Reckoning

Bless me, Father, for I have sinned.

I've struggled for so long...

to be the man I wanna be, but I keep failing.

What I do...

who I am...

is hurting the people I love the most.

And God will forgive you that. -I don't want God's forgiveness.

If there really is a God,

what I want is for him to protect my family

from what I've done.

Can he do that?

Will he do that?

Be yourself, you know? You're enough as you are.

But hey, it's okay also to be guarded. You don't have to make friends on your first day.

I already know Caitlin and Todd.

Still, it's a-- It's a big school.

-You got your phone? And it's charged? -Yeah.

Okay, well, don't forget to text me the moment you get home.

Are you gonna be okay, Dad?

Absolutely.

-Yeah? -Dad, maybe this was a mistake.

-What? -Changing schools.

-You said it's not too late to return to Willmont. -Forget what I said.

You've been lobbying me and your mom to go to public school for two years, right?

I knew you didn't want me to,

that it would make you uncomfortable and a little...

-Crazier than usual. -No.

You know what I mean.

Look, you wanna be here and I want what you want, okay?

I'm fine. I'm fine, sweetheart.

Okay, I'll be fine. How about that? All right.

-You be safe. Okay. -Okay.

Whoa.

Bye, Dad.

First day.

-Where are you going? -I'm parking the car.

No, you have to drop me off. I'm not coming in there with you.

No, no, you're gonna do great, Pax.

You know, if you need me, I'm right there.

Look, you gotta look at this as a new adventure.

You're gonna make friends in no time, I promise.

Do most...? Do most kids like you or...? I mean, do they think you're pretty cool?

Yeah, most. I hope.

-Okay, so when they find out I'm your son? -Just don't worry so much, okay?

Just be yourself.

Hey, it's better than being Brian Shaffer.

You see that big lug of a guy? He's been held back twice.

Not the brightest bulb.

Is everybody gonna know what I did at my old school?

No, of course not.

That's our secret, all right?

Okay.

Oh, she's back. Jackie!

How many weeks you get?

-Sir, it's ridiculous. -What's up?

Nice board, Andy. I like it.

Excuse me.

Good morning, Canaan High School faculty and students.

Welcome back, Coyotes.

At this time, we want to urge any students with information

regarding the whereabouts of senior Gretchen McGrath

to please report to Principal Taft's office.

Also, anyone wishing to try out for this year's fall play can sign up at the front desk.

Morning, Marcy. -Morning, Mike.

Catch your breath. Chief wants to see you when you have a sec.

What about? Too official for me. Heh.

What sort of mother doesn't call the police for four days to report her daughter missing, hm?

My partner in already?

Oh, I think I saw her heading down to archives.

What are you doing, Ramos?

New kid on the block. Just doing a little homework.

Yeah, don't go making a mess, all right?

Stop, please. I-- I got a system.

Frankly, you're wasting your time. These are cold.

Quiet too. Five years now.

Still, it's your baby, right?

And what you said yesterday about our missing girl?

Gretchen's missing, all right? Not a body.

I got a call this morning from Iris Swan's mother.

Linda called you? Why?

Says she has some information on her daughter's murder.

Let me handle that, okay?

What's the latest on Gretchen McGrath?

Heard she had an itch to run away.

Well, just because she's a troubled kid doesn't mean there isn't foul play.

Not a kid. Turned 18 three weeks ago.

But the point is she's a local high school student.

You know, best for everyone if we can locate her.

Of course. But I'm worried about you, Mike.

Just being honest.

Promise me you're not starting to make leaps of logic here.

She's a missing girl, not a body. Tattoo or no tattoo.

Relax. I just told Ramos the same thing.

Maybe you should check in with Dr. Geller.

There's no shame in asking for help.

-What, so he can show me his creepy inkblots? -If it helps.

Department can't afford to lose you again.

What's on your mind, Ramos?

Linda mentioned she hadn't seen you in a while.

She used to you coming around?

Is that your question?

Just wondering...

is there anything to these rumors about your closeness

to the RRK victims' mothers?

Oh, yeah, yeah, that's all true.

I'm planning on fucking Linda Swan right now, so it's probably best you stay in the car, huh?

Hey. Hey.

You okay? -Oh, you know.

You going to your meetings?

My sponsor dragged me to one this morning at the crack of dawn.

-Where's Tuck? -He's next door with Cora.

He likes her better than me.

-I doubt that's true. -Oh, it is at the moment, I'm afraid.

Because I won't give him a clown for his birthday party.

He's turning 7 next week, huh?

His new thing is to remind me that I'm his grandma, not his mother.

Oh, he loves you. And you love him. He's a lucky little man.

He's a pain in my ass, is what he is.

He's just like his mother was.

My partner tells me that you have some new information on Iris's case.

Did she?

Look, I'm sorry I haven't had the chance to return your calls.

-That's okay. -Or stop by lately.

I just saw the news about that missing girl.

Most likely a runaway.

You don't believe that.

I don't believe that.

What say I come by on the weekend and I'll bring some groceries...

I don't want your groceries.

I want you to promise me

that what happened to my Iris doesn't happen to anyone else.

And now it could be happening again.

What do you want from me, Linda?

I want you to give me my daughter back.

I can't.

Let's move. Get back. You go, Ned! Yeah, Mikey.

You don't think I could get into Occidental?

-Early decision? -No.

I actually think you have an excellent chance,

but I tell everyone it's a good idea to have a few backup schools just to be safe.

Mmm. Safe is boring. Maybe I like a little risk.

What about USF and LMU?

You expressed interest in both schools last time we met.

Do it for me?

-Fine. I'll do it for you. -Mm.

LMU, USF, Seattle U.

But you gotta promise to help me with the applications.

Lacey, that's what I'm here for.

So, um, how are things with your wife?

I don't think that's an appropriate question, Lacey. Do you?

I'm gonna get into Occidental. Early decision. Just watch me.

I'd bet money on it.

Answer the question. Have you seen Gretchen McGrath or not?

This is harassment. Not the first time either.

A girl goes missing, we check all registered sex offenders on that list.

That's why we have a list.

Like I said, never seen her before.

Did you use the ATM at QuickPump on Highway 12 last Friday, around 1 a.m.?

-Might have. -You did.

Then why are you asking?

Gretchen used the same ATM 40 minutes later. Happens to be her last known whereabouts.

And how many other people used that ATM between me and her?

Three.

But you come to my house.

Like I said, we found it interesting that you're on our list.

And since I'm on your list, you know my story.

Got a devotion to little boys, not teenage girls.

So go bother someone else who gives a shit.