Shameless

Ah, for shit's sake, you again?

Really, you forgot what happened on

last week's episode? It was seven days ago.

Drop the drink and get yourself to a fucking meeting,

you loser.

I'm busting my ass to get you out of this shit hole.

My work here's not done.

I-I need a few more days.

You don't think I should bail him out?

If he skips town, you lose all your money.

Could be put to better use.

- How? - I don't know.

Invest in another apartment building.

Buy a café, yoga studio.

Why don't you come stay with me for a couple of days?

That'd be cool.

You spend all your time hanging out with that

10-year-old girl.

She doesn't have anybody else.

Call DCFS, bro.

Shit ain't your problem.

Eighteen dollars? I make fifteen.

Well, you're a girl. Way of the world, Jugs

V, why they got so much energy now?

Go get it.

So well-behaved.

Pre-school.

What are your plans for after graduation, Corporal?

Sir?

Cadet lieutenants have traditionally gone on

to service academies.

West Point?

Get a congressman or senator's recommendation.

You really think I could, Sir?

There's an epidemic at our school.

Four people have tested positive

for virulent strains of multiple STDs.

- I slept with Frank. - So did I.

- I slept with Frank. - Frank.

Good morning, my day-drinking brethren.

- How's everyone this morning? - We were good.

You smell like actual shit, Frank.

Uh, rye whiskey, V. Leave the bottle.

Can't pay with cans, Frank.

Why not? There's gotta be 20 bucks in there.

And that's our recycling.

I just put those out.

Right, and now I'm recycling them.

No.

Uh, run a tab? For old times' sake?

Oh, damn, I just peed myself a little.

Guys, can you spot me?

We fucking hate you, Frank.

V.

Can I have the keg tray? At least let me drink that.

You wanna slurp warm, day-old beer runoff from a keg tray?

Wow, lowering the bar, Frank.

- Disgusting, Frank. - Every day.

When options are few, the wise man adapts.

Fine. One pity beer. One.

You tight on cash, huh, Frank?

Tighter than a Mormon virgin.

I know how you can make some quick dough,

if you're interested.

I don't do blowies anymore, Hughie.

This lady's paying five bucks

for every "Ruiz for Congress" sign you steal from a yard.

You bring the signs over to the alley

behind Wyman's headquarters, she gives you cash.

For stolen signs? What's the catch?

Just get paid to steal.

All right, thanks.

What's with the uniform, GI Joe?

I thought you were off for the summer.

Yeah, aren't you supposed to be "at rest"?

At ease. And there is no ease

for a soldier who's West Point bound.

Debs, can you pass me the milk?

Debs.

Eighty cents.

That's how much women make on the dollar compared to men.

And if you're a woman of color, 65 cents.

This is a sexist shit nugget of a country.

- Don't you forget that. - Oh, Debs!

Thank God you're not working. Hey, I need a favor.

I gotta take V to this nursery school tour.

Can you watch the girls for like an hour?

They can't come. Thanks.

Why are you speaking to me?

- 'Cause you're Debbie. - No.

Why are you speaking to the only woman in the room,

Kevin Ball?

Why is childcare a woman's job?

Let me tell you why.

Did you know that the average American man

works about 17.5 hours a week doing unpaid home labor?

Cooking, cleaning. While women, however,

spend about 28.4 hours a week.

Now, considering the fact that the average American

makes $26.82 an hour, that's $40,000 a year

that women are not getting paid

to cook, clean, and wipe baby asses.

So you can't do it?

Come on, Franny, let's oppose patriarchal oppression.

Yeah!

Lip, just an hour, man. Please.

- No. - Just one hour.

I can't. I would. I gotta head to a meeting before work.

- I'm sorry. - Carl! My man.

Yeah, sorry, I got a parley with a superior at 0900.

I can do it. I don't have school.

Amazing! Thank you so much.

Here's their diaper bag.

Who are you, again?

This is Xan, she's staying with us for a while.

Are you sure? I mean, that's really nice of you.

- You're paying, right? - Bless you, Xanadu.

- You're good? Sure? - Yeah.

- All right. - I gotta get going.

- Yeah, me too. - Yeah, Lip,

I'm already late for school. Take me?

Yeah, I got you.

Oh, Hi!

There you go, Bud. Hey, Xan, text me, all right?

- Yeah. - Okay.

Mm.

Hey. You know Max Whitford?

The guy from the bus benches?

Yeah, he's the number one commercial real estate agent

in Chicago.

So says bench boy.

He sold Miles that place over on 26th street. Why?

I got a meeting with him today.

I'm gonna start looking at commercial properties.

Ian's bail money is burning a hole in my pocket,

so I'm gonna spend my equity on buying another property.

Commercial real estate?

Yeah, you were the one who told me to invest.

I meant maybe buy another building, some apartments.

Those things are mini-malls.

And mini-malls are out of my league?

Max Whitford's just gonna try and fuck you, trust me.

Well, I can handle men trying to fuck me.

I've been doing that since I was nine.

Commercial real estate carries more risk.

I did pretty great flipping that laundromat.

I just don't think it's for you.

Who's it for then?

It's for people who were born on third base

and think they hit a triple.

Oh, so I have to be an un-fuckable trust fund baby

to get anywhere in life, that's what you're saying?

You know what? Forget it.

Don't worry about it.

I turned a profit on not one, but two properties.

I know you did.

- And you'll do great. - Mm-hmm.

So what are you guys in for?

Stole a first grader's Black Amex.

Didn't share my breakfast sushi.

Cool.

Liam, come in, please.

Are you familiar with the saying

"sins of the father"?

Think I've heard it at home.

Your father made a lot of Hopkins parents very...

unhappy, and where there's unhappiness,

there's often anger and retribution.

The Committee for Diversity and Advancement

who fund your scholarship, they have made some demands

and, well,

we've loved having you here, son.

Why are you speaking in past tense?

We see this as an opportunity for you.

With the step up that we have given you,

you can soar now, little bird.

I'm getting kicked out?

Yeah.

Are you lost, honey?

Cadet Lieutenant Carl Gallagher.

I'm here to see Congressman Ubberman, ma'am.

Why?

I seek the honor of his recommendation for West Point.

Are you a constituent?

Ma'am?

You live around here?

Okay, sweetheart, I'll tell you how this works.

First, you set up an appointment,

and the first avail we have is in nine weeks.

And you come back with your transcripts and your vitae...

My what?

Your athletic and your academic achievements.

You know, publications, awards,

and your exceptional record

of your volunteer work in this community.

Volunteer work?

You have to work for free to get into West Point?

Thought you just had to wanna kill some towel heads.

The 100 hours of community service I did