barbarians.

For many years, a great number of poor people has sacrificed

to collect this money.

- For what? - For me.

I have the great honor to present Princess Elizabeth Maria de Borges...

direct descendant of one of our most noble families.

And we're willing to pay any amount for her safe conduct to Spain.

Well, I don't know who you are,

and I don't know nothin' about no barbarians.

Hell, I don't even know where this place Spain is you're talkin' about.

But I'll tell you one thing...

You raise this pot here...

to $50,000 gold,

lady, I'll take you any goddamn place you want to go.

Is that the kind of respect you show for royalty?

Look...

business is business,

and I happen to be a businessman.

And besides,

if I really thought you were a princess,

well, I'd ask for $100,000.

Let me go!

Where is the girl?

Leave him alone! He knows nothing!

Where is she?

Let me go!

What the hell is that supposed to be? Mm!

Excuse me, pal.

This belongs to me.

- What's that? - It was built by the Moors

when they came here years ago

to help my people conquer the barbarians.

In this place, they once kept the treasure of Rodrigo.

- The what? - The treasure of Rodrigo.

Who's that?

Our enemies, the barbarians.

What about them?

- The Moors. - The what?

- The Moors. - Now, lady,

them people are fixin' to "fonch" upon one another.

Best we get the hell out of here.

Get your stuff.

Them's the barbarians, right?

And them's the Moors, right?

Yes.

Now, this is a dangerous country.

They're fightin' everywhere. Let's go. Come on.

Come on!

Wait!

That's the Moorish army. They've come to help my people.

- You must do something! - What do you want me to do?

I command you to help my army!

And I command you to shut up, lady,

because you're gettin' on my nerves.

Fire!

Fire!

Fire!

Let's go!

You butchers! You pigs!

You stupid woman!

You don't understand who you're speaking to!

No, you are the one who doesn't understand.

I am a princess, Elizabeth Maria de Borges.

Let me welcome you to Spain

and offer you the hospitality of my humble house.

I accept nothing that is already mine.

I am the rightful ruler of this land.

You own nothing but the army of that man!

Look.

This little woman here fell off her horse

a few days back and hurt her head.

Now she's crazy.

Ah, come on, you guys.

If you really think she's a princess,

you're all crazy.

She's not a princess, she's an ill-bred bitch!

Just hold on there.

I'm supposed to get $50,000

for delivering her, whatever she is.

How much is that?

It would buy you 2,000 horses.

Stupid foreigners.

You come to my country, and you insult me.

- I kill you both! - Diego!

If I've told you once,

live told you a hundred times...

You must never lose control in front of the men.

Diego, hang him.

By his feet.

Huh?

Tie his feet!

Hang him!

Now, let's talk this thing over.

We can make a deal.

Hell, I'll take $25,000.

Hang him!

Hey, come back here! Where are you going?

Where are you going, you bunch of foreigners?

You can't treat a man like this!

Hey! Cut me down!

I ain't no goddamn dog!

You barbaric sons of bitches!

I'm gonna get you!

I'll kill you!

'Cause I ain't leaving this country

until I get my damn money!

O mighty stallion of Rodrigo, we salute you!

We thank you for this victory!

There's the Emir. Get him.

Come on.

My name is Morelia. You are among friends.

Well, lady,

I'll tell you,

I sure could use a friend.

This is the princess's Emir,

the general of her army.

No.

He's dying.

Listen, ask him about my money, will ya?

There's no way to pay you

until Rodrigo's treasure has been found.

Look, lady, a deal's a deal.

I was supposed to bring her to you, and I did,

and now I want my $50,000.

He's dying!

Please, tell us the secret of the treasure.

The princess...

is the only one who can claim the treasure.

Please, Emir, we have to know.

You are dying.

Where is she?

Where... Where is the princess?

Mosque Vesuvius.

What'd he say?

Mosque Vesuvius.

The what?

It's a temple in the mountains.

Oh, dear God,

they got everything in this country!

And what do I got, lady?

Well, I'll tell you what I got.

I got nothin'.

Nothing!

Hurry! We must go!

Hold on, there.

- What's going on? - Diego's men are searching the town.

Come on!

Hyah! Hyah!

You barbarian fellas think it's funny

to hang a man by his feet, don't ya?

Now, you go back and tell your boss I'm comin' in,

and I want to make a deal about the treasure.

Okay?

This is the Ancient Fortress of Rodrigo.

- All right, you wait for me here. - Be careful.

Gypsy girl,

my old lady never raised no dummies.

Where's your boss?

Well, get that animal out of the way, and I'll take you to him.

Eat.

Laugh.

Enjoy yourselves!

Now, nobody get nervous...

because I come in peace.

Take a look at this stuff, Chief.

Beads. Pretty beads.

Okay.

How 'bout a new kind of looking glass...

I bring from big country... America.

Don't be shy. Take it.

All right.

How 'bout this?

That's a nice hat for your wife.

I have six wives.

Oh, looks like you've been robbing the cradle, there, Chief.

You insult me!

First you demand

I pay $50,000 for the princess!

Then...

you kill six...

Six of my men!

And now...

you dare to tell me...

you come in peace!

If he kills me, you'll never get your treasure!

Treasure? What treasure?

The treasure of Rodrigo.

Where? Where is it? Give it to me!

I ain't givin' him nothin'.

You tell him I'll trade him even up...

The princess for the treasure.