Huff

This girl is dead, Russell.

Yeah, I know. I...

I pounded on her chest, gave her mouth-to-mouth. I did all that stuff.

Ok. How fucked-up are you?

She had fucking green foam... stuff on her mouth.

But it tasted like... bitter lemon or some shit. What is that stuff?

Russell, did you call 911?

Yep. You think they're gonna play that on the news, buddy?

Where the fuck are the paramedics?

They're comin'.

They're all comin', the, um... cops, paramedics, coroner.

P.T. Barnum, everybody.

I am so proud of you.

Thank you for your help, Melora.

I could've not done this without you.

Well, you haven't done it yet, honey.

No, but I will, and I'm gonna do it right, too,

because this is my first and my last.

I have screwed up so much in my life. But not this time.

So... one more time.

- Birthing trough and hose. - Check.

- Phone list. - Check.

- Cell and pager. - Check, check.

Food a formula if the breast milk doesn't flow.

Check.

Birthing gown, clean laundry, and diapers.

Check, check, and...

I don't have any diapers.

Well, so get diapers.

You've got time.

Are they gonna... are they gonna play it on the news, do you think?

Russell.

Here come... here come the cops.

Hey! Hey! Russell! Come on. Need your focus.

- Ok. Come on. - Here we go. Let's go. Siren.

Let's go. You hear that?

You gotta get some pants on. Come on.

The circus is my fuckin' life.

Well... 'scuse me. 'Scuse me, darlin'. Whoopsie.

- Russell! - Got some flushin', do some flushin'.

- Pants. Pants. Pants. - Ok.

Oh, look at these adorable little bats and balls.

That puffy father never came around.

Oh, yes. Yes, he did.

He painted monkeys on the wall.

He made rite aid runs for my prenatal.

He answered his pager faster than a bullet through jell-o.

Yep.

He, uh, cannot wait to witness the birth of his son.

No, he came around. He came around big time.

Yep. He really...

he got his act together.

Yeah. I, um... I went upstairs.

Didn't I tell you that? I told you that, like, 3 times already, didn't I?

And when you came down, she was, uh, she was dead.

Yeah, dead. Not breathing.

Twitching. You know?

Very different from what she was before I went upstairs, is what I'm tryin' to say.

She was twitching?

Yeah. Twitching.

She had a little, um... you know, frothing... actually... at the mouth.

So, uh... anyway, what difference does it make? She died on me. Right?

Anyway, I'm just so curious.

Um... how come... how come you're, uh...

this, like, a crime scene all of a sudden or somethin'?

Well, I mean, how come you waited to call the paramedics?

And how come you're--you're not sure if she was breathing or twitching?

- Oh. Well-- - And look at you.

How come you're-- you're sweating like a stuck pig?

Fuck. You know, come on. I just--I'm upset. You know?

And I-- I'm... hot. I don't know.

Well... exactly. You don't know.

Neither do we.

And that's why I'm treatin' this like a crime scene.

- That's good. Good. - Ok, Dick.

Come here.

Just so you know... I am an attorney, so if you need any... help with anything...

Ah. I'm glad you told me.

- Good. - Excuse me.

Check this out.

She's got dried blood...

white powder underneath her nose. Just a little pinch.

Look at this guy.

If he's not tweakin', I'm goin' back to law school.

You--a problem? There a problem, officer?

Aside from a dead body in your living room, what could be wrong?

I had to terminate that mission because of my brother.

He's not on our side, and...

I had no choice but to let him kidnap me.

But I maneuvered to this... rendezvous point by the sea.

Thank you, sir.

We leave tomorrow... early.

0800.

I'll wait word there. No word, track back up the coast to Oaxaca.

Si.

Theodorus.

Get this shit inside.

Hey.

Hey. Hey!

What?

It's late. Go to bed.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I just--just-- I gotta finish this paper, all right?

Gimme half an hour.

What is it?

English.

Oh. Yeah? English what?

Literature or... history?

Look, mom, if you want to talk about something, just talk about it. Ok?

I mean, we both know you give about as much of a shit about this paper as I do.

Right.

I met your dad in an english lit class in college.

Congratulations. You divorced him in California.

We are not divorced.

Look. Mom... just cut him loose. Ok?

Get every nickel you can and just cut bait.

Cut bait?

Yeah. It's like when you're fishing. You know?

And... you've hooked a big one, but it's so fucking big that you just--

you can't reel it in, and if you keep trying,

it's just gonna rip the pole right outta your hands.

So you cut the line.

All right?

Dad just doesn't want to get reeled in. Ok?

Mom... cut bait and make sure gram goes with him.

Do you know that she hit me?

Did she tell you she just hauled off and slugged me?

No.

She was probably in a fuckin' blackout.

Smelled like she was drinking lightefluid.

She hit you?

Look, mom, I cut bait. All right? Good night.

Good night.

Please stop saying "fuck."

"I will. I'm sorry, mom."

It's ok.

We've all been under a lot of stress.

So. Life is riddled with choices. What's your point?

We have good reason to believe you're under the influence of a controlled substance.

Who, me? No, no, no, no, no.

- Open your eyes, please. - Hey, hey.

Just open your eyes a second, please. Ok, just open your eyes.

- Well, it's so fuckin' bright. - Open your eyes. That's ok.

- Open 'em. Open 'em, please. - Ok, they're open.

There you go. Pupils are a little whacked.

Well, fuckin' what? It's dark! All right?

Gimme your wrist.

Stay still, please.

Old buddy passes away in the privacy of my own home,

Jack Klugman here's gotta... take my... my blood pressure.

Pulse, actually. There's a difference.

- It's 1-40. - Ooh, that high?

Fast. Pulses are... fast.

Yeah, well, your pulse pressure would be... high, too,

if an old buddy just passed away... in your...

fuckin' ottoman! On my ottoman!

- Close your eyes, please. - Ok. Sorry.

Tilt your head back.

Let me know when you think 30 seconds have passed, please.

30.

Nope, nope.

20.

- That's 15. - I got 20.

- Cuff this piece of shit. - Fuck you!

You've got the right to remain silent. You can buy your fuckin' cunt!

You can buy your cunt! That's what you did.

Get him the fuck in the car!

Fuck you. This is no 11-50, and you fuckin' know it!

- You comin' with, buddy? - Yeah, I'm comin'.

No, you're not.

- Can't I go with him? - No.

- Why can't he come? - Why can't I come?

Because your friend' got an appointment for a mug shot and fingerprints.

Yeah, he's my friend.

And I met Sinatra in the seventies. So fuckin' what?

Hey! Hey, buddy, you wanna crash here, crash here.

I got the guest room made up. Palato was just here.

No. Do you need bail?

No, man. I'll use my credit card for that, and I'll get Miles out of it.

You're gonna eat this, you pussy-ass, fuckin' shit-hook, nigger-killin' cunt!

Ow! Fuck!

Your friend's a jerk-off, huh?

Guys... take him to...

I made the reservation myself 2 hours ago.

Huffstodt. H-U-F-F...

I'm sorry, sir. I don't see it here.

Well, can you please check again? Please?

I can't go home. My wife won't let me back in the house.

And the guy I was staying with just got arrested

'cause a prostitute overdosed in his living room.

Coroner hasn't quite got the body out yet, so...

whatever you can do to help me, I'd appreciate.

Smoking?

Snorting.

You mean the room.

Sure. Ok. Smoking... is fine. Whatever you have.

Do you have any luggage in your car?

This watch, darling...

cost more than you make in a year.

So no funny business with the old switch-a-roonie from the old counterfeit bin, ok?

Comprendo? I know how you people like to work.