Pete Kelly's Blues

Ashes to ashes, dust to dust

Women don't get you The whiskey must

He was a good man.

Sure enough he was. He's gone but not forgotten.

- Amen. - Amen.

- We'll always remember him. - Sure enough we will.

- Yes, he's gone. - Good man gone.

- We'll never forget him. - Amen.

Yes, he was a good man.

Glory.

He rambled and he rambled till the butcher cut him down.

All right, that'll do it. Let's go let up some air.

Blow through that a while.

We need time to count it. Sugar can.

How about it, Pete? Next set on the drums.

It's all right with me. Get Joey's vote.

If you're looking for a new way to grow old, this is the place to come.

17 Cherry Street, Kansas City.

It's a speakeasy one flight down.

It was a brownstone at first. After that an undertaker had the place.

But he went to Chicago to get a piece of the flu epidemic...

and Rudy Shulak took over.

Rudy got a booze contract out of Joplin and bought some tablecloths.

It's been a gin bin ever since.

There's even a little business on the side for shut-ins.

Rudy's a puny little guy.

Sew an extra button on his vest, he'd fall down.

But he's all right.

The beer's good, the whiskey's aged, if you get here late in the day.

On top of that, he knows where to spend money.

He knows where to save it.

And he's good to the help. He pays scale with a $5 kickback.

I play cornet and run the band.

We play from 10 till 4 with a 20-minute pizza break.

The hours are bad but the music suits us.

There's one other thing about Rudy's and that's trouble.

You can get it by the yard, the pound, wholesale or retail.

Like one Tuesday night.

A lot of people were busy that night.

- Rudy wants to see you. - What have you got in there?

Milo Violets, Deities, Sweet Caporals. Anything you want.

You going by the Plantation later? Bennie Moten's in.

I don't know. Pack some lunch. We'll see.

Go in my office. Have a talk with Fran McCarg.

- Who's she? - It's a he.

Go light. He's downstate gun for Colissimo.

We're out of champagne. You gotta squeeze.

- What's this McCarg doing up here? - I heard some 22nd Ward business.

- What's he want with me? - Huh?

What's he want with me?

Maybe he wants you to run for something. I got no idea.

But you'd better see him.

I don't know why you let people like that in here.

In Topeka I let in three nice old ladies. They took out an ax and broke every bottle.

What's that got to do with it?

Stuck up a sign, said I was a disgrace to fatherhood.

They know I didn't have no kids.

Now, don't tell me stuff. Just go talk to McCarg.

All right, Dad.

Hey, wanna go to a party? Two hundred people, Ivy's house.

- Bring the band. - If the party was so good, why'd you leave?

To get more people. It's the only reason to leave. Have a drink.

Hey, you coming or not?

Not.

- Quite a fighter, Johnny Risko. - He'll do.

I'm Fran McCarg. You know Guy Bettenhouser?

- You've got a nice band, Kelly. - Thanks. We finished together.

That's why I'd like to do something for you.

- Cigarette? - This what you had in mind?

- No, an agent. - We got one.

I'm going into business handling a few bands. I'd like to sign you.

We got an agent, Phil Mishkin.

I know, but you don't want him, he's a bungler.

We got a contract. We can't break it.

And we can't pay two commissions.

Get that lump out of your throat.

We're already on short dough. The fellas, they got families.

Everybody's got them.

They can't come up with 10 percent. They got families.

Look, the only guy who didn't was Adam. How long did he come up empty?

So don't tell me your troubles.

Point is, I'm starting a list of clients, I want you on it.

I can't answer for the whole band.

Line them up and count noses. I'll be back at closing.

Kelly, just so you know, we give services.

Not 10 percent, it's 25. We got a big overhead.

Yeah. I noticed him.

We should add a baritone. Plenty of bands got them.

- Too muddy. No bite. - No, it wouldn't hurt.

Couldn't we add something on the low end?

Maybe.

What about "Tin Roof Blues"?

In the morning, that phonograph does "Tin Roof," all right?

- You listening, Pete? - It'll keep.

How'd you boys like another manager? Fella named Fran McCarg.

We got an agent.

I covered all that. It's a shakedown, he wants 25 percent.

- Serious? - Waiting to hear from us.

Tell him no, you can tell him now.

- You get in touch with the union? - Not yet.

Guy must be crazy. Rudy don't pay us nothing now.

I don't mind working free, but I don't wanna pay commission.

- What about the rest of you? - When it's late at night, pay off.

- He's not talking about tonight. - That's what I say, when it's late, pay off.

Bedido?

Maybe Joey's right. Get a few bucks ahead, you don't wanna give it all away.

We're getting ahead. Enough to buy new drums and coats that match.

- You tell us we gotta cut ourselves out. - I'm not telling you anything.

You wanna vote? We don't need no vote. Tell this guy no.

- Do you know who McCarg is? - No, I never met him.

Do you know? You?

- You? - I don't care who knows him.

If the band throws in with him, I'll go to the Blue Devils.

He'll get to them. He'll get to every ragtime outfit in town.

Then I'll go with the Salvation Army.

That's the truth, Pete. I'm rather be second drummer for them.

We can't argue all night. What do I tell McCarg?

Everybody's had a say. Now you say.

I don't wanna break the band up.

If Joey's on the level, let's say no and see what happens.

Joey.

Salvation Army wouldn't have worked.

You gotta be able to read music.

Al, what do you think about McCarg?

Will he cause any trouble?

I don't see how. He'll kill one of us. That's no trouble.

All right, let's do some Scott Joplin. How about "Pineapple," all right, Al?

- Yeah, if I can find my fingers. - Kelly.

I don't care what the menu says. Spaghetti separate from meatball, charge for both.

You can pack up. I promised you'd go to a party.

We gotta be around for closing. McCarg's coming.

- I'll tell him. - Where will we be?

- Her name's Ivy Conrad. - Not that open furnace. I told her no.

- I already told her yes. - How much?

We're in trouble. I gotta see McCarg and explain.

I made a deal, she wants you to do a favor.

- What kind of favor? - She lost her hat.

Bring it to her.

A few minutes after, we borrowed Rudy's car and got started.

We were late because Joey said he wanted to change his tie.

My name's Kelly. If a call comes in, will you let me know?

She's a real eggbeater, isn't she?

Put this in your pocket, will you?

Hey, let's you and me be a big secret.

No. Not now.

I've got plenty left, Ivy.

Catch, Kelly.

Oh, no, let me stay. I'll pay rent.

This is Kelly, everybody. He's a musician.

You don't like me, do you?

I don't know much about you except what's in the papers.

- Oh, the kidnapping. - Huh?

I was kidnapped once.

- What happened? - They turned me loose after three days.

- Yeah? - Couldn't stand me.

I wish they'd play "Roses of Picardy."

Wouldn't it be wonderful to go there, Kelly?

Run off to some romantic spot.

Capri or the Dardanelles.

Some romantic place like that.

Have you ever thought of it?

I once spent a weekend at the Muhlebach.

If I ever go to the Dardanelles, I want you to go too, Kelly.

I'll get the horn.

Mr. Kelly. Phone call. Mr. Pete Kelly.

Here.

- Phone call. Mr. Pete Kelly. - He's busy. I'll take it.

Hello?

No, this is Joey Firestone. Who are you?

Oh, well, I can tell you, Mr. McCarg. The answer is no.

If he was here, he'd tell you the same thing.

Go get a ticket to nowhere!

That's telling him, fat lady?

Come here, everybody. Kelly's gonna toot for us.

- They're having too good a time. - You're supposed to play.

I got ordered to a party, not a concert.

- You won't play, so Johnny will play. - Put down that horn, buster.

- I'll just play one tune. - You'll play it off your tonsils.

- Give me the horn. - We'll throw it in the pool.

Maybe the fish will play.

Give me the horn. Give it to me.

Don't catch cold.

Come on, Pete, get a bar in.

Now, calm down. There's somebody following us.

He must have banged out right through the windshield.

We'd better get up to the road and stop a car.

You go that way. Let's try to get to a phone.

He didn't bang out, he floated out.

- That sounded pretty good. - Yeah.

How was it?

Think you'll like that. I'll play it back.

Yeah, mac, let's hear it.

- It was a good chorus, Al. - Thanks.

Can I talk to you, Pete? Outside.

Sure.

I was wondering how soon you could spare me.

Never. Unless you're serious, Al.

And if you are, anytime.

Then I guess I'll mosey on.

All this trouble, I'm not rested up for it.